A Cold Farewell
by Thralni
Summary: One fateful evening, distracted by a beautiful young native by the name of Jacob, and everything had gone wrong. Suddenly Edward finds himself without a family, out on the streets, alone and in the frigid cold of a new winter. Now, he needs to pick up the pieces of a shattered life - with or without Jacob. Slash. Warnings inside.
1. Paradise Lost

**A Cold Farewell**

_Disclaimer: The characters are property of Stephanie Meyer. The plot of this story is copyrighted 2014 to me, Thralni. The story was written for fun - not for financial or any other kind of intentional gain._

**A/N:** Hello and welcome! This is my first ever fanfiction, though it is not the first story I ever wrote. Still, the genre is somewhat new to me, so _**I would be grateful for any review**_ that gives encouragement, criticism, suggestions, tips; whatever! While I have an idea for how the story will unfold and eventually end, ideas and such are of course welcome. As for the update schedule, I refrain from making any promises, though I hope to update at least once every two weeks. **Warnings**: **This story will include _slash_, _angst, drama, violence_ and various _romantic_ and _kinky_ scenes.** **If you don't like any of that, don't read it. **I will try to warn at the start of each chapter.

_This chapter contains violence, angst, drama and kinky scenes._ A thanks to **Lineia** and **dantemalfoy** for comments!

For now, enjoy!

**Chapter 1: Paradise lost**

Edward sat on the comfortable couch in the living room. His gaze was directed downward, his mouth in a tight grimace of pain after his father – Carlisle, a middle-aged man with blond hair, dark-blue slippers, grey pants, a light-blue shirt and a small, silver cross on a chain around his neck – had smacked him across the face. His left cheek was sore, a tingling sensation making it feel warm.

His father stood in front of him, about a meter away, both his fists clenched and with an expression on his face that was twisted from anger. Behind him, on the other couch, sat his wife and Edward's mother, Esme. She had averted her gaze and closed her eyes. Her two hands held over mouth and nose, she seemed to want to ignore what had happened here just now.

To the left of her, all macho manliness and muscle, sat Emmett, his brother. While his facial expression itself didn't reveal any significant shock, his eyes radiated bewilderment. Behind his mother, but leaning on her shoulders with her frail arms, stood Alice, his sister. Her expression was one of painful worry, as a tear had noticeably found its way down her cheek, and was now hanging helplessly from her chin. It evidently wasn't big enough to drop at its own accord. But not for long: the drop fell, after several more tears had revealed themselves to the world.

Suddenly Alice launched herself from her mother's shoulders and paced out of the room, audibly sobbing, up the stairs. A door slammed shut somewhere in the house. Finally, in front of the window stood Jasper, the last of his siblings. Ponderingly, he gazed outside, arms crossed and head drooped. Edward could tell that he was as shocked and disappointed at him as the others.

Edward's lower lip was trembling with anxiety. Still, he slowly raised his gaze. He saw his mother, her eyes shut tight, clenching a paper tissue in her left hand, which she held by her nose. She must have taken one from the box of tissues that was comfortably placed on the small table just beside the couch. He didn't have to look to know the box was there; he had placed it there himself. He had imagined she was going to need it. She blew her nose loudly, and sobbed.

Save for the wet cheeks, it struck him how beautiful she was. She wore her dark blue, silk dress. It was the colour he had always loved most. Emmett was still sitting next to her, eyes still radiating that bewilderment, but he too had now averted his gaze. He seemed to be staring intently at the white carpet, probably trying hard to think of something nicer than the spectacle unfolding before his eyes.

His lower lip still trembling, he continued to raise his gaze, but before he could raise it enough to look his father in the eyes, he was hit in the face again, this time hard enough to have him drop off the couch and land face-first on the floor. A small stream of blood flowed from his nose, staining the impeccable white carpet. He heard the heaving of his father and the sobbing of his mother. He lay there for what felt like eternity, too scared to move, fearing he might be hit again. The air in the room was thick with a tension of disappointment and repulsion. It penetrated his skin and made him feel inadequate for this world. Their hatred mixed with his fear, and stirred up feelings of hatred of his own.

But at whom was he angry? Was he angry with his father for beating him? Was he angry with himself for allowing the beating to continue? Was he perhaps angry with himself for being what he was? The confusion was palpable. It gripped him by the throat and choked him slowly, so that those few tears that he wanted to let out were frozen solid.

How different had his summer been... The memory of it shook loose a tear of regret that landed on the carpet next to the small stain of blood. He closed his eyes as he remembered how it had all started. He, Alice and Emmet had gone out one evening to celebrate the end of the semester and the start of summer vacation. Jasper had gone to work, but would probably join them later.

He and his siblings all attended the same high school: Forks High School, in the small, sleepy town of Forks, WA. His parents had moved there a while ago and lived there ever since, in a secluded but huge villa: light, airy and surrounded by the forests that were so typical of Washington state. He remembered liking Forks from he start, even if it could be rather boring. In that case they always went to Port Angeles, a larger city not too far from Forks. They tended to go there for generic drinking, an occasional party and the local cinema.

That night, that's where they went: Port Angeles. To be specific: a local bar by the name of "Gaya". It had opened recently, and the siblings were curious as to what it was all about. At the time they hadn't understood the weird spelling of "Gaia" – the name given by the Greek to ancient mother Earth. They thought it to be some fancy new-age thing that hadn't reached Forks quite yet. A new trend from the city of Seattle, or something like that. Now of course it was painfully clear to him. He remembered laughing at their mistake once he understood that they had walked into a gay bar. His siblings were not amused.

Inside the bar was absolutely filled to the top. While the majority of the clientele was male, there were some females also. The three siblings ploughed their way towards the bar. Emmett arrived first and managed to order two beers and a glass of wine. In the meantime, the siblings had been noticed by the bartenders and some of the clientele in a way they all found a bit unnerving. The bartender that served them made a weird innuendo and at least the males could feel how prying eyes were sizing them up. The three quickly took their drinks and slithered in-between the sweaty customers to a corner of the bar, hoping to be left alone. But, they were followed.

They had sat down for exactly three minutes and had taken one sip of their drinks before a guy appeared at Emmett's side and had tapped his shoulder. Emmett looked round in surprise. His gaze was greeted by a set of impressive pectorals, occluded only partially by a white tank top. If anything, it only accentuated the massiveness of those muscles. Equally muscled arms and shoulders lined the beautiful chest. Looking up he saw a mischievous grin and eyes that sparkled with a lustful yearning. The guy asked Emmett something that obviously made him feel uncomfortable. His eyes bolted in the direction of his other two siblings, expressing some kind of wild panic. His head shot forward.

"Yo, I think we are in a gay bar!" he hissed.

"Let's get those drinks downed and get the hell out of this place!"

He quickly followed his own advice and Edward and Alice did the same. Soon they stood outside again, several whistles calling them back inside.

Edward felt uncomfortable as he stood outside, gazing at the setting sun. He felt uncomfortable, not because he disagreed with going away from the place, nor did he feel uncomfortable because he had been inside a gay bar. He felt uncomfortable because inside that bar he had seen things that he liked. That feeling was not new to him though.

He had been eyeing men before, spying on them as they went about their daily lives. And the more muscle the better! In particular he recalled a seemingly young, Native American guy. He was probably from the reservation nearby. The Quileute tribe inhabited that one. Admittedly, he didn't know too much about that place, and his father had urged him not to make contact. "A bunch of pagan heretics", he had always called them. And so Edward had stayed away from them.

But now this native had peaked Edward's interest. He ogled him from a distance, trying to hide behind a small bush. The boy had driven around on a rather rickety-looking mountain bike, wearing nothing more than denim pants and Nike running shoes. His shirtless torso was more than amazing – it was brilliant in all its muscly splendour.

A set of abs, stunning in their masculine expressivity, immediately pulled Edward's attention. He licked his dry lips as saliva filled his oral cavity, carefully following those chiselled, russet-coloured abs downward, eyes opened wide in anticipation. In-between the lower half of those abs, akin a river flowing inside a gorge, disappearing in the most mysterious cave, was the most delicious happy trail, which appetizingly disappeared in the native's pants. Edward gulped. The developed pectorals, tiny drops of sweat making them glimmer desirably in the sun, were set in a frame of mature shoulders, biceps and triceps. And the forearms! The forearms seemed massive; anything he would grip would probably be squashed. He had stirred at the thought, a noticeable bulge developing in his pants.

Then Edward's gaze was attracted to the young native's face. It was like a sculpture; as if somebody had carved it by hand, meticulously measuring every possible angle to maintain perfect symmetry. Two brown eyes in an oval face, so boyish and young, but with the first signs of a growing beard; and so he became a man. And the hair; oh how the hair gave of a mysterious air of nonchalance ready to be torn apart by yours truly. Oh how Edward wanted to sink his claws into that one… But he hadn't done anything about it. Instead, he had just stood behind his bush and the devilishly beautiful boy had cycled off into the distance.

This obsession with men had been going on for at least a year or two. He had always wondered what would happen if he approached one of them, try if he could get things off the ground with any of them. But he had never dared. In the beginning the whole idea just freaked him out, but as time progressed he grew more accustomed to his interest in men, be it platonic, romantic or purely sexual. That said, the word "gay" made him wince every time he heard it in the beginning, and to say it himself he could not. But, not letting emotions win him over too easily, he had entered into an LGBT debate club at his high school – without any of his friends or family members knowing of course – where he had learned to talk about his confusion and desires.

There he also learned to appreciate the agony many gay youth struggled with. While he had had his fair share of grief, he praised himself lucky that it hadn't been as bad as with other people. He distinctly recounted one guy, by the name of Benjamin, who had told about some giant crush he had on a straight guy. The pure agony of yearning had tore him apart at the end of it all, but it gave him a chance to recapitulate and rebuild himself in a gay way – or that's what it kind of came down to. He didn't stay in much contact with these people, although they still met up once every now and then for a drink. Thus, over time, he got used to his gayness. And while he didn't feel entirely comfortable with it, at least he had learned to live with it.

No, his own opinion on the topic and the feelings involved caused him no sorrow that night, when they stood outside Gaya. What did, was that he knew how his family thought about it. Their possible reactions frightened him. The reactions of Alice and Emmett to their attendance of a gay bar had been pretty revealing by and of themselves, and he'd rather not find out the reaction of his parents – especially his father. He could be a downright bastard and had already seen his hellish reaction to something that didn't please him before. Emmett had been the culprit that time. Suffice to say, he never got the thought into his head to do it again.

One thing was clear: _he had to get into Gaya again_, with or without his family agreeing to it. Hell, he wouldn't give them the chance to agree or disagree: he wouldn't let them know about it!

He would come up with plans and schemes to elude them. He would then go to that bar. He would find a guy and do all that he had fantasized about for so long. He could picture them doing it; how he would push his lover onto the bed, climb on top of him and kiss him passionately, while tying the arms to the bedposts with a thick, rough piece of rope playfully but forcefully. He would have him suck him off. Then he would suck the guy off as a thank you, and they would kiss again, bite each other in the neck, softly first but more harshly later. He would softly nuzzle the nipples and bite them intermittently, both softly and harshly so that his prey would yelp. He would tie off the guy's balls so that they became blue and hurting; right then he'd recurrently squeeze them, shooting bolts of pain up that spine that would make his victim squeal. And then? Then he would fuck him. Fuck the night away. Hard and forceful, precisely what the pig deserved. But they would cum together, their moaning joined in a choir of lustful anticipation, erupting in a conflagration of united bliss. He became hard as a rock thinking about it, planning every single knot he would be tying and every place he would bite.

"By god, I think he's having a… _You filthy little shit_!" His father's voice and another kick in his stomach awoke him rudely from his delicious fantasies.

"You see that?"

Carlisle pointed vigorously at Edward's groin with an expression of utter disgust on his face.

"That bloody creature is becoming hard! You like pain Edward? Well do you?"

His father's voice had become particularly condescending, sneering those words, spitting them out at his son. This was lying motionless on the floor, a distinct bulge in his pants that hurt him both physically and emotionally. For with every inch that his cock grew, his pride and self-respect shrank. The profound confusion dulled Edward's senses, but he could make out his enraged father towering high above him, the blond hair conspicuously lighted by a setting sun. As if he stood at the foot of an abandoned, ominous lighthouse. That analogy would have made him smile in every other circumstance. His mother was still sitting on the couch, but was now turned to Emmett, who had her in a tight embrace. She was shaking as her sobbing had progressed into downright crying. Emmett stared at him with a look of disgust. Jasper still stood at the window, motionless. There was no sign of Alice. The summer – his brief moment in paradise – was lost.


	2. Betrayal

**_For those who already started following or favorited the story, thanks! Your dedication means a lot to me!_**

_Warnings: Violence, angst, drama and some slashy bits (but nothing explicit)._

Thanks again to **Lineia** and **dantemalfoy** for comments!

**Reviews**** are loved!** Let me know what you like and don't like, then maybe I can do something about it in coming chapters :-)

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**Chapter 2: Betrayal**

"Get up."

The sudden demand startled Edward. Still paralyzed with anxiety, he disobeyed his father's command.

"Get up. I will _not_ ask you again Edward!"

He spat out his name as if it were a disease. Fearing that his father might kick him in the stomach, he extended his arms, leaning on them heavily, as he erected his upper body. His gaze he kept averted, looking down at the carpet. Additional wet spots had formed, amalgamating into one in close proximity of the stain of blood.

"Dad, mom…" he began weakly, still slumped on the floor. His father brutally interrupted him.

"Shut your mouth. You have no right to call us your parents."

Whatever mental processes had kept running during the beating had been ruthlessly shattered by that icy rebuttal. The hatred in his father's voice had been hard to miss. His mother's sobbing had suddenly stopped at that point. The abrupt halt of noise had caught Edward's attention and he lifted his gaze, to find his mother looking up from her paper tissue. She was eyeing her husband with a perplexed gaze of shock. But she did nothing.

Emmett was still staring incessantly at the carpet, nervously clenching his fists. His head had drooped even more, so that Edward was staring at the top of his head. His hair was impeccable. Styling gel held it to together in a neat kind of crest.

Edward's hair had been impeccable that morning too. Now it wasn't; it got all messed up when his father had harshly pushed him down into the dust.

Behind Emmett Edward saw Jasper. His brother, too, had jerked around and, his arms still loosely crossed, gazed at his father, stunned by the words he had heard just now. But he too, like his mother, did nothing.

And then he realized it. There they were: his family, minus Alice. They had abandoned him without leaving. No, what they had done was far worse: they had betrayed him. They had shown that unconditional love was not necessarily unconditional. All those years that they had lived in happiness – that his mother had called him "her love", "her sweetness", "her little treasure" – were shattered and were revealed to be the lie they had actually been. It smashed Edward's heart to smithereens, akin a vase crumbling to pieces after tumbling down onto the floor. Broken, feeling exhausted by a sudden pang of utter anguish, he looked up at his father, his mouth half open and tears now streaming down his cheeks. That sight didn't calm his father at all. Instead he kicked Edward in the stomach in a fit of rage.

"Damnit you disobedient rat! Get up as I told you to!" his father suddenly cried as his foot hit Edward just under his diaphragm, slinging Edward backward, coughing and gulping for air, landing with his head against the rim of the coffee table – of Danish design and very expensive. It now featured a spec of blood.

Edward slowly reached with a hand to the throbbing sensation coming from his head, lightly touching it before removing it again to be greeted by the gruelling sight of thick, dark-red blood – _his_ thick, dark-red blood, as he quickly realized.

The rest of the family sat motionless and eyeballed what happened before them, stunned by how their father and husband had kicked Edward hard enough so that he would injure his head against the furniture. Upon seeing the bloodied hand, Edward's eyes widened in horror; he fainted. Darkness enveloped him as his head collapsed down onto the floor.

The sun was setting on this warm, summer evening as Edward arrived at Gaya. He had told his family he had gone out to the cinema with some new friends of his; that way they wouldn't be able to call said friends if they started worrying about him coming home late. And he certainly hoped that would happen!

He walked up the steps to the bar's door, looking around suspiciously to make sure nobody he knew saw him. When he was sure that he was all alone, he pressed against the door and stepped inside. He was greeted by a smell of beer and it was very warm, even though it wasn't that crowded yet.

As he walked to the coat rack he took off his light summer coat, a gift from his parents for his graduation. Afterwards, he walked to the bar, noticing how the bartender was sizing him up when he brought him his beer. He paid and turned around, not really knowing what to do.

How does this work anyway? Should he just say hi to some people, or should he stand around, waiting for people to come up to him? He decided that for now he'd just pretend that he was busy texting somebody, taking a sip from his beer in the meantime, leaning against the bar while doing so. Of course that brought him nothing, and ten minutes later he dully looked at the clock. Seconds had turned into minutes. He had to change his game plan.

And right then, his heart started pounding in his chest. The door had opened, and in marched a few of the natives from the local reservation, all of them either in tank top or black V-necked T-shirt, several types of short, denim pants and running shoes. The cute bicycle boy walked proudly in front, as if to say

"_Tonight's fuck just arrived!"_

The other guys looked vaguely similar, all with the dark skin and black hair, though none of them was as appetizing as bicycle boy. Edward kept watching them intently, slowly sipping his beer the way a police officer eyes a suspicious character as he sips his take-away coffee from the safety of his police car. Currently they were just looking around, discussing who was going to buy the beer.

When suddenly bicycle boy gazed in his direction while one of the others seemingly pointed at him, Edward quickly ducked back into his fake text, nervously punching random buttons in order to ward off suspicion.

A few moments passed.

Then warmth had appeared beside him. Shyly he looked to his left… First he saw the Nike training shoes. Then he saw the muscular calves, and the short denim pants, with jagged edges. He continued to raise his gaze as his eyes met the smooth fabric of the tank top. His heart now racing, pounding in his throat like a drum, he saw the muscular forearms and upper arms, biceps and triceps flexing and relaxing as the hotness counted cash and handed it over, then took the beers. The neck featured a conspicuous Adams Apple – that sign of delicious manhood – which was framed by two _very_ conspicuous muscles – the sternocleidomastoid muscles. _God_ how Edward loved those muscles! They were eternally expressive, and to see them flex as the head moved made his mouth water.

Finally, the face came into view… and it wasn't him. It was one of the others. Feeling disappointed and utterly deflated, he returned his gaze to his mobile phone.

"Hey Jake!"

"What?!"

"Here's your beer, get it while it's cold! And you owe me two dollars."

Sounds of kissing to his left vaguely disturbed Edward's fake texting routine, and as he glanced back to where the unknown native stood, he saw how bicycle boy had appeared and had firmly attached himself to the guy that had bought the beers. It looked glorious, but a pang of jealousy made him growl under his breath.

After what seemed like eternity, bicycle boy, who was apparently called "Jake", let loose, a mischievous grin on his face.

"How about that, do I still owe you a debt?"

"Yeah you do, but thanks for that" was the reply, as both of them walked over to a table where the other natives had gotten seated. Edward kept following them, still leaned against the bar, but mobile stowed away in his pocket and arms folded.

A sudden confusion suddenly broke out amongst the two natives before they had managed to reach the table. Edward tried to listen in but the music made it somewhat impossible. Their movements were more meaningful, as they were staring at the floor and looking in pockets.

_They must have lost something._

He glanced to his left and saw what it could have been: on the bar lay a leather wallet. It was nothing much; it looked old, coins having left indentations on the exterior. He picked it up and turned it around. Not just coins had left their mark; a seemingly hollow ring announced the presence of a condom.

The wallet in his hand, he looked back to where the natives had been searching. They were still there, with the beer-buying guy now on all fours to scan the bar's floor. Jake on the other hand had moved in Edward's direction. Suddenly he turned around to his friends, shouting something at them that he couldn't make out, but which ended up in him coming straight at Edward. Nervously, Edward hid the wallet right behind him, quickly jerking back into position as the beautiful native appeared by his side.

He signalled for the bartender, who made clear that he'd be coming in a minute. The bar's lights shown beautifully on Jake's dark hair, making it glisten. As he swivelled his head and shifted his gaze from one end of the bar to the other, he could see the muscles in his neck flex and relax. Edward felt like biting, but managed to refrain from doing so. Instead he leaned over to him.

"H-hey!", he stammered.

_Great, I sound like some stammering fool_.

Still, stammering or not, he had attracted the native's attention. This eyed him candidly as he shifted his balance from one leg to another, the right corner of his mouth curled into a vague smile and eyes opened wide and welcoming. His gaze travelled to Edward's shoes and up again in a matter of a second, but it was still utterly noticeable. Clearly Edward was being checked out. Jake's smile broadened as the left corner of his mouth now also curled.

"Hey man, you knew here?"

"Yeah, sort of."

That wasn't really true, but who cares. Edward had come to this place once before about three weeks ago, not including the night with his two siblings. It had been a Thursday, and the place had been rather quiet, to his annoyance.

The music changed from a loud pop-song to something calmer. Meanwhile Jake had shifted his gaze back to the bartender as he waited for him to come and help him. Fearing he had lost his attention, Edward broke the silence between them.

"You're Jake, right? I heard one of your mates call you. You uh… repaid him handsomely. Are really all of you natives gay, or what?" he said, cocking his chin in the direction of Jake's mates, who were talking amicably at one of the tables.

Jake chuckled briefly, exposing his perfectly white teeth as his head slanted backwards; the muscles in his neck flexed under the load, making them even more conspicuous. Edward's hands became sweaty trying to stay cool.

Still chuckling, Jake glanced back at Edward, the teeth still exposed. His smile was warm and welcoming; it made his face shine with cute boyishness. Definitely worth biting.

"Yeah, they call me Jake. My full name is Jacob though. And no, we're not all gay, mostly just me."

He smirked as he curiously eyed Edward, again shooting a gaze down to Edward's groin and back up to his face, his hair, his chest and arms, and back to his face. Edward stared into Jacob's eyes intently as he felt Jacob's penetrating look all over him.

"What's your name then?" he finally asked, cocking his chin at Edward as he spoke the words.

"Edward, pleased to meet you", Edward responded. "Are you from that local reservation?"

"Yeah, I am, ever been there?"

Here Edward felt conflicted. It was quite normal for the inhabitants of Forks to wander off into the reservation now and then for some R&R, but he had never done so because his parents had forbidden him to.

"No", he answered, ducking Jacob's radiant look but keeping watch of the expression on his face from the corner of his eye. Jacob was obviously taken aback a bit, as his smile faded away ever so slightly.

"Oh? Why not, it's a nice place! You should come along next time when we go cliff jumping. You do like cliff jumping, right?" The smile had returned in all of its warmth.

Edward was dumbstruck. Had this robust native just asked him out?

"You sure?" he asked, as if Jacob had made some kind of mistake. Confusion could have been read all over Edward's face. Truth be told, the idea of jumping from a cliff terrified Edward, but if it would get him close to Jacob, he might have to try it…

Jacob chuckled again, exposing those white teeth in all their shiny brilliance. Edward felt how he was already falling hard for him, both emotionally and physically. The urge to bite his neck grew, as did some body parts.

"Yeah I'm sure, it'll be fun!"

The bartender finally appeared, so that Jacob's attention was pulled away from Edward. The latter stared at the muscles of Jacob's neck flexing as the head smoothly turned so that his eyes met the bartender's gaze. The rest of his body soon followed the swivelling of his head as he repositioned his muscular arms to lean on them heavily as he directed his attention to the bartender. Edward vaguely saw Jacob's mouth move and he heard his voice as if it came from a faraway land, lost in the splendor of the broad shoulders he saw before him.

_Had any of the bartenders found a wallet?_

Jacob's question woke Edward up from his silent ruminations over Jacob's beauty as he remembered the wallet he had hidden behind his back. Quickly he took it out of its hiding place and prodded Jacob before the bartender could give an answer. Jacob looked at him with surprise, his mouth half open, but not in a smile; it looked more like vague confusion, as if his thoughts were still with the bartender. As soon as Edward magically held the wallet in front of his face, though, the light returned and the half-open mouth morphed into a surprised but pleasant smile.

"Where'd you get that?"

Edward smirked.

"Was just lying around on the bar… Is it yours?" he added innocently, knowing full well that it wasn't.

"No it isn't, it's my friend Embry's. He went to buy some beers and then lost it. Glad you found it though, thanks!" Jacob took the wallet from Edward's hand and started in the direction of his mates when he slowed his steps, lingered a bit before turning around and looking Edward straight in the eyes. He had a playful smirk on his face.

"It was nice meeting you, Ed… Don't mind if I call you Ed, right?

Edward could only grin and chuckle boyishly, while slowly shaking his head in delight of the liking the young native had seemingly taken to him. The response was another one of those pleasant teeth-exposing grins.

"You uh… come here often?" Jacob asked sheepishly.

"Yeah, I plan to, for sure…"

Jacob's smirk broadened a bit and his eyes twinkled with a boyish enthusiasm. He briefly looked down at his feet and then back at Edward as he momentarily scratched the back of his head, once again piercing his gaze with those beautiful, brown eyes.

"Well then. I come here pretty much every Friday. We uh… should stay in touch."

Jacob nodded briefly and winked, then turned around and walked off to his mates. Edward kept staring at him, watching how his cute ass and his broad shoulders wiggled to and fro in movements whose directions exactly countered each other as he walked away.

Edward had kept watching, leaning against the bar and sipping the last of his beer, as Jacob had sat down and had handed Embry his lost wallet, smiling. At Embry's visibly puzzled enthusiasm, he had pointed at Edward, and Embry had mouthed "_thank you_". And as their conversation had continued, Jacob had looked at Edward one last time, smiling broadly. He had cocked his chin at him, then licked his lips, winked one last time, and still smiling, had re-joined the conversation of his mates. It had been beautiful. His heart pounding strongly in his chest, he had felt invigorated. Whatever was to come in the future, Edward was looking forward to it!

"_Edward. Edward! Damn it, fucking kid._"

Edward lay motionless on the floor, his unresponsive body an ode to his father's careless rage. His head throbbed and his knees were hurting. Awoken by his name being called and a stinging pain that permeated his entire body, he opened his eyes. His blurred vision brought him back to reality: two blood-shot eyes about one meter away from his face. He remembered the kick, the injury to his head. The two eyes, set in the pale face that was his father's, instantly removed themselves from him.

_I must have fainted_.

Afraid for what might happen if he disobeyed his father any longer, he mustered all his strength, and erected himself. The dizziness and nausea he felt quickly pushed him back onto the ground as he stumbled and fell over. But he tried again. His fear to be beaten was stronger than the confusion and fatigue that dragged him back to the floor; _it had to be_. Slowly but steadily he got up and had a quick glance around, gaze ducked, shoulders tense in tight anticipation of the blow that he knew would come but hoped to prevent.


	3. A Cold Farewell

A _thank you_ to an unidentified guest, **sindhura** and **CullenBlack1986** for leaving reviews. **Your words were amazingly motivating!**

_Warnings: Violence, angst, drama, and just the tiniest bit of cute, romantic slashiness._

Again a _thank you_ to **Lineia** and **dantemalfoy** for providing comments!

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**Chapter 3: A Cold Farewell**

As Edward was standing there in the room, head drooped and shoulders hanging, he felt like the entire world was out to get him. All eyes in the room were on him. The piercing gazes of his family members made him feel mocked and insecure.

Alice had now also come down and was staring at him from the stairs, probably startled by the shriek her mother had let out when his head had hit the coffee table. But, she too had done nothing for him, and thus she was no better than the rest of the traitors that he had the undivided pleasure of calling his family. Alice had been crying; red eyes, cheeks and smudged mascara showed her self-pity.

_Hypocrite!_

Then his father set off in his direction. Edward, suddenly freaked out that he would be hit again, averted his face so as to not incur another hit on the chin. But that's not what happened; instead, he was roughly grabbed by the collar of his shirt and dragged along, so that he nearly fell on the floor as the collar momentarily squeezed his windpipe shut.

Now coughing, breathing forcefully as he gulped for air out of sheer panic, he was pulled out of the room, through the hallway, down the stairs and to the front door. It all happened so fast that he would later remember it only as a blur in which his mind was assaulted with thoughts of confused panic as he heard the click of the front door and felt the fresh air on his face as he was hurled down the steps.

Flailing wildly with his arms as he came down to the ground, his attempt at breaking the fall failed so that his face met the cold mud of the driveway. Unlike before, he didn't remain on the ground for long, attempting to get up instead. Now on all fours, panting from the sudden physical exertion, his pants torn at the knees and the knees scratched, he slowly erected himself and turned around. His father was standing at the top of the steps to the front door.

When he saw his son standing up, a flicker of hatred was enough to make him walk over to his son and give him one last, harsh slap in the face. The boy shuddered as a spiny tingle of pain launched itself down to his feet and up again, erupting in a burst of headache that made him cringe, stumble, and almost had him fall back to his knees. He kept his face averted and had his eyes shut, as if to show surrender; that he had been defeated. The submission repulsed his father.

"Don't _ever_ come back!", his father hissed at him.

He made his way back to the front door, walked up a few steps, and turned around. Edward had opened his eyes and had watched his father walk away from him, his heart aching with sorrow and self-disgust.

"But, father, please!" he started, but his father's eyes shot fire, and he snapped once again.

"Do _not_ call me your father, you sniveling little shit! You're an abomination! Do you have any idea what grief you caused your mother? Hideous and disgusting, that's what you are, certainly not a child of mine!"

He had started back in the direction of Edward, but had stopped short of the last step. Edward's lips were trembling again as panicky thoughts clouded his judgment. There had to be a way to salvage the situation, to make his father understand. He took a step in the direction of the front door.

"But father, please…"

Again he was interrupted as his father shouted several more insults at him, paced back inside and slammed the door shut with a bang that the entire county must have heard.

Edward was left to stand alone, outside, in the cold, a frigid winter evening, with only the clothing he was wearing. Hot tears of agonizing panic started streaming down Edward's cheeks as he fell down to his knees and buried his forehead in the mud, his arms over his head and his fists clenched tight in despair, rocking softly to and fro. His body shook under the weight of the sobs.

This evening he had lost everything but his life; a life that he didn't feel was worth living anymore anyway. Maybe… just maybe he ought to end it all. For how could he possibly have been so stupid… This evening needn't have happened! All of it just because of one stupid mistake; a rule he had set himself in the summer and that he had said he would never, _ever_ break.

He broke it. Last night.

He had gone to Gaya again, as always making sure family members hadn't followed him. When he was sure that wasn't the case, he sighed, took a deep breath, opened the door to the bar and stepped inside.

It had been roughly six weeks since he had seen Jacob. He had popped in on two more occasions, but had always been disappointed not to see the native. As he came in this time though, around 11PM, he shot a glance around the bar and felt his pulse quicken when he saw a familiar pair of Nike trainers sticking out from behind a wall that separated the main bar area with one of Gaya's smaller backrooms.

He nearly threw his jacket towards the coat rack, so impatient was he to see Jacob again, after which he paced towards the bar, got himself a drink and strode towards the wall from where the trainers were poking out around the corner.

Glass of beer in hand, he approached. His hands started to become sweaty and he felt his grip on the glass lessening, so he clenched it, nervously, hoping the glass wouldn't drop from his now slightly trembling hand.

He inched ever closer, not knowing what to expect. What if Jacob didn't recognize him anymore? What if he had misunderstood all of Jacob's flirtations? Why did Edward think himself so special anyway… Jake was pure hotness; he probably flirted with pretty much anything that he fancied, and had been fucking around like crazy in his absence. Why would such a hot guy fancy him? _Him_, Edward…

In the meantime he found himself standing about half a meter from the pair of trainers, still poking out from behind the wall. Edward stood there, silently, waiting to calm his nerves. He gulped, straightened his back, and hastily guzzled the beer, putting the empty glass on an empty, nearby table.

Suddenly the trainers retracted and disappeared. Edward looked at it with astonishment. He was so focused on those trainers that their disappearance almost abolished the reason to go check if it was Jacob. As if now there was no possibility that he could have ever been there in the first place.

His heart had skipped a beat when that happened, disappointed due to a sudden, unexplainable feeling of loss. But, then it skipped another beat, as hope flared up vigorously above the ashes of fire that consumed his heart. To Edward it came as of nowhere: he stood face-to-face with a rather handsome, young native.

Edward must have looked like he was staring at a ghost, eyeing the native with a stunned perplexity that seemed entirely out of place, for Edward vaguely recognized him from last time. His polished contours gave him a rather exquisite look in the dimmed lights of the bar, his elusive black hair lost against the dark background of the bar's weakly lighted backroom. He wore a black, V-necked shirt and shorts. The guy looked great. Not like Jacob, but very nice nonetheless.

"Hey, you're Ed right? The guy that found my wallet a few weeks ago."

The talking yanked Edward out of his silent contemplations regarding this young native's beauty. The vague smile that had formed on his face was wiped away as confusion set in.

"I uh… Yeah, erm…"

The native eyed him curiously, waiting for Edward's sputtering and stammering to stop.

"Yeah uh… Yeah, that'd be me. I uh… am Edward."

He reached out his hand, waiting for the native to reciprocate. He didn't have to wait long. The young native ignored the hand and pulled Edward into a hug, patting him on the back three times so hard, that it felt more like slapping than anything else. Edward was astonished. Finally, the native pulled back from his manly hug, and held Edward by the shoulders, staring into his eyes.

"I know, right? I'm beautiful. It's okay that it makes you speechless. It's a very common reaction people have to me," he said with a wide grin. The joking relaxed Edward somewhat and he managed a rather pained, uncomfortable smile. The native only chuckled lightly.

"My name is Embry. Pleased to see you again. I was about to get me and the guys some beers. You want one?"

"Yeah sure, thanks…" Edward replied, still a bit baffled by this surprise encounter. Though realistically it needn't have been very baffling: last time Jacob had been here, Embry had been there too. He and Jacob had shared a kiss, right next to Edward.

Embry walked over to the bar, drawing his wallet. Edward watched it intently while Embry's arm smoothly pulled it out of his pants and with a firm swat deposited it on the bar. The indentation of the condom was still there…

"I'm not going to lose it again, don't worry," Embry announced, grinning jokingly. He hadn't understood that this wasn't the reason Edward had looked at the wallet so closely, but he decided to let it slip. He barely knew the guy; to start about condoms and the amount of sex Embry might or might not have had didn't really seem like the best idea. Instead, he laughed meekly and walked over to Embry, resting his arms on the bar, leaning on them as he scanned the many strong drinks that were displayed behind it. Embry just watched Edward.

"We haven't seen you for a while. Been busy?" he inquired curiously. Edward repositioned himself to more comfortably look at Embry. His jaws looked nice. Jacob's were nicer.

"Yeah, I guess so," he replied. He didn't really want to start about his parents right now. "Had a lot of schoolwork…"

_Fuck, that was a stupid excuse! _He had forgotten that it was summer vacation right now. And indeed, Embry looked at him with a clouded smirk, but he had apparently decided to drop it.

"You been here often since I found you your wallet back?" Edward responded. Embry just chuckled lightly as he glanced back at the bar. The bartender had appeared in front of him. Embry ordered five beers, and waited for it to be delivered. Meanwhile, his gaze slid back to Edward.

"I've been here a couple of times, together with Jake and some of our mates from the reservation," he answered, but his voice darkened as he continued:

"It's always fun to watch Jake approach guys."

The candid smile that Embry had probably meant to adorn his young face sadly fell apart into a painful expression of optimistic agony. On top of that, that sentence had come out like a sigh, as if his voice was suddenly failing, and his head drooped as his gaze traveled from Edward to the bar and the wallet that lay in front of him. His eyes stood sad behind a veil of loose, black hair. Slowly he turned his gaze around to the back room, looking almost hopeful. Then he signed again and returned his attention to Edward, while straightening his back. Edward gazed back at him, suddenly blurting out the obvious question:

"Embry, are you gay?"

The question rudely yanked Embry from his quiet thoughts, as he fixed a surprised look on Edward. This felt bad instantly.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," he added apologetically. "It's just… I saw the imprint of the condom in your wallet. Jacob said none of you are gay except for him, but I have to ask: what straight guy takes condoms with him when he goes to a gay bar?"

Embry looked positively miserable at that remark. He buried his face in his head as his black hair loosely fell around his face, slowly massaging his forehead with his fingers. A pang of hurt caught Edward as he saw the young native suddenly so sorrowful. He awkwardly put an arm around Embry, tapping his back lightly. Embry quickly recovered and looked Edward straight in the eyes.

"I want no mention of this to anybody, and certainly not to Jake, okay?" His gaze was intense, taking Edward aback a bit.

_"Hey Embry, where's the beer!"_

Embry turned around sharply.

_"Coming!"_ he cried back.

He turned back to Edward.

"They are getting a bit rowdy over there. Come join us, but seriously, no word."

Edward nodded gravely as he took some of the beers and waited for Embry to put his wallet back in his pocket. Embry then took the remainder of the beers and together they walked to the backroom. Once there, the sight of Edward elicited some welcoming smiles and shouts from the natives. To his total delight, Jacob was there too. In turn, Jacob grinned warmly when he saw Edward step inside, which provoked an inelegant grin on Edward's face. He slid onto a chair.

Jacob looked very stylish that night. His black hair was styled into a neat crest, pointing forward. A V-necked, grey T-shirt fit tightly around Jacob's muscled body, so that his nipples were easily recognizable. Edward gulped at that sight and felt the palms of his hands itch, so much did he want to pinch those manly nipples. He could already hear Jacob yelping as he did it… A smirk formed on Edward's face.

When Jacob reached out for one of the beers, his strong arms getting ever more exposed as he stretched it out, grabbing the beer and reeling it in, Edward looked upon it with admiration. The shirt fit perfectly with his jeans, and he wore what looked like sturdy, light-brown hiking shoes.

A subtle but firm punch in his side, delivered to him by a very annoyed Embry, accompanied by a scowl, brought him back to reality. Jacob had been talking animatedly with Paul, and was thus oblivious to both Edward's staring and Embry's punching. Finally though, when all were sat at the table, Jacob let his gaze travel the table and all that were seated around it.

"I suppose a round of names is in order," he announced.

Pointing at each one of his mates, he called:

_"So that's Paul…"_

_"…Quil…"_

"…and _Embry, whom you already know."_

"Guys, this is Edward. He's the guy that found Embry's wallet back a few days ago." He grinned at Embry mockingly, who made a face in reply.

"Always the joker, eh Jake?" he retorted sarcastically, after which he glared at Edward briefly as if to say "_Play along, and no word!_" reaffirming his earlier warnings. It started to annoy Edward; two warnings weren't enough already? But he let it slip and decided to get to know the natives better. Jake _especially_, of course.

From that moment onward, time had progressed quite rapidly, with hours turning into minutes, and minutes turning into seconds. Slowly he got to know Jake and Embry's mates, as they laughed, cheered and drank together. They were all great people and they appeared to be loads of fun; by all means a _merry bunch_, as a schoolteacher of his sometimes said.

As he sat back in his chair and swallowed the last of his beer in quiet contemplation, he looked over his new friends and couldn't help but feel a pang of regret that his father had never allowed him to go to the reservation. His father had always been a particularly narrow-minded, religious zealot. Thus the tribe was a "_bunch of pagan heretics_", and gays were an "_abomination on mother earth to be wiped out like a piece of dog shit is flushed away by rain_."

His father was an extremist in that regard, though, and fortunately Edward had been lucky to meet lots of people that were both religious _and_ allowed Edward to live, regardless of his sexual orientation. Though they didn't know that he was gay, of course. He had always hidden it from pretty much everybody. People knowing would just lead to a greater risk of his family finding out. And if that were to happen… He shuddered at the thought, when he felt a warm hand slip around his back and a breath of warm air making the hairs in his neck stand upright with delight. A tingle of divinity shot up his spine at that sensation.

He looked around in surprise, and saw Jacob's welcoming grin just to the right of him, at the same level of his eyes. He had crouched down beside Edward as he had wrapped Edward's shoulders in his strong arm's embrace.

"You okay?" he asked, a subtle expression of worry just barely noticeable in his twinkling eyes, but still with an unwavering smile on his delectable face.

Edward nodded. "Yeah I'm fine, why"?

"Dunno, you seemed a bit lost in thought. Anyway, I was going to get us some more beers. Want to come along? Help carry it back?"

Jacob had meanwhile stood up from his crouching position and motioned with his head to the bar in that wonderfully cute way that he had done a few weeks ago, his manly chin playfully thrown about in the air as it pointed out destinations in space.

Edward didn't need long to nod in confirmation and stand up, inadvertently glancing at Embry in the process. This threw him a glare of such intensity that it would have successfully scared off a lion in mid-pursuit. It took Edward aback a bit, even though he really had no idea why Embry had taken such a frantic distaste of him so suddenly. But, frankly, Edward couldn't be bothered with it. He wanted to get closer to Jake, so that's what he was going to do.

Slightly nervous, though excited, Edward followed Jacob to the bar. Jacob had already made it there and had signaled for the bartender. Meanwhile he leaned against the bar, curiously eyeing Edward as he was approaching him.

"So I haven't seen you in a while. Where have you been?" He asked, a friendly smile making the corners of his mouth curl in that way that Edward found utterly adorable.

The question was a bit of a disarming one. While he had decided to lie to Embry, he thought he might as well be frank with Jacob. He wanted to get closer, and for as far as he had seen, honesty usually accelerated that process. Often enough had he witnessed people beating around the bush instead of just charging in, head-on. And while sometimes tact was the way to go, at other times just going for it proved to be the best way forward.

"Honestly, it's my parents," Edward started. Jacob lifted an eyebrow in surprise as his smile partly evaporated from his russet-colored face. "How so?" he asked.

Edward glanced at him from his leaning position, then shifted his gaze to the floor as he fidgeted with the zipper of his pull-over.

"They are very religious. Especially my father can be very adamant. He would never approve of me being here." Jacob nodded in understanding.

"So you have to sneak out with some kind of lame excuse?" he deduced from what Edward had told him. To that, Edward nodded in approval, content with Jacob's quick understanding.

_Not a dumb one, this one_, he though happily; a happiness that permeated his face – a smile had formed as he gazed down, still fidgeting with the zipper of his pull-over.

Jacob observed him inquisitively, as the bartender brought the first three beers. These he took, pushing himself away from the bar with the foot that had been placed against it.

"I'll be back in a sec, will just bring these to the guys," he said while starting in the direction of the backroom. Edward stayed behind and waited for the delivery of the last two beers, which were brought soon. He took them and also started in the direction of the backroom after having cursorily explained that Jacob would come back to pay.

As he started moving, however, Jacob had walked back briskly and laid a hand on Edward's thigh. The feeling of Jacob's warm hand melted Edward's flesh, so that he loosened his grasp of the beers, nearly dropping one of them. The slippage of the glass quickly brought him back to reality as he watched Jacob intently.

"Nah, let's hang at the bar for now. Unless you want to go back and sit down?" Jacob's question had sounded hesitant, as if he hoped Edward would not want to go back.

"Yeah, let's stay here for now," Edward said, only happy to comply and have some private time with Jacob. His answer was greeted by a dramatic widening of Jacob's grin, exposing those wonderful teeth of his. Edward had nearly forgotten their wonderful sight; their brilliance, as they shined in the dim lights of the bar.

"So where were we," Jacob continued their conversation.

"My father, the religious zealot…" Edward replied, sighing.

"Ah yeah," Jacob nodded and looked down at the floor, a bit at a loss for words.

"So that's why I haven't been here quite as often as I had hoped. And when I was here, you weren't…" Edward has raised his gaze to cross Jacob's, as they now stared at each other, leaning at the bar, beer in hand. Jacob took a sip.

"It's a pity, I would have like to stay more in touch. You still ought to come with us once, for the cliff jumping, remember?"

"We will certainly do that, except that my father will probably not allow it…" Edward's gaze went back to the floor as he drooped his head, ducking Jacob's gaze. Jacob reacted with a simple "_oh?_" in surprise to Edward's statement.

"Yeah, he says you are pagan heretics," Edward said as he managed to produce a hesitant and apologetic smile. At that statement Jacob's expression had changed to one of recognition. His nostrils flared up a little and an angered frown defiled the young native's face ever so slightly. A smile simply made his face so much more attractive…

"Ah, I see," he said, the words rolling out of his mouth with clear agitation. "You are one of the Cullen boys then, aren't you?" As if in thought he had raised an arm to his face and held the palm to his cheek, supporting the arm at the elbow with the other arm.

"Yes… yes I am," Edward reacted hesitantly, still ducking Edward's gaze.

He was aware of the bad blood between the tribe and his family. His father had at multiple occasions tried to get the tribe to relocate to Alaska by using the argument that the far north of the continent of North America had anyway been forgotten by God. The logic went that a Native American tribe defiling those lands would therefore not have an impact on the proper, decent people of the Americas – the whites – those chosen by god himself to act as a shepherd for God's flock and more of such crap. Edward had nothing against the believe in an almighty God to protect him when the going got tough, but his father's offending declarations went way too far for him.

Edward's gaze shifted back to Jacob's, who was now staring at his beer, lost in thought. He swiveled his torso so as to reach Jacob's right arm and gently laid down his hand on Jake's, waiting for him to raise his gaze. As expected, and with an expression of surprise, Jacob did just that. Soon their gazes were locked.

"Listen, I'm not like my father. He is a religious zealot and a creep, and I'm scared of what he can do… His religious mind is extreme and he will, upon finding me out, not hesitate to disown me. I'm sure of that. You have an ally in me Jake, you truly have."

Jacob's expression had relaxed from the earlier agitation, and he even managed a weak smile at those words. He put down his beer on the bar, the movement resulting in the loss of the physical connection between Jake and Edward – this to the slight disappointment of Edward.

But, the ice had been broken, and with the tension between the families laid bare and Edward's affirmation of Jacob's position (and thereby negating his father's position), the conversation resumed merrily. Edward had noticed that now and then Embry's head had poked around the corner of the doorway to the backroom. He was obviously not pleased, but Edward didn't care too much. He was now with Jake – that was all that mattered.

The conversation had been going for about half an hour when Edward started to feel around his pockets to grab his phone – it had vanished, much to his dismay. He looked at Jacob with an expression of worry and panic. "What?" Jacob inquired.

"I think I lost my phone…"

Jacob chuckled. "Don't worry, it's in the backroom. You took it out to message a friend of yours I think, but had forgotten to put it back in your pocket afterwards. It's fine."

Edward was relieved at the news. He looked back at the backroom, wondering whether he ought to go back and fetch it. He decided against it. Jacob had a phone too…

"What's the time?" Edward asked.

"Getting fed up with me?" Jacob responded, grinning jokingly.

"No, absolutely not..." Edward hastened to clarify, looking a bit concerned at Jacob. "No, was just curious…"

"It's alright, don't sweat. I was just joking," Jacob reacted, his calming voice soothing Edward somewhat. But, Edward _was _sweating. He was hitting it on with one of the most beautiful guys he had ever seen; he absolutely didn't want to fuck it up!

Jacob took out his phone from his pants' pocket, and pressed the power button to awake the screen so he could check the clock. The screen lit up, briefly hurting Edward's eyes as he stared at the bright, mirror-imaged iPhone screen in Jacob's firm, masculine hand, his fingers curled handsomely around the iPhone's edges. It was 1:58 A.M. Jacob put the phone back in his pocket, mischievously grinning at Edward.

"It's nearly 2A.M. You know what they say about 2A.M., right?" He slightly raised his eyebrows, the corners of his mouth curled into a smile.

Edward grinned and nodded. In unison they quoted _How I Met Your Mother_:

"_Nothing good happens after 2A.M._" and they chuckled gaily.

"We should probably go home; go to bed, before we… fuck things up," Edward remarked, a suggestive, playful smirk spread out over his face as he eyed Jacob's fantastically male jaws.

Jacob replied with a similarly playful smirk, as he leaned casually onto the bar with his right arm placed on it, his left hanging loosely, the hand causally tucked inside his pants' pocket.

"What's that Cullen? Do I hear you saying that you want to go to bed?" His grin broadened as he awaited Edward's answer, a roguish twinkle in his eyes. Edward, meanwhile, had noticed the fortuitous location of Jacob's arm.

He pulled Jacob's hand towards him, reeling him in slowly and steadily. If he hadn't wanted this, Jacob had every chance to escape Edward's grasp. But, soon he was close-by enough for Edward to put his other hand on Jake's firm ass, and pull him into an embrace that made both of them hot with anticipation, the sweat making their skins glimmer ever so slightly in the dusky bar's lights.

Holding each other, they stood in silent anticipation, a tension of passion permeating the air around them. Their breathing quieted and synchronized, as chests heaved in unison. Both their smirks and foolish grins had evaporated, revealing their boyish vulnerability. They held each other gently. Their eyes met when they raised their gazes concurrently. Time slowed to a standstill as all sound of the bar was drowned out.

"Yes…" Edward whispered.

Jacob gulped.

He heard the front door click open. Back in reality, a pang of relief made him look up as he saw his father throw him a pair of underwear, pants and a shirt. He then stood there, looking at his son, his flesh and blood, kneeled down in the mud, going crazy with desperate fear.

"Your mother wanted you to have that. But it is the final thing this family gives you – _ever_. Now get out. You're no longer welcome in this house."

He went back and was about to close the door when Edward started.

"You bastards! You sick-hearted bastards!" he screamed at the top of his voice, so that he was sure everybody in the house heard it. His father stood at the door, watching him, the door opened a mere two centimeters.

A pang of sorrow caused his rant to be interrupted abruptly as an agonized moan escaped his sore throat, but he regained himself quickly.

"You people are truly a bunch of cold ones!" Edward continued, still trying to scream as loudly as he could, but regretting the weak insult he had just produced. Surely he could come up with something better? He had to make sure his mother, sat in the living room, the treacherous bitch, would hear his agony, to make her shudder and shatter her heart.

"A bunch of cold-hearted bastards! Sending their son out when…"

Edward's voice gave way to his emotions, as he slumped back onto the cold earth and hot tears of sorrow flowed freely. His father shook his head in disgust and dissappointment, cursed under his breath, let the door go, and walked away. The door closed with a soft click.

And thus family life had ended for Edward: with a cold farewell.

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**A/N:** The next chapter will take a bit longer to write, so hang in there. It will come!


	4. Nothing Good Happens After 2AM

**A/N**: First of all I would like to thank those that newly started following or favourited this story, and I would like to thank **lovaboy, CullenBlack1986 and kitsunedango** for leaving a review! Your words and actions are appreciated! While I'm really enjoying writing this story, it's also really great to know that _others_ like the story too J

_Of course, please feel free to __**leave ever more reviews!**_

_Warnings: fewer angst and drama but __**lots of explicit (but rather mild) kinky slash**__! _Yes, finally the flashbacks are being tied up with the present (pun intended).

Thanks to **Jonathan** and **Lineia **for beta-ing, and **dantemalfoy** for providing additional comments!

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**Chapter 4: Nothing good happens after 2 A.M.**

It had started snowing. Edward lay still on the muddy driveway, limbs stretched out as he closed his eyes. The clothing his father had thrown at him lay in a shallow puddle in front of him. He had started shivering.

The sun had finally set completely, the dark night enveloping Edward as the cold air assaulted his tired body. His breathing grew quieter and calmer with every hot breath that left his flared nostrils, the water vapour condensing when it met the ice-cold air and circling up like smoke, until it was swept away by a frosty wind. He lay there on the cold earth, hurting and pained with the evening's dramatic events, but he felt at peace for the first time in a long while. Nobody was shouting, nobody was angry. Finally it was quiet, and he was left with his own thoughts. The silence, save for the weak rustling of leaves in the wind, was deafening. A weak smile appeared on his face.

In a way he was glad this had happened. Now people knew. He didn't have to hide in shadows, work behind everybody's back. It felt good being out, even if the consequences were dramatic… and at that thought it dawned on him full-force what had actually happened: he had been thrown out of his parents' house. He had been disowned. He was alone, outside, in the cold, with nothing but his clothes.

The smile that had appeared on his face faded away gradually as his cheeks, already red from the many tears that had found their way across them, were once again wetted with sorrow. All that remained was a pained expression of hurt. He started sobbing silently, bringing his clenched fists to his eyes to wipe away the new tears that were rolling down his cheeks.

He had nowhere to go, nobody to talk to. Except perhaps….

_Jacob_

His eyes widened as he thought of the guy that, in a way, had been at the centre of his life's collapse. It was not fair to blame him, though; Jacob didn't even know what had happened… if anybody was to blame, it was Edward himself; plain and simple. He had willingly ignored the one rule he should have never broken. Edward sighed – all that was now in the past. His best bet was to go to the reservation and find Jacob, explain what happened, and hope for the best.

Slowly he stood up, getting on all fours first as his back sighed under the physical exertion, his knees ached and his legs dreaded the load of Edward's body pressing down on them. Low on food, drink and energy, Edward started to feel slightly sick with dizziness as he straightened his body, supporting himself on the mud with his arms as he acquired a crouched position. Finally, he straightened his legs, and stood up.

He glanced at the clothing that lay in the puddle. They were partly covered in snow, making Edward wonder how long he had been lying on the driveway. Those clothes represented pretty much all he had at the moment. He grabbed them, folded them up without much regard for neatness, tucked them under his right arm and walked down the driveway.

As he came down the muddy road, he turned around to look at what he was leaving behind. He noticed his mother staring at him from behind a curtain, on the first floor of the house. She still held that bloody tissue to her face, fidgeting with it just below her left eye.

_If she is so sad about it, she should have done something to stop that psychopath_, was Edward's angry thought, as murderous intentions made his fist clench with vicious grief. A tear rolled down his cheek as he turned his gaze back to the driveway, his mouth twisted in anguish, and continued walking. Soon he was at the gate. He opened it, went through, closed it with a loud bang, and left.

It had been made clear to him: at that house there was nothing left for him. His future was now elsewhere.

He started walking along the road, hands firmly tucked into his pants' pockets, spare clothing still tucked safely under his arm, pressed against the body that was fiercely fighting off the cold night. He had started shivering vigorously, but he hardly noticed it, his thoughts drowning out all other sensations.

As he continued onwards, he mulled over the last eighteen hours of his old life, which had now been so abruptly terminated. His thoughts went back to 2A.M. He smiled too himself at the thought of Jacob's tender but strong grasp, his hair glimmering in the dusky bar's lights….

Holding each other, Edward and Jacob stood in silent anticipation, a tension of passion permeating the air around them. Their breathing quieted and synchronized, as chests heaved in unison. Both their smirks and foolish grins had evaporated, revealing their boyish vulnerability. They held each other gently. Their eyes met when they raised their gazes concurrently. Time slowed to a standstill as all sound of the bar was drowned out.

"Yes…" Edward whispered.

Jacob gulped, but a smile formed, gradually becoming warmer and more welcoming, until it was broad enough that his teeth were ever so slightly exposed, so that some of his white teeth were exposed. Silently they looked each other in the eyes as quiet beams of anticipation permeated their faces, a joyful twinkle making both their eyes sparkle. Lust now started filling their hearts as their smiles evaporated, the twinkle in their eyes becoming more aggressive, and Edward started to slowly pull their faces together. Jacob reciprocated. Their heads tilted into position in anticipation of what was going to come, mouths half open in expectation as their hot breaths mixed.

They kissed.

Edward lustfully breached Jacob's lips, who parted them with pleasure, granting Edward full access to the deliciously-tasting void that was Jacob's humid mouth. As Edward intruded with flaming force, Jacob pushed his tongue into Edward's mouth with equally fervent enthusiasm. Hands eagerly travelled up and down backs, along thighs, exploring the smooth curves and angles of muscular torsos, gripping and groping backs, necks and ass cheeks. Chests heaved faster and more excitedly as the tongue's movements became rasher with mounting passion.

Edward was in heaven.

Panting with sizzling fervour they disconnected, crazed entrancements on their faces and mouths still half open, moist and wanting more. Jacob stared at Edward greedily, who blushed from excitement. A smile adored his youthful face.

"To my car," Jacob whispered hoarsely, while gripping Edward's ass and pressing his groin against his own, so Edward could feel his bulge against Jacob's, making him stiffen even more.

Edward just nodded frantically as his eyes opened wide from the new sensation.

A subdued laughter came from the backroom, in response to which Jacob rolled his eyes quietly and sighed almost inaudibly. Edward looked over Edward's shoulder, to be greeted by two very wide grins, and one intense glare. Paul and Quil were shouting encouragements by now; Embry had slumped back behind the wall, sulking. But no attention could be paid to Embry now, whatever his problem was.

"Don't worry about them, they always do that. Bastards," Jacob whispered casually, but with an undertone of mild agitation. He frowned lightly.

"I don't care. Let's go," Edward responded, and pressed another kiss onto Jacob's lips. Their lips parted again, leaving Jacob grinning. Jacob's grin made Edward chuckle in response as he grabbed hold of Edward's ass firmly, turned him around and escorted him to the coat rack where they collected their jackets. Together they walked outside, into the cold, dark night. It was drizzling lightly.

As they stood in front of Gaya, again their bodies met in a tight embrace and frenzied kissing ensued.

Half kissing, half walking, stumbling as they went, they made it to Jacob's car. Their lips parted as Jacob hurriedly took the car keys out of his pocket and opened the doors of the car. Right then, Edward spoke.

"Jake, just one thing before we do this…."

He looked at Jacob awkwardly, as if pained to have to bring this up. Jacob stared at Edward, holding the door to his car's back seat in one hand, and pressing Edward's lower back tightly against his lower abdomen with the other. Edward's arms embraced Jacob's strong back.

"What is it?" Jacob asked with a slightly concerned tone of voice.

"Wherever we are going, I don't want to do anything within a mile radius of my parents' house. That's my only rule. I'm just way to scared tha –"

His words died away when Jacob had placed his index finger on Edward's lips.

"You have no reason to be afraid. Now get into the car," Jacob replied with an aggressive, nearly vicious undertone that yanked at all of Edward's primal instincts.

Needless to say, he didn't need to be told twice. He grabbed a tight grip of Jacob's collar, swivelled his torso around so that Jake was with his back to the car door, and jolted him into the car. He bounced onto the back seat, grinning in surprise, as Edward joined him. Edward nearly jumped onto him, mouth watering and a greedy lust filling his heart, like a starving lion launches itself onto an unsuspecting antelope. He sat heavily on Jacob's hot thighs as he closed the car door behind him with a bang, zipped open his coat and started unbuttoning his shirt. He did it rashly and with a hungered grin that made Jacob shudder, who did the same, his chest heaving with lustful drive.

Soon they were both half naked. Edward fell down on Jacob and kissed him passionately as his hands travelled up Jacob's arms, suddenly smacking them roughly against the car door and pressing them tightly against it, immobilizing Jacob's torso. At that point he broke off the kissing and licked his way along Jacob's muscular neck.

_Finally_, he thought, a ravenous impulse confounding his brain as he bit Jacob voraciously in the neck.

Jacob yelped in surprise, but ended it in a satisfied moan as Edward continued licking his way down to the nipples. These he sucked calmly, nuzzling them, and then bit them harshly, eliciting another pained moan from Jacob. But as the moan escaped Jacob's hoarse throat, frowns and grimaces were unmistakably interchanging with grins of delight, offering a confusing mix of expressions that made Edward smile – in his fantasies, that was _exactly_ the expression he saw on his victims' faces! In response, Edward continued licking and biting, changing from nipple to nipple, and when he felt like biting _really_ harshly, he went back to the neck.

"Oh god Edward, I can't believe you've never done this before…."

Jacob's husky voice was interrupted continuously by gruff moans and shrill whines that escaped his throat, as rushes of blissful agony continually assaulted his clouded brain. He struggled lightly with his arms, trying to free them from Edward's strong grasp as his nipples, neck, and now also his abs, were attacked by Edward's tongue and teeth.

But Jacob's struggling got more pronounced when Edward's teeth had firmly dug into one of the segments of Jake's appetizingly symmetrical abs. The whining became more incessant as Jake grimaced from the pain, lurching his head back, tensing the muscles of his neck so that they were hard as a rock.

Something else was also hard as a rock – something that Jacob had felt coming for a while now. His struggle became even wilder as a result.

"Oh Edward…."

Edward gazed up from his position, which was now around Jacob's happy trail.

"Please, my pants,"he said softly yet urgently with an ever-more hoarse voice, in-between gasps and a continual panting. The muscles of his face, neck and upper body incessantly tensed and relaxed when a new wave of painful salvation abolished Jacob's powers of reasoning.

Fortunately, Edward understood immediately what he was asked to do. He let go of Jacob's arms and, now travelling with his tongue back to Jacob's face, moved them down to Jacob's and his own pants' zippers.

While he licked his way up, biting a nipple as he ascended and taking another bite from Jake's neck – all of which resulted in yelps of pained ecstasy from Jacob – he fumbled with the button of Jacob's pants, and then his own. When he got them open, his tongue had reached Jacob's mouth. When the zippers of the pants were open, Edward and Jacob were again passionately kissing. And while they were still kissing, Jacob's hand had made its way to Edward's groin, and Edward had enclosed Jacob's cock in his one hand – the other he used to support himself on the back seat's backrest.

That last hand didn't stay in a supporting role for long, though. Edward managed to shift his balance thus, even while kissing and jerking off Jacob frantically, that he had gotten a renewed hold of Jacob's arm. He swung it above Jacob's head, as before. Contrary to before, he not only swatted it against the car's door, this time he also managed to grab a hold of the back seat's seatbelt.

He tugged on it firmly, while still passionately kissing Jacob, struggling against the divine feeling that came from his loins as Jacob was jerking him off, so as to not loose focus on what he was trying to accomplish with the seatbelt. The divinity complicated matters though – he was forced to release Jacob's throbbing limb. Instead he grasped Jacob's hand forcefully, so that he could tie the seatbelt around it with the other hand, thus restraining Jacob firmly. This moaned in increasing excitement.

"You like being restrained like that, eh? Jake?"

Jacob just moaned under the delight Edward was causing him. He held his eyes closed and his mouth was half open as he flailed with his head from side to side.

Edward repeated the procedure with the other hand, pulling Jake's arm away from his groin and restraining it with a seat belt from one of the front seats. Jacob moaned in happiness, eyes still closed as a vague smile of bliss permeated his face.

Making sure Jacob was firmly secured first, he then ascended with his body and took a strong hold of Jacob's hair, pulling his head upward. Jacob opened his eyes in moderate surprise, eyeing Edward as his groin closed in on him. A vague smirk curled the corners of his mouth when he understood what Edward wanted from him. He gazed at Edward's face, which had an almost animalistic expression of excitement smeared all over it. His tongue was stuck out slightly due to the physical exertion.

A blast of pleasure enveloped Edward's brain when he penetrated Jacob's oral cavity and Jacob started moving his head back and forth. Jacob's slow movements and the slight suction that he was applying felt better than anything Edward had ever done or tried. He moaned as levels of pleasure rose. Jacob moaned in affirmation.

"Faster Jake, faster!" Edward whispered animatedly, and Jacob happily complied.

But it wasn't fast enough.

Edward took a firm hold of Jacob's hair and rhythmically moved Jacob's head back and forth faster. Jacob whined softly, to which Edward answered by letting go of Jake's head with one hand, and letting it descend down Jacob's body, back to his forgotten cock. Jacob's whining was soon replaced with moans of pleasure.

As tension rose, Edward let loose of Jacob's head completely, now bucking full-force in Jacob's mouth. The unifying bliss that came from it was unimaginable. Tension kept rising as pleasure soared to new heights – at which point Edward released Jacob's mouth from the ravaging he had wreaked upon it. He disengaged and descended down Jacob's body slowly so he could stare Jacob in the eyes. They were twinkling with rebellious vigour.

The sight of Jacob's unwavering resolve set something of inside Edward's burning heart: he slapped Jacob across the face with a flat palm, producing a highly satisfying "swat" and a subdued yelp from Jacob.

The blow caused Jacob's head to be brutally flailed sideways, but he regained himself quickly. To Edward's amusement the rebellious sparkle had increased in intensity and Jacob was grinning broadly. It elicited a smirk from Edward.

"You're a rebel. I like that." Edward's smirk broadened. "The more you rebel, the more I will have to crush," he said as a fiery spark ignited not merely a twinkle, but a blazing fire of sadistic delight in Edward's dark eyes. His sneer had twisted into a grin that was infused with glee at the prospect of unleashing his fantasies on Jacob. Jacob gulped at the sight, but his grin had not faded one bit.

Edward let a hand snake down Jacob's body as he closed in on his face with his head, teeth bared. Out of nowhere, Edward plunged them into Jacob's soft neck, which was already richly scarred with bite-marks. The sudden searing pain had Jacob erupt in a howl that was disrupted when a tingling sensation of intimate pleasure launched from his hole to his by pain sensitized brain; Edward had started roughly fingering Jacob, sticking in multiple fingers, scissoring to prepare him for the grand finale.

Jacob struggled against his bonds: on the one hand the pain Edward's teeth caused him blinded him, making him wail with intensifying hurt; on the other hand the harsh fingering provided a jarring yet intoxicating delight that made Jacob weak and ground his defences to dust. He started panting due to the debilitating cocktail of antagonistic feelings assailing his increasingly submitting mind.

"Fuck me Ed," he iterated softly, grimacing in-between pained moans of gratification. "Fuck me **_now_**…."

Jacob spoke softly, but with a pressing urgencythat didn't leave Edward untouched.

He let go of Jacob's neck and slapped him harshly across the face with his free hand. The fingering continued with increasing intensity as more fingers were introduced. Jacob's facial expression kept shifting confusingly between grimaces, smirks and outright grins.

"Sure I will, but you're not in the position to make demands, boy!" was his softly spoken retaliation, meanwhile withdrawing some of the fingers that were so busy inside Jacob. Jacob answered Edward's slap and speech with a surprised smirk. Edward smacked him again.

"Take that smile off your face. You have no reason to smile. I'm going to fuck you into submission until you'll whimper and whine and squeal and howl,"Edward hissed threateningly.

Jacob lost the grin immediately, but his eyes twinkled with submissive delight upon hearing Edward's intimidating talk. The latter opened the door of the car, took a step outside, allowing him to brutally yank Jacob's pants and boxers off. It elicited a subdued yelp as some of the hairs of Jacob's legs were caught in the movement and got rudely torn out. Edward quickly climbed back in the car, closed the door, threw Jacob's jeans onto the driver's seat, and got into position. He parted Jacob's legs….

"Lube… next to the driver's seat…" Jacob managed to interject before Edward entered.

The comment had knocked Edward briefly out of his domineering role, as he gazed at Jacob, perplexed. Soon he regained himself, let his gaze shift to the space between the two front seats, and leaned over to search the crevice in-between the two chairs.

In the dark it was more difficult to find the tube of lube than Edward had hoped, but soon he held it in his hand and squirted some of the viscous gel onto both himself and Jacob. Jacob grinned as he was watching Edward's every move closely, his arms hanging loosely above his head, entangled in the car's seat belts.

As soon as Edward was done, he closed the cap of the tube and threw it casually back between the two front seats. He took his position again, manoeuvring himself gently in-between Jacob's strong legs. As he inched closer, his heartbeat quickened, until he found himself at exactly the right spot. He glanced over to Jacob's face briefly, licking his lips. Jacob was grinning in calm expectation – a grin that wouldn't stay there for very long.

"Get ready…" Edward proclaimed quietly, though with a bestial smirk that made Jacob tremble slightly in fear – it had been the first time that night that Jacob had become fearful.

Edward entered Jacob, steadily though somewhat forcefully. Jacob instantly cried out an agonized "Fuck", producing a pained howl that would have torn right through the hearts and minds of weaker individuals, as his muscles tensed up and his face locked into a tight grimace. Though Edward had prepared him somewhat, the force with which Edward had assailed his hole was of new proportions.

A continual soft, anguished whimpering now filled the car, pervaded by harsh moaning from Edward as he started pumping. Slowly and easily at first Edward went, but soon his bucking picked up speed. All Jacob could utter beside quiet moans were strings of "oh fuck" and "oh god" as Edward steadily increased the rate at which he fucked him.

The air in the car became hot and damp and the car's suspensions creaked noisily as the car rhythmically bounced back and forth along with Edward's frenzied movement. Beads of sweat dripped down his forehead, his mind shrouded by an animalistic drive while he groaned deeply. Jacob moaned in response, whimpering under Edward's primal fury, still grimacing and eyes shut tight.

As the pounding continued, Edward nudged closer and closer to that moment of bliss that would unify them in a rush of divine delight. Still restrained, Jacob wasn't far off either, as Edward noticed: his cock was hard and leaking; all he needed was to be brought a little further closer to the edge…

"Oh oh oh, I'm going to cum Ed!" he started whimpering suddenly, breaking off his normal routine of agonized moaning.

"No!" Edward retorted sadistically. "You're not going to cum until I say so! Just a little bit longer…."

Jacob's face tensed up entirely in an effort not to shoot before given permission by Edward, but this could see that Jacob was struggling hard against basic primal instincts. So Edward turned it up one notch, and bucked with a fiery force that he didn't even know he had in him. Surprised at his own stamina, he suddenly felt how his loins were enveloped in the precursors of that blessed blast of explosive ecstasy that consumes the mind akin a fiery conflagration. He was almost there…

_Just_

_A little_

_Bit_

_More…._

_"Cum now Jacob, cum now!"_ he hissed demandingly as he closed his eyes and threw his head backwards, letting his primitive spirit being overtaken by the full rush of heavenly perfection, extending an arm to gently stroke Jacob's erection. Their moaning joined in a choir of lustful anticipation as they were together pushed over the edge.

They came hard, simultaneously, their joined moaning erupting in a conflagration of united bliss. They groaned heavily, nearly crying with the feeling of ecstasy that had enveloped their loins and, like a locomotive gone rogue, rushed along their spine to squash their brain in mind-blowing delight. It was all as he had once, many months ago, imagined.

When it was all over, Edward slumped down onto Jacob. Their chests heaved frantically as they caught their breath, sweat mixing as their naked chests touched. Panting they stared at each other, still moaning softly, intermittently, each of them with a wide grin that portrayed ultimate satisfaction. Then Edward steadily slid out of Jacob, and slowly leaned over Jacob to untangle his arms from the seatbelts, freeing him. As he moved back to his former position, his face ducked down onto Jacob's, and once again they kissed passionately, fervently, happily. Gently. Then, Edward rolled over and leaned against the back seat's backrest. Again he glanced over to Jacob, who seemed to still be on a different planet, little stars swirling before his eyes. They sat like that for a few minutes.

"Wow," Jacob groaned. "Nobody ever fucked me like that… I've never been with a man that could _truly_ dominate. _You_, Edward Cullen, are going to see much more of me; like it or not."

Upon hearing that, Edward's heartbeat had once again quickened. In the meantime Jacob had taken a towel that was comfortably lying under the driver's seat to wipe the cum off of his magnificent set of abs. He glanced over to Edward with a smile. Jacob then took his pants and underwear and put them on again. Edward followed his example, putting on his shirt and coat, even though he was amazingly warm.

After a few moments, they were once again dressed and ready to go. They got out of the car, walked over to the front doors and opened them. As they slid into their seats, Jacob in the driver's seat, they exchanged a smile; it quickly grew into another grin, and soon Jacob pulled Edward into another kiss. Finally they disconnected, Jacob started the engine, and they drove off to Edward's house. It was nearly 3:30 A.M.

Soon they reached Edward's home, where Jacob pulled over along the curb.

"I believe this is your stop," Jacob said, with a sigh of regret.

Edward nodded in reply. Sighing also, he opened the car door, but before he got out Jacob pulled him in again, giving him a note.

"That's my phone number. Call me." Jacob added a nod in affirmation of the gesture.

Edward smiled and nodded briefly as he accepted the piece of paper, then resumed to re-open the door and got out. Outside, he slammed the door shut and walked over to the other side. Jacob lowered his window while he watched Edward walk around the front of the car to his side. Edward crouched down, supporting himself on the windowsill of the car as he grinned at Jacob warmly, a satisfied sparkle in his eyes.

While Edward stood with his back to his family's home, fixed on the beauty in front of him, a light had been turned on in the house. A dark figure appeared in front of the window, but Edward and Jacob were oblivious to it.

"I had a great night, Jake…" Edward began, but didn't continue. Jacob had pushed Edward back and had opened the door.

The figure in front of the window held a hand to the chin, cupping it, seemingly lost in thought.

In surprise to Jacob's action, Edward had taken a few steps back as he saw the magnificent body of the young native step out of the car in all its entrancing masculinity. His brown, leather jacket fit so well with the rest of his clothing, his face and hair, that Edward felt a novel bulge appear in his pants in response to the male stepping in his direction.

The figure in front of the window kept staring at the two youngsters, curious as to what would happen.

Jacob approached Edward, and finally stood right in front of him.

"I felt a hug was more appropriate, given how the evening proceeded," Jacob responded with a warm smile.

Agreeing to that proposition, Edward immediately reeled Jacob in, who was pleasantly surprised by Edward's continuing dominance throughout the evening. Edward tightly held his arms around Jacob, who reciprocated the gesture, as they rested their heads on each other's shoulders, seeking warmth and shelter from the cold winter night in each other's embrace.

The figure in the window had slowly lowered the loosely clenched fist, in surprise to the spectacle that was unfolding in front of the house. The figure leaned forward, supporting the body on the windowsill and eyes fixed on Edward.

Having stood there like that for a minute, they released their grips slightly, enabling them to pull back and stare each other lovingly in the eyes. Their gazes locked, chests heaving in unison. Calmness pervaded the scene. Edward slightly lowered his gaze, so that he focused on Jake's strong jaws.

"Earlier I said I didn't want to break this rule, out of fear," Edward whispered shyly to Jacob, "but I'm not afraid any longer. I choose a perfect ending to a perfect night."

He raised his gaze and locked it in Jacob's. Faces moved closer. Heads tilted into position. Mouths opened in expectation, damp with anticipation….

Behind a window, a fist clenched ever more tightly….

They kissed. A final, passionate kiss. The perfect ending to a perfect night. Tongues played around like young wolves in a damp cave, toying around foolishly. Then they disconnected, and stared at each other one more time in the eyes. Finally, their grips loosened as Jacob took a step backward, got into his car and slammed the door shut. Through the open window, he smiled, and Edward smiled back. Jacob winked, focused his attention on the road, put the car into gear, and softly road off into the night. Edward was left behind, still in a dreamy entrancement as he watched the two, red car lights disappear around the corner.

Finally he turned around.

And saw a figure behind a window, in a brightly-lit room; a room that he had always dreaded: his father's study.

The figure stared at him, and Edward stared back. The figure's hand slowly reached to the edge of the curtain, yanking it open with a firm tug. Carlisle, his loving father, appeared from behind it, eyes blood-shot. A crazed expression of disgust, disappointment and humiliation could be read all over his face. Edward saw his head droop. He moved away from the window. The light was turned off.

Silence.

Edward gulped, turned around, and paced away hurriedly. He would come back in the afternoon, when he knew half of his family would be away. What he would do until then he didn't know; walk around in the forest? Sit in a bar? He'd find something to do. And then in the evening, when the family returned home for dinner, he would have to explain. In the meantime, his father no doubt would have told everybody what he had seen that night. His loving, homophobic father.

As he continued down the road, he couldn't do but think of the sentence that had kick-started the night. The perfect night with the perfect end – the perfect end to life as he had come to know it.

_Nothing good happens after 2A.M._

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**A/N**: Chapter 5 is on the way, _hopefully _to be published sometime next week.


	5. The Long Road

**A/N**: First of all I should apologize for the delay. It's true that I never promised to update more often than once in two weeks, but I would have certainly liked to. Real-life happened: an essay was due last Friday, so that had to be written first. With that now over though, I can get back to ACF.

Note that this chapter is a bit different. You might hate it, you might love it; tell me what you think of it in a review, because, as always_, __**reviews are most welcome!**_

Further, I thank **CullenBlack1986**, **Lineia** and **petereed** for their reviews! They are very much appreciated! I also thank those that added the story to their list of favourites or started following this story.

Finally, as ever, a "thank you" to **dantemalfoy, Jonathan and Lineia** for beta-ing and providing comments.

_Warnings: Angst, drama, mild erotica and slashy/kinky fantasies._

* * *

**Chapter 5: The long road**

_"Hope, it is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and your greatest weakness." _– The Architect (From The Matrix: Reloaded)

Edward kept trudging along the road, thoughts milling around angrily in his tired head. Fact is he didn't really know where he was going. After all, he had never tried to go to the reservation before, knowing that if his father found out, he would nail him to floor. The dark night and overall lack of streetlights didn't make his search much easier. And thus he stumbled onwards down the long road; hungry, thirsty, cold and tired.

His shivering had slowly subsided. With every step he took, he sunk more and more into his memories of the past few months. His summer had been a whirlwind of discoveries, all culminating in that fateful evening with that beautiful, young native: Jacob.

_Jacob_

The name and the thought of that body brought a weak smile to Edward's face. He paused for a moment as he stared up at the clouds, snowflakes collecting on his eyebrows as he gazed at the dark night sky. Edward didn't feel the cold snow that was blanketing his face, though. He didn't see the clouds from which the snow was falling, nor did he see the darkness of the night that enveloped those clouds. Edward had closed his eyes as soon as he had tilted his face upwards, spreading his arms, like he had done a few months ago when he and his siblings had left Gaya. He had gazed at the setting sun and welcomed its endless warmth, his eyes closed and his arms spread, as if to soak up the rays of warmth. A tingling sensation of relaxation permeated his muscles.

He wasn't at Gaya now. He was standing along a road, at night. His muscles weren't relaxing in the rays of a warm, summer sun in the last hour of its trek along the North American skies. No, his muscles were cold and cramped. The tingling sensation Edward felt was not of relaxation, but of pain. Soon Edward retracted his arms, letting them fall and hang loosely along his body, his head drooping down. The snow that had accumulated on his eyebrows fell off his face and landed in front of his feet, to mix into anonymity with the snow that had gathered at his feet.

He continued walking. There really wasn't anything else he could do. Realizing the spare clothing tucked under his arm, he decided to take out the shirt and put it on. Two layers were warmer than one layer, after all. And so he did, carefully buttoning his shirt from bottom to top as, once upon a time, his father had shown him.

After having walked for about a mile, he finally reached a sign. Apparently he was going somewhat in the right direction: a big arrow pointing upwards and the name of the reservation in big white letters on a green background signalled his destination was up ahead. Unfortunately it didn't give an estimate of the distance. Edward assumed it couldn't be more than a few miles away, but even that meant he would be walking for a while. So he kept going – after all, there wasn't much else to do.

As he stumbled along, leaving the sign behind him, his mind returned to its earlier ruminations. Of all discoveries of those last few months, yesterday night's experience was the most intriguing and satisfying, and in more ways than one. Before he had always looked at men and wondered how it would be to do them. Everything had been purely theoretical; his fantasies were a fabrication of his teenage mind; every self-made orgasm an ill-equipped replacement for the real thing. Now he had finally done it.

For real.

Edward was amazed by how it had felt. How it had been to fuck a guy. It truly was the most intimate connection he could imagine with another human being. A smile wriggled itself onto Edward's face when he thought back at how it had all gone down, starting with the kissing at the bar. How Jacob had nudged him to the coat rack and out the door, under the cheering of his native mates. How they stumbled to the car, wildly groping each other….

Edward sighed. He remembered painfully well how he had launched Jacob into that metal piece of shit that he'd called "his car". Jacob's surprised smirk, as he landed onto the soft yet torn back seat, had been etched into his brain with a smouldering iron. His smirk had broadened when he had climbed onto Jacob and closed the door behind them, so that they were completely on their own, cut off from the world – disconnected from the hate, the prejudice and loathing that frequently came their way; _his _way. In that car, there was no father. There was no mother. There were no siblings; no homophobic family of any kind. And he had felt free. Finally, for the first time in his life….

He had felt _free_.

Edward shuddered as the notion dawned on him that during that time, on that cramped back seat, he had been able to enjoy being who he really was. The shackles on his mind loosened, his animal had been released; an animal that had murkily walked the lining of its cage, slowly growing mad with the torture of not being let out. It grew desperate, launching itself at the bars of its small prison, hoping to fight its way out. It never succeeded.

And now, the door to its cage had been opened. The animal, shy at first, had peaked outside. The sunlight stung its eyes, still used to the dark interior of captivity. It had sniffed the air. Carefully, it stuck its head out and looked around. One paw was placed on the cold earth, and when it became clear that this was not a joke, it hungrily launched outside, and sank his claws into the delightful flesh of man.

The delightful flesh of Jacob.

And so he was back in that car, kissing Jacob voraciously, penetrating his mouth with his famished tongue. Jacob had more than reciprocated, fuelling Edward's lust, lighting up his fire until it became a blaze.

In that blaze, the animal took control. Edward smirked at the recollection of tangling Jacob's hands in the seat belt, slapping him harshly in the face and threatening him with pain if he dared to rebel against his rule. He had loved to hold Jacob roughly by the hair and force him to suck him off with increasing speed; then face fuck him so that his throbbing limb painfully thumped against the back wall of Jacob's warm and moist little mouth. He had adored Jacob's pained whine and the grimaces on his face as he bit him harshly all over his body.

Edward distinctly remembered Jacob's groaning, moaning and whining. The meagre whimpering that he had produced when Edward fingered him in a painful yet blissful way had made Edward harder than anything he had done before. Seeing how Jacob suffered under his rough hand had been the thrill of a lifetime – a thrill he wasn't prepared to give up on anytime soon. He felt how his heart burned in his chest with a growing desire to keep doing this; to keep paining people for his and their sexual pleasure.

A smile broke the clouds on Edward's face as he recalled how Jacob's body had shuddered with an exquisite kind of delightful pain as Edward had penetrated him. The fingering had prepared Jacob's hole, hot for attention, but he had made sure to surprise Jacob when he slid into him, the cold lube sensitizing Jacob's entrance as he had agonizingly moaned under the pressure of Edward's well-endowed body.

What he had enjoyed most of all in that fucking frenzy might not have been the actual fucking itself, though. For before Edward had actually entered him, Jacob had looked at him intensely, softly gulping at the expectation of pain that was about to shoot up to his delirious mind. His rebellious grin had disappeared at that point. He was breezing quietly, but he wasn't relaxed. His muscles were tense, as if he prepared himself; nay _braced_ himself for impact.

His eyes had been especially revealing: they had sent the signal that had truly gotten Edward going. Because when Edward stared into those deep, brown eyes, he saw submission. A deep wish for Edward to recognize that he, Jacob, was prepared to do anything to make Edward happy, including endure the pain that Edward's sadism would bring upon him. When Jacob had looked at him like that both their cocks had been hard, and were twitching with an unadulterated excitement.

However, it wasn't only this deep wish to fully submit to Edward and relinquish _all control_ that Edward had seen in Jacob's glistening eyes. It had been submission and something else; something that had newly appeared in Jacob's expression. Edward had recognized it immediately, and he had felt his cock twitch from sadistic pleasure upon seeing that something in Jacob's eyes: _fear_. Jacob's submissive sparkle had intertwined with a flash of angst that made Edward only _more_ determined to fuck Jacob's brains out. At the end of it, Edward had proclaimed to himself, _submissive_ _fear_ was the only thing that he wanted to see in those eyes.

Edward smiled to himself when he remembered the fearful void in those eyes when they both had come, panting and content with the whirlwind of emotions that had blasted through their brains.

As Edward's thoughts pulled him through the memories, he could feel how he had become hard once again. He looked around nervously, but all was silent. The road was completely deserted, save for the snow crowding the black tarmac. He then descended down the side of the road, into the forest and found himself a sheltered spot behind some bushes, next to a large pine tree. Even though he had started shivering again, he sat down on the cold earth, and rashly unbuttoned his pants, opening his zipper with a desperate yank. He slid a hand inside.

He leaned against the tree trunk as he caressed himself, his head thrown backward against the tree. His eyes were closed and his mouth involuntarily opened when his mind reran through the events of last night. He groped himself ever harder, jerking off with increasing speed as his excited mind relived the memories. As he went further down the path of relief, he gripped his sac with his other hand, which until then had been uselessly lying on the ground, and caused himself a twinge of pain as he gently squeezed his balls.

So Edward sat in the forest, the cold night trying to battle its way back into Edward's thoughts. Alas, they were too hot; the icy frost melted as it touched the fiery memories, fuelled by the burning passion of the guys featuring in them. Their joined physical forms rocked back and forth, enveloped by the squeaking of the rickety car. They were oblivious to it. All they heard was each other's moaning, groaning, whining, and the thumping of an excited heartbeat that was spurred into the next gear by the fervent fire that blazed through their intoxicated minds.

Edward came with a soft groan and remained panting against the tree trunk, the memories fading away again in the dark depth of his mind, allowing the night to sneak back in. Edward shuddered. He cleaned himself as best he could, closed the zipper and buttoned his pants. He stood up, and went back to the road, to continue on his way: continue forward, so that he could go back to Jacob and relive his memories for real.

As much as Edward had loved dominating Jacob and had had the feeling that he was expressing some of his deepest desires, there was something a bit off-putting, even troubling, in all of it. He had always known himself as the nice kid from the villa; the kid that was at school on time, that cooked dinner once a week, that went to art class, that did his homework to the best of his abilities and always tried to be friendly to everybody.

And here he suddenly was: wilfully causing pain to this beautiful human being. No, in a way it was worse: it wasn't just wilfully causing pain; it actually _aroused_ him too! It had felt unnervingly good, unnervingly _great_ even. By all means, Edward had never in his life enjoyed something so much! The appetizing fear in Jacob's eyes had given him a raging hard-on.

No doubt that he was expressing his deepest desires. It had felt natural: an ancient, intensely primal feeling which he seemingly knew extremely well and fit him like a glove, as if he was reunited with a great friend – yet they were desires that he was blatantly unaware of. Even if they felt ancient and like they belonged to him like nothing else, he had never felt them before, nor known of their existence. Since when did he love causing pain so much? Since when did he long to dominate like that? Where had this dark side suddenly come from?

_How did I become such a… sadist?_

People always say that a lot of our behaviours originate in the way we were brought up. If that were true, then this tendency for sadism had come from somewhere, though he was at a loss for its precise origin. Really, his childhood had been good, all things considered. The only thing that he might not have always agreed with was….

His father.

Edward clenched his fists in his pockets with anger when the image of the pale face with the bloodshot eyes appeared before him. He thought back to the activities in Jacob's car. Yes, Edward had loved the domination. It felt like a life-long wish had finally been fulfilled, an eternal yearning and lust for power satisfied – a power to give commands, make demands, and punish if they weren't satisfactorily met. And punishing was the best of all. Oh, all the things he could have done to Jacob….

Edward became hard again as he fantasised about the locations and strengths of slapping, smacking, hitting, beating, whipping, and flogging that he could have subjected Jacob to, though he hadn't done any of it that night. For one, Edward didn't have any of these toys or tools besides his own, human hands, let alone have any of such toys with him that night. Really, it was only during that night that Edward had found out about the extent of his sadistic tendencies and had started thinking about it.

But, Jacob had also been a good boy. He really hadn't had much reason to punish him. With some luck, he wouldn't be good next time, in which case Edward would be able to do to him whatever he so desired. He could already hear Jacob's yelp and the sound of a whip on Jake's tight ass as he hit him roughly. He lustfully licked his lips at the prospect, the thought provoking a sadistic grin. First, though, he would need to fancy himself some toys.

That is, if there were to be a next time.

The thought catapulted Edward back into his misery, as the veil of fantasies was suddenly lifted and he found himself along the night-covered road to the reservation.

_There must be a next time._

Edward sighed. In that car, _he_, _Edward_, had been in control; not his father, with his multitude of religious views that systematically cut Edward off from anything and everything he truly cared about. Was that it then? Had his father's all-encompassing control of his life and being set the stage for his sadistic stirrings and domineering demeanour?

What did this mean? Had his father inadvertently turned him into a domineering sadist? Hadn't he really always been like that, in a sense? He distinctly remembered the delight of tearing wings of insects, or how he used to smash every plant he came across when he and his parents went out for a walk in the forest, back when he was just a toddler. No, he had always had the seed of sadism sown inside him, just waiting to sprout and grow into a full-grown plant, rich with thorns. However, his father had been the one to water the seeds, to nurture them with fertilizer and tend them lovingly, come spring, summer, autumn or winter. He had always been there, ready for them to sprout.

_Father_

His thoughts trailed off to more pleasant memories with the family, which didn't help to set his mood straight. He breathed heavily as he continued his walk until finally he stopped, took a deep breath, and continued. For now he would wash away, or at least restrain the thoughts about his parents. He would deal with them later, after he'd sorted out things and got himself a place to stay, even if only for a short while. The same went for the troubling thoughts regarding his domineering and sadistic desires: under lock and key they all went.

_Jacob under lock and key…_ Edward thought, and couldn't help but smile. Realizing how his thoughts went astray again, he regained himself and focused on the long road in front of him.

The snowing had become lighter and a few clouds seemingly dispersed. Some weak, flickering lights appeared in the murky night sky. Edward gazed up at them. The stars. It was soothing that behind all the grey misery that rained down upon him there was also beauty. It gave him some hope as he glanced back at the long road before him, empty, wet and cold. Perhaps at the end of that long road was also a light – small and flickering, like a candle in the wind, but still a light.

_"Hope, it is the quintessential human delusion…."_

The words of the Architect, the grand master of the Matrix, echoed in his head.

_"…simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and your greatest weakness."_

Edward couldn't do but feel that the guy was right. Here he was, hungry, thirsty and cold, trekking to a place he had never been at, just to find the guy with whom he had had some amazing sex – and for what? He didn't really know Jacob. He knew he was a flirt, that he liked to be dominated, and that he lived on the reservation; that was pretty much it. He didn't even know what to ask from Jacob. A place to stay? Another fuck? The fragile candle, flickering in the wind, seemed entirely out of reach to him.

And still.

Without hope Edward might as well end it all, like he had already thought he might do when he was lying on his parents' driveway. Perhaps, that's what he ought to do…. He didn't even really remember why he had stood up anyway, back when he was on his parents' driveway. He had imagined some misplaced feelings of affection for Jacob, a misleading glimmer of hope that he could help him out of this shit. Could he really do that though?

Edward slowly considered the question. It hit him that this point was a lot better than he first had thought; for what _could_ Jacob in fact do for him? After all, he was just another high school kid – though a _very_ well built one, there was no denying that. That was it though.

Edward had a hard time coming up with anything that would make Jacob a suitable candidate to ask for help. Really, he wasn't even a good friend of his. Come to think of it, he really didn't have any close friends at all…. His father's control and religious zealotry had managed to keep people somewhat at a distance from the Cullen family, and so Edward had to be content with just that: his family.

How ironic: the only thing he had was his family and endless libido, it seemed. The first one he lost forever, the second couldn't buy him clothing, food….

Or could it?

Edward shook his head, as if to try and fling the notion out of his head. He was definitely _not_ going down that road. Homeless and hungry as he was, he still maintained his pride and self-respect; he wasn't about to sell his body to stay alive. Even if that thought was quickly disposed of, it didn't answer another question: what did he have in life, except for… his life?

If he were to end his life, what would he lose? For all he knew, there really wasn't that much to lose further, at this point. His family probably wouldn't miss him. From what he gathered, he was already dead to them anyway, and since he didn't have any good friends, there was nobody beside his family to care for his death.

So Edward's hope quickly diminished, sliding down a seemingly endless pit filled with blackness up to its brim. With every click of the gears of his mind, depression and self-loathing filled him ever more. Finally, the clicking of the gears slowly started to slow down by the heavy weight of the miserable thoughts bound to them. Ultimately they ground to a halt entirely, their motion stopped by the dark veil of depression engulfing and sickening the last morsels of consciousness that were performing their task properly. His mind was left without thoughts of hope and light, the only ones remaining being of a kind of stormy sadness, infused with sarcastic sorrow.

As his conscious thinking came to a stop, concomitantly a shrouding tiredness pervaded his body, compelling his muscles to discontinue their movement: he hauled himself ever slower on the long road to the reservation. Soon, meters felt like feet, and feet felt like inches. It seemed endless. He gazed forwards and saw nothing but the darkness of the night. He looked backwards and saw only the blackness of his recent past, shattered memories blanketing the road. He was getting nowhere, for a reason he couldn't even remember. Why torture himself like this? Though he was a sadist, he was no masochist.

_"Hope, it is the quintessential human delusion."_ _ Full stop_. _There is no strength in hope, only weakness._

Upon having that thought launch into his conscious mind, he stopped walking. He gazed forward aimlessly, shoulders hanging from the desperate tiredness that, after forcing his muscles to stop, now hit him in the face like a bus hits a cat on a busy New York City avenue. He sighed.

_I give up._

Edward slumped down next to a pine tree surrounded by a few bushes. He sat there, panting with the whirlwind that was his thoughts. He leaned his head back and let the blizzard of his memories overtake him, closing his eyes as if to feel them to their fullest extent. The cold wind and snow battered his aching body as fervently as ever. His feet and hands were numbing; so was his nose, which was red and lifeless. Snow covered his aching body as it crept towards the final edge of life. Edward could feel that the end was nigh – and it better be: prolonging the suffering wasn't Edward's style.

_There won't be sex. There won't be hotness. There won't be Jacob. There won't be friends. There won't be family._

With every facet of his life that seemingly disappeared into the cold, calm waters of oblivion, his thoughts quieted down, like an engine spinning down to full stop.

_There won't be a future._

As his mind was being emptied from the tumultuous content that had run rampant within since the night before, all that was left was an eerie quietness, a heavy silence, seemingly eternally lasting in its dreaded darkness.

_There won't be a life._

* * *

**A/N**: Next chapter should come within a few days, for I don't wish to leave you guys hanging like this… even though the sadist in me kind of enjoys it ;-)


	6. Purgatory

** A/N**: Chapter 6, as promised. Truth be told, it panned out differently from what I thought, so all those wanting to know what the deal with Embry is, I'm afraid you'll have to wait for chapter 7… Anyway, hope you guys enjoy the read, and let me know in the reviews what you think. _As always, __**reviews are most welcome!**_

Again, a thank you to **dantemalfoy** and** Lineia **for providing comments!

_Warnings: Drama and angst._

* * *

**Chapter 6: Purgatory**

_"One cannot be betrayed if one has no people."_ – Kobayashi, The Usual Suspects

A clock ticked. The right hemisphere of his brain was aching. Edward meekly opened his eyes, and peaked at the world surrounding him.

_Is this heaven?_

He rolled his eyes around in their sockets, taking in the surroundings while his blurred vision slowly returned to normal. A light blinded him, causing his headache to worsen steadily until the pain became too much, so that he closed his eyes and lay still until the throbbing in his head subsided. When it had returned to a shallow, nagging sensation, he cautiously reopened his eyes, hoping to take in more details.

Though he expected bushes and trees, perhaps a small bird landing in front of him, chirping softly, he saw something else. He wasn't quite sure what he was looking at, but it wasn't natural.

_Heaven is a stranger place than Earth, it seems…._

His head had tilted to one side, as he lay on some soft surface quite unlike the cold earth he remembered from the forest. Something covered him, although he wasn't too sure what it was. Whatever it was, it was too warm and snugly to be snow.

_Heaven is a warm place._

His mouth curled into a smile, expressing a deep satisfaction at the turn of events. He had been freed from the shackles of his life and found himself in a better place; a warm place, where softness caressed his body. Maybe he could start afresh – a life after death, bathing in the glowing beauty of God himself.

Just as he was slipping back into sleep, muffled sounds reawakened him. He reopened his eyes as his lips uncurled and turned into a frown, his face tensing while trying to make out what he was hearing: soft stomping and low voices. He rolled over to redirect his ears at the source of the noise, so that he came to lie on his left side. When he did so, and his gaze swung to the side, he was surprised to see redness and brownness appear before him. Amazed by the change in colours, he slowly righted himself by propping up on his elbows, so that he could better investigate where he was. He saw red walls, a brown door, a white ceiling.

_I'm in a room?_

Edward's confusion was palpable. He was lying in a bed, not sure whether he was dead or alive. The world seemed so soft, cosy, warm and friendly; not at all like the one he had left behind. That one has been dark, threatening and full of misery. Perhaps he was not in heaven, but he didn't seem to have been dropped back in the hell of the night before. Was he in purgatory?

_I must have died, there is no way I could have survived that night…._

At that point he heard crackling and his glance shot towards the door. The handle was slowly turning! Edward felt panic creep up from his loins to invade his spine, nailing him to the bed as it engulfed his upper torso.

The door opened.

Edward calmed down, his tense face slightly relaxing but his eyes still opened wide with terror when a middle-aged woman stepped inside carrying a plate and a glass of milk. She eyed him curiously for a second before approaching him.

"I see you're awake! Good. I brought you something to eat and drink, you must be starving!"

The woman sat down on the bed, showing him the glass and the plate, the latter carrying some kind of toasted sandwich. Edward wasn't hungry at all, however. As he stared at his visitor it dawned on him: he wasn't dead and he wasn't in after life. His hopes, which had soared high, were instantly shot down. He had not escaped his miserable life after all….

"You should really eat something kiddo, it will make you feel better…." The woman insisted, holding the plate closer to Edward's face as she stared at him intently. He glanced at her face. Her hair was curly and came down to her shoulders, but was starting to turn grey in places. It seemed to Edward that she had been a brunette once upon a time, a long while ago. She wore round glasses with small lenses, making her look about twenty years older than she probably was. Her Bordeaux-coloured sweater was baggy and worn-out, and her jeans betrayed a long life lead and ready to be thrown out. Nonetheless, she seemed like a nice lady, smiling at him pleasantly, and nudging at him with the food. Edward's thinking was still slow, and the world seemed unreal to him as he let his gaze travel around the room once more before moving back to the woman.

"What's your name dear?" Her piercing voice broke the silence. Edward stared shyly at her and averted his gaze, staring out of the window instead.

"Edward," he croaked dryly.

"Oh dear…. Here, have a drink." and she practically put the glass of milk to his lips and tilted it, so all that Edward could do was swallow. He simply complied, feeling deflated and tired with life, unwilling to fight this unknown stranger's motherly instincts.

After a few gulps – Edward had to admit that the milk tasted nice – she lowered the glass again and put it down on the nightstands, together with the sandwich. She then looked him over and placed a hand on his leg, piercing his eyes with her gaze as she did so. She remained silent for a moment, but finally she began to speak.

"My husband said he found you yesterday in the forest, at night. You were unconscious and you weren't wearing a coat." She averted her gaze and looked down at her feet as she kept talking. She raised her head and stared at Edward with an expression of worry on her face.

"What happened to you? Where are your parents? We need to call them and tell them you are okay…."

Edward gazed aimlessly in front of him. Whereas previously the reminder of his parents would have wound him up with grief, now he felt nothing. The word "parents" had lost all connotation to him, a veil of apathy engulfing the word, ripping away all its meaning. It was a hollow shell, a relic from happier times that had gotten in disrepair out of disuse. Words like "friends" and "family" had suffered the same fate during that cold winter night.

_At least, without people, I can't be betrayed like this again…._

In the void that was his thoughts and feelings, an almost negligible pang of relief briefly touched his heart when this notion dawned on him. However, the relief felt bitter and was clouded by an overbearing apathy that quickly rid him of his sorrow.

"I have no parents, family or friends," he spoke sadly, but with a bored flair of nonchalance.

The woman looked shocked. Her pupils dilated and her eyes widened, even if only slightly. She seemed perplexed, though a vague glimmer of understanding shot across her face. It did, of course, explain why he had been in the forest that night, freezing to death. Edward could see she was at a loss for words, but he was unimpressed. He looked at her with utter boredom, feeling truly apathetic about the whole affair.

While the woman was still trying to collect her thoughts and say something useful, Edward had loosely fixed his gaze forward again. His mind was empty, all thoughts flushed away during the last night. An emptiness; a dark void as he had never really remembered experiencing had taken hold of him. He felt his body tingle with pleasure at the softness around him, but at the same time he felt numb. He looked outside the window and felt how the sun's warm rays, breaking through the layer of clouds intermittently, heated his tired body; he felt none of it.

The world was greeting him, the sun winking for him to come. He looked upon it with a sinking lethargy, feeling drained of all opinion, feeling and thought. He just didn't care about anything. He didn't care for the soft bed, nor did he care for the woman. He didn't care for the warm rays of the sun, or the food and drink that were given to him. The fact that he was alive caused him no happiness either. When he was considering all this, he let out a nearly inaudible sigh, but it was but a sigh of boredom; of not knowing what to do with it all.

Living: the icy finger of apathy made it nothing more than an outright boring prospect. For what was he going to do with it? He felt like doing nothing, and in a way he couldn't be but annoyed at this woman's husband for "rescuing" him, had he been able to muster the strength to feel annoyed. That, too, just seemed useless to him. Really, being dead would be so much easier. He had nothing to live for anyway, so why prolong life? Maybe he should try to get out of this place, go back into the forest and wait for the shadow of the night to once again try to creep its long, bony fingers around his tender neck.

"I'm sorry, I had no idea," she responded with a sad voice. "I'll let you eat your sandwich in peace. I'll come check on you later."

The woman's chatter reached Edward like through a blanket. Her voice sounded dull and lifeless to him, muffled by the boredom he felt about the situation. Meanwhile the woman had gotten up from the bed and had turned around to face him. She looked him over as a weary smile formed on her wrinkled face.

"I forgot to introduce myself, Edward. My name is Angela." She lingered helplessly for a moment before turning around and exiting the room, closing the door behind her. Edward winked with slight confusion, having only just barely registered her name.

He eyed the sandwich and noted the grumbling feeling in his stomach, but he couldn't be bothered to extend an arm and eat. What would be the point to sustain his body if he wasn't planning on doing anything with it? Instead, he lay back on the soft mattress, curling up under the blanket. He closed his eyes dreamily and slid into a heavy, black sleep.

* * *

_It was snowing. A heavy wind gust through the trees, making the leaves rustle restlessly. Edward walked aimlessly along a road, not knowing where he went or why he went there in the first place. Cars swept by him in silence, for all he heard were the weather pounding against his clothed body. As he kept walking, the wind became stronger, and walking further became more difficult. Soon he was fighting to put another step forward, until finally he wasn't strong enough and was forced to stay in his place. In that moment he asked three simple questions:_

_"Why am I doing this? What's the point? Where am I going?"_

_A car sped by him in silence, but stopped not far in front of him. A guy stepped out and walked towards him easily, as if there was no wind at all. It was a Native American; it was Jacob… and he walked towards Edward, who was still struggling against the wind. When Jacob stood in front of him, he extended his arm and reached over to Edward, grabbing his wrist. With ease he yanked him forwards and lead him to his car, an old, rickety piece of crap. They sat inside, and Jacob started the engine, but Edward was surprised when he didn't hear the rumbling of it. In silence Jacob steered onto the road and turned the car around. The car shook when Jacob steered it off the other edge of the road and put the car in reverse. At that point Edward lurched at him, and awkwardly dragged him to the passenger seat while he switched to the driver's seat. He, Edward, was back in control, as it should have been. He smiled vaguely as he stepped on the gas and the car moved backward, shaking heavily as it got back onto the paved road…._

* * *

Edward awoke when his body was shaken. Lazily he opened his eyes as he stretched his arms, the image of Jacob behind the steering wheel still imprinted on his thoughts. Angela stood in front of him, holding the uneaten sandwich that she had placed on the nightstand. She looked worried.

"You didn't eat your sandwich dear. Please, have a go at it, will you? I have to go do some shopping, but my husband will be home soon. Just stay in bed and we'll take care of you."

Edward couldn't help but be surprised at the help he was getting from these total strangers. In any other circumstance he'd feel delighted, but an all-encompassing indifference obliterated that possibility. He only felt numbness pervading his heart and soul as he looked up at the sandwich and the worried expression on Angela's face.

He righted his sleepy body on the bed, leaning against the headboard as he took the plate with the sandwich from Angela. She smiled happily when he started eating. He wasn't hungry at all though; he just wanted her to go away, to not have to deal with the sandwich any longer and get some peace and quiet.

He took a bite and slowly chewed on the dry bread with the moist slice of ham, but he didn't really have any sensation of taste. The food seemed like ash in his mouth, which was dry as a desert. He forced what felt like a gulp of sand down his arid throat, but he took another bite. Angela faced him contently. Finally she stood up, announced once more that she was going shopping, and left, closing the door softly behind her.

Meanwhile Edward kept chewing. The slow, rhythmic movements of the muscles relaxed him. Concrete thoughts were absent in his mind, since the iron fist of apathy was still tightly clenched around it, emptying it by paralyzing it. Even with the abyss that was his mind, he still felt tensed-up. His body seemed to know something that his heart wasn't aware of. As he kept chewing however, it felt like his body was relieved from stress, and the paralyzing touch of apathy was lifted ever so slightly; lifted enough for some thoughts to leak back into his emptied mind.

_Jacob at the steering wheel_….

The thought brought back flashes from the dream. It seemed like some kind of prophecy: Jacob rescuing him with such ease from his abysmal predicament. It was, however, a prophecy that he couldn't believe in. Jacob didn't have the tools or the power to help him, right?

Such doubts clouded Edward's mind. Every time cautious hope entered it, the full force of apathy immediately lurched at it, restraining and trimming it down to nothing. Like a ship rocking on the waves, swaying to and fro as the wild ocean battered against its creaking flanks, so Edward's mood was subject to the rumble of opposing thoughts assaulting his soul.

He sat in silence, hearing nothing but the ticking clock and the murmur of feelings and memories tugging on his sleeves, calling for his attention like a bunch of five-year-olds. Indifference made him unwavering in his resolve to ignore them. As he stared at the wall in front of him, lost in the absence of any thought or feelings, the vision of Jacob at the steering wheel flashed before him momentarily before fading out again.

Suddenly the door handle creaked and the door was softly pushed open. A man with a rough beard and a checkered shirt and blue jeans peaked through the opening. Edward, distracted, took a moment to register that he was being observed, but soon his gaze travelled lazily to the door. The man looked at him with curiosity. When he saw Edward was awake and conscious, he opened the door further and stepped inside.

He was big, heavily built and his muscular torso towered above Edward. His strong chest supported big arms, and his neck was broad, though it was hard to see with the medium-sized beard covering it up partially. His hair was cut rather short, though he wore a woollen hat that covered up most of the top of his head.

"You're feeling better, I see. Did my wife give you anything to eat?"

Edward merely glanced at the half-eaten sandwich on his lap. He must have dropped it while eating it, because the last thing he remembered was a handful of sand flushing down his throat. He must have momentarily blacked out for a moment before this guy came in.

"I see she made you one of those sandwiches of hers. Don't tell her I said this, but I understand you didn't eat all of it."

He swivelled his torso as he came down to sit down on the bed next to Edward. He took the sandwich and the plate and put them back on the nightstand. He then refocused his attention on Edward.

"My name is Brad. What's yours?"

Edward looked up at the guy, and told him his name: "Edward."

His voice was not as hoarse or croaky as before, since his mouth had been wetted with the milk Angela had given him. He hated to admit it, but the drink and food had done him some good and his body felt a bit revitalized, even if his mind was still buried alive in a ten-foot deep pit.

"Well then Edward, what on earth were you doing in the middle of the forest at that time? You could have frozen to death if I hadn't found you, you understand that right?"

Edward merely smirked.

_That was the point…._

Brad seemed a bit confused at Edward's smirk, and repositioned his legs to more comfortably eye Edward as he leaned back, supporting his muscular torso with his left arm. He observed Edward intently, a frown having appeared on his bearded exterior.

"What's so funny?" He asked, his voice betraying annoyance. Edward glanced at him.

"You," he answered, short but resolutely. Brad was obviously taken aback a bit at Edward's short rebuttal.

"Excuse me?" He asked, trying to sound tough, but Edward was unimpressed.

"You don't even know me, Brad. Why would you be so concerned with my life when I myself don't care one flying fuck about what happens to it?"

Edward's words stung Brad like alcohol stings on a gaping wound. Perplexed he looked at Edward, to whose expression had returned a bored look. After a few moments he finally seemed to recover from the initial shock.

"So what, I should have left you to die?"

Edward glanced at him, his eyes mat with apathy, though for a fraction of a second a nearly murderous flash seemed to have made his eyes sparkle. Edward's answer was once again short:

"Yes, that's exactly what you should have done."

It was obvious that Brad didn't understand what he was hearing. Slowly it seemed to dawn on him that he hadn't rescued some poor teenager that was accidently freezing in the cold – he had inadvertently prevented a suicide attempt. The notion dropped on him like a bomb.

"What are you saying?" Brad answered cautiously. "You were trying to get yourself killed out there?"

Edward stared at him and nodded briefly. Brad's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Why?" He asked, looking Edward over with prying eyes in a manner that betrayed both worry and curiosity. Edward sat silent, staring at his feet, which peaked out from under the blanket at the other end of the bed. He sighed briefly.

"I have no reason to live," he answered, the tone of his voice hollow and sad. He sounded broken and hurt to the bone. To Brad it became increasingly clear that he was dealing with a bigger problem than he had anticipated, and he wished his wife was with him. Unfortunately he would have to do it without her.

"Such a young, good-looking guy as yourself must have a future in front of him, right? Where are your parents; can't they help?"

Edward barely batted an eyelash to that suggestion. "I have no parents; no family that can help me." Brad looked at him with an unconvinced frown.

"Surely you have somebody to take care of you?"

Edward grew more and more annoyed with Brad's unhelpful chatter. This seemed like some kind of torture; a delay of execution. Why couldn't he just be left alone? There was nothing Brad could do anyway to fill the emptiness inside of him. He was rotten to the core; where his mind and soul had been filled with playful happiness was now a gaping crater, fuming with the toxic waste that had been dumped within. Thus Brad's question remained unanswered.

"Look Edward, I want to try and help you. If you tell me what's wrong, I can do that. If you don't, there's nothing I can do."

Edward shot him a glance. While his face seemed perfectly expressionless, his eyes radiated anger. He watched Brad like that for almost a full minute. After that Brad made to stand up and walk away, leaving Edward alone. However, just before Brad could do that, Edward blurted out, "If I tell you, will you leave me in peace?"

Brad repositioned himself on the bed, and tilted his head backwards, lifting his chin as he eyed Edward, frowning. "I can't promise that," he finally answered.

Edward rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Fine, whatever. My father found out that I'm gay and threw me out. I lost my family. I have no friends, no goal, no nothing; nobody to miss me when I die, and_ I_ will certainly not miss life. There, that's it; that's my story."

Edward stared at Brad briefly after giving his concise account of past events. He then sighed loudly and refocused his gaze on the window directly in front of him. Brad, meanwhile, was once again shocked and averted his gaze.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been prying like that," he mumbled as he stood up and made his way for the door. He closed it silently behind him and Edward was left alone. Downstairs he heard a door shut loudly and muffled voices penetrated the room through the hard-oaken door. To Edward it was all the same. He rolled over in his bed, closed his eyes but couldn't fall asleep. Instead he tried to listen in on the conversation below him.

"…thrown out of his house by his family for being gay. Not sure what parents he has but here I wish I had a shotgun ready."

"Brad, please don't say such things! Only God knows who hears such threats; you're not a murderer!"

"I know I know, don't worry, it was a figure of speech. The kid seems completely apathetic to me. The betrayal of his parents must have ground his mind to dust… he even claims to not have any friends, can you believe it?"

"Oh dear oh dear, poor boy. I wish I knew what we could do about it. He is too young to die…. Ah, it's so tragic."

"Yes, we must figure something out Angela, we have to help him in some way. There must be somebody out there that could help him, right?"

"I don't think he likes us prying at him like that, Brad. He kept sending me angry scowls when I asked him."

"Yeah, he did the same to me. Nonetheless, we should make him appreciate the fact that…"

Edward at last fell asleep as Brad's words rumbled on in his mind.

* * *

When he awoke again the sun was setting. The red light of dusk bathed the room in a soothing orange glow; the same kind of light in which he had basked during that summer evening when he had been at Gaya with his siblings.

He yawned loudly and scratched his abs as he sat up a bit in the bed and stared at the setting sun. The door opened soon afterwards, and both Brad and Angela stepped inside. Angela was carrying another plate – once again a ham sandwich by the looks of it – and a glass of milk. She set it on the nightstand as she sat at the edge of the bed and looked Edward over. Brad kept standing behind her, arms folded. The room was dark, making it hard for Edward to make out their faces against the background of the setting sun.

"How are you feeling, dear?" Angela asked. Edward nodded slowly in reply.

"I'm okay". Angela nodded, a smile spreading her lips and curling the corners of her mouth. Truth be told he felt as empty as before and wasn't sure what to feel. Happiness at being alive? Annoyance at not being dead? Thankful for these strangers' kindness? Angry that they were so persistent in wanting to know what had happened to him?

"My husband here told me what you said. We are sorry for your loss and we hope we can alleviate your pain. We won't pretend that we know what you are going through, but at least let us help make things easier for you?"

Edward heard the words, but wasn't aware of their meaning. They floated past him, swirling around his ears like mosquitoes. He simply nodded in reply, smiling weakly. He looked Angela over, whose face radiated with new energy at Edward's answer, but Brad seemed unconvinced. He still stood with folded arms, frowning at Edward.

"Edward, how are you really feeling?" he asked. Though he frowned at him and seemed unimpressed with Edward's previous answers, Brad had asked this in a calm voice that invited honesty. Edward wasn't sure what to say. He was in conflict over his feelings since the night before. He stared forward in silence for a while, contemplating an answer while phasing in and out of reality intermittently.

"I don't know what to feel. I feel empty… even if I wanted to feel something I wouldn't know how to. I think I would like to cry, but I have no tears. I'm a void, and I'm not sure what to do about it," he finally managed as he looked up at Brad. Stating the truth like that felt strange, but a tingle of relief permeated his lower back. He breathed a bit more easily, even if feelings didn't return to him. Brad was lost in thought, and Angela's smile had evaporated, her expression having turned into a worried frown.

"Edward," Angela finally started, "we don't believe that you have nobody. There must be somebody out there to help you. Somebody, anybody…"

Their persistence was as infuriating as it was praiseworthy. For some reason that Edward couldn't fathom they seemed really concerned for him. As he stared at them and considered their question, flashes of his earlier dream appeared before him. There was perhaps one person that wanted to see him again, but he was unsure about how that person could remedy his situation. He looked at Angela and Brad, and he sensed their trepidation as they awaited an answer. He sighed.

"Perhaps there is somebody, but he won't be able to help me."

Angela's eyes widened, and Brad unfolded his arms as he crouched down to look Edward straight in the eyes. Hope visibly flared up in the married couple that had looked at him, almost begging, for the better part of five minutes.

"Who is this person? I'm sure we can contact him to help you out." Brad asked urgently.

Edward merely sighed and shook his head.

"It's no use."

He turned around in his bed to face the wall opposite of Angela and Brad. He heard how Angela got off the bed, and accompanied her husband out the room. The food and drink remained on the nightstand, untouched. The door closed silently as the light in the room was turned off.

Edward was alone in the room once again, thoughts mulling around in his head for the first time since the previous night. They were sparse and few, but they were there – and they pertained Jacob.

* * *

**A/N:** I will be abroad for a few days as of Thursday and will only be back sometime in the second week of February. As such, I can't promise anything within the next two weeks, but I will try to deliver chapter 7 as soon as possible.


	7. Back to the Living

**A/N**: Thank you all for waiting! Finally, here's chapter 7.

I'm horrible. I've been promising stuff about Embry for two chapters now, and every time I keep delaying it because there is other stuff that needs to be done first… So chapter 7 is a bit shorter than other chapters, but chapter 8 is pretty much written so there should be no big delay between chapters 7 and 8. And yes: chapter 8 _will _feature Embry_. _Hope you enjoy chapter 7, and as always, **_feel free to leave_**_**crazy amounts of reviews!**_

As always, a thank you to **Linea** and** dantemalfoy** for providing comments!

_Warnings: Drama, angst, mild erotica._

* * *

**Chapter 7: Back to the living**

A few days had gone by since Brad had found Edward in the forest, freezing to an untimely death. The better part of those days Edward had spent in bed, sleeping or eating. He got out of bed a few times, mainly to go to the toilet, brush his teeth, or do some other menial personal care tasks. Angela kept bringing him food; small meals at first, but later she had started serving him hot food too. She fed him chicken with mashed potatoes and beans, or pork stew with rice, or variations on those dishes. Suffice to say, there wasn't a whole lot going on in the "creativity" department.

Edward had found it difficult to eat in the beginning, leaving half his plate for the garbage bin. However, as time progressed, a shallow appetite returned. This was probably in part due to the support of Brad and Angela, who lovingly cared for him throughout these days. Besides bringing him food, they talked to him, and slowly managed to pull his story out of him. Among other things, they found out who he really was: Edward _Cullen_.

The name brought a glimmer of recognition to their faces as they remembered the feud between Carlisle Cullen and the Quileute tribe. While they were quick to admit that they had only followed it from a distance, they were more than aware of the sour relations between the tribe and the family, and they had understood from those more intimate with the situation that Carlisle Cullen was the one to blame for how events had unfolded. Suffice to say that his religious zealotry and adamant nature did not make him into a particularly loved community icon. As such they had an easy time empathizing with Edward, whose story had merely added new points to their list of Carlisle Cullen sins. The rest of the Cullen family did not score any better of course: their refusal to help Edward as Carlisle unleashed his anger onto the boy seemed no less of an insult than what havoc Carlisle himself had wreaked upon his son. They concluded that the family was an accomplice to Carlisle's betrayal, and they could see how Edward had come to the conclusion that he didn't have parents or family.

How he concluded that he didn't have any friends, though, was something they had a hard time understanding. Their conversation on the first day, during which Edward had admitted that perhaps there was somebody that could help him, had given them hope, but Edward was adamant in keeping this person's identity a secret. Every time the couple started about this mysterious person, he at first rebutted their questions quickly by negating that he had ever existed. Later he admitted the person's existence, but he was quick to add that it was no use chasing after him: he hardly knew the person anyway.

So the first days went by. To Edward it was all in a tedious blur of sleeping and eating, and every moment he spent awake and not eating felt weirdly unreal, as if time had come to a stop. The sensation of physical numbness that accompanied the paralysis of his feelings kept pervading him, too. Still, even as he wallowed in his apathy, he managed to make use of Angela and Brad's listening ear, which helped. It had felt good to tell them about how he had meticulously tried to avoid hinting at his gayness in the presence of family members, for instance. Be that as it may, he always choked up when his story reached the chapter containing Jacob, and it was here that Angela and Brad felt that something big had happened. They tried reaching out to it, as if they were trying to recover a coin that had slipped in-between a wall and a closet, but all to no avail; Edward kept his mouth shut on the topic, and there was only so much Brad and Angela could do. They decided to wait for Edward to open up by himself; their meddling only seemed to make matters worse.

One night, a week after his failed suicide attempt, Edward awoke from his sleep. It was some time before midnight. Drowsy and a morning breath filling his mouth, he lay in bed, propped up on his arms, so as to inspect the room. There was nothing unusual to see…. It was dark in the room, and outside seemed even darker. He stared out the window lazily, watching to see if anything interesting would happen. Of course he was disappointed, prompting him to slip out of bed, stumble awkwardly through the door and into the bathroom. He filled himself a glass of water, gulped it down quickly, and returned to his room.

He softly slipped back inside his room and closed the door behind him when new thoughts flooded his feeble mind. Suddenly he remembered that it was exactly a week ago, to the hour even, that he had given up on life and hoped the night and winter would take him. Feelings of dread overtook him as his memories swept him back to the cold winter night in the forest, almost erasing the revitalization that his mind and mending soul had gone through over the last few days. It's true: murmurs of subdued feelings had started presenting themselves again to his consciousness, one by one. Thus it seemed his heart had started beating again, gearing up to continue living. But now, with the avalanche of memories assaulting his drowsy brain, that progress was quenched.

Edward groped the door handle to his room as a sinking feeling of panic overtook him. For the first time it dawned on him what had happened and his eyes widened in horror as he realized that he could have been dead right now. The notion crushed into his enfeebled mind like a tsunami washes away a rickety, wooden hut. His legs started trembling, after which a sensation of loss and blind panic quickly pervaded the rest of his body, making him quiver like a feather. He plummeted down onto the floor, in foetus position, groping his legs as tears of anxiety timidly presented themselves to the world. Soon he sobbing audibly, and not much later hot tears rolled down his cheeks, dripping onto the floor where they created small, humid spots on the white carpet. His sobs and snivels remained relatively quiet at first, but as the memories of that winter night increasingly imposed themselves upon his now awakened consciousness, his body trembled more strongly and his tears invaded his lush, humid cheeks in greater numbers; his sobs grew more intense.

After a week of obstructing apathy, emotional and physical numbness and continual indifference about the world and his life, he finally broke down crying. All the psychological trauma that he had sustained and had bottled up now forced its way out, breaking forcefully through his frozen exterior with newfound determination.

A knock on the door didn't make him stop. He barely noticed how the door was subsequently opened and rays of light descended down upon his body, which was numb and cold with sorrow. Through the haze of delirious grief that shrouded his senses, he felt a warm hand appear on his shoulders, and quieting and soothing babbling reached his ears. He felt how he was dragged up by his armpits and raised, so that he was lying somewhat awkwardly against somebody. Edward kept crying through all that exercise, a hand stroking his hairs gently as his tears found their way to freedom.

So he lay for the better part of an hour, all the harm that had bottled itself up finally exposed to the world. When he started to calm down he managed to turn around, and he saw he had been lying against Brad all this time. His first reaction was of surprise, but he soon concluded that he truly and honestly didn't give a damn – though this time it wasn't apathy that caused him to feel that way; it was relief.

He lay against Brad's body and lost himself in his strong arms, a lush wave of sense-numbing relief washing away the last of the thought-inhibiting shards that had guarded him from feeling hurt. The trembling of his body quieted down and his limbs felt strangely warm and revitalized, even in the face of exhaustion, for these intense feelings had completely drained him of energy. _So this is what it feels like to have a caring father_, he finally admitted to himself.

After years of his father's intolerant and abusive commentaries and cold and distant disposition towards his children, Edward felt shocked at the warmth and love he was now receiving. He felt himself like a small boy again; how it had felt when he had dropped off his bike, his face planted roughly onto the cold road. His mother had come running to him and had picked him up. She caressed his head, kissed his face soothingly and mumbled quieting phrases at him. He remembered well how her hands had held him in a tight embrace as she calmed him down, had smiled at him, and told him how she would eternally love him.

_What a joke!_

The thoughts of his mother brought back salty tears as he was reminded of all he had lost. Once again he erupted into crying, causing him not to notice how the door had opened up wider and a second figure had appeared in the room. Angela had come in and had taken a crouched position next to Edward and her husband. He hadn't noticed how she had started stroking his hair gently, pressed a small kiss onto his forehead, and had started mumbling soothing words at him. Meanwhile she had stared at her husband lovingly, and they had embraced each other with the one free arm they both had. So they all embraced each other: Angela, Brad and Edward, unified in a tight grasp.

Even if he hadn't initially noticed Angela coming into the room, Edward had become aware of the embrace almost instantaneously: he felt how his body tingled pleasantly with surprise when it was pulled into Brad and Angela's hug, and how he was subsequently pressed into their warm, caring bodies. A welcoming calmness pervaded the scene.

Fuelled by their warmth, care and the shock of reliving the memories of recent events, the dam now broke completely: he let out all of his insulted feelings, which had accumulated over the summer and had been lovingly nurtured by his family's homophobia. Finally, all the refuse that had drained him from his energy to live; fostered his anger towards his father; nurtured a resentment towards his family; numbed and clouded his mind and emotions… all washed out of the pit in which it was all held. Shocked by the ever-increasing love he was receiving, his crying intensified with feelings of sheer relief that mindlessly hit his heart and made his soul quiver under the heavy load of joy and feelings of liberation.

Rays of golden light protruded through the thick webs that had entrapped Edward's feelings and descended down into the deepest crevices of his broken spirit, bathing his demented emotional machinery in a mending and hopeful radiance. Slowly, the machinery, brought to a screeching halt by the weight of feelings that a teenager should never have been allowed to experience, started running again. The old gears, rusty and drained of energy, screeched noisily as the first cogs were set into motion. Steam hissing and puffs of smoke announced the restart of Edward's mental life as reinstated emotions reached up into his consciousness once again.

These people, whom he had only met a week ago, had accepted him for what he was; had given him a home, talked to him about his problems, gradually melted the ice that fixated his feelings, and were finally able to break his stasis. As the embrace of Brad and Angela continued, it fuelled his emotional machinery further, and he felt enlightened by their invigorating affection.

The rest of the night had progressed in the same vain: the three of them lay on the floor, holding each other. Edward groped the couple, and the couple held Edward tightly clenched in their embrace. As they did so, Edward's sobbing had died down so that they found themselves in a pleasant silence. The air was heavy with Edward's emotions that had been ejected from his subdued soul so forcefully, but inside their embrace, the air was light with the relief that all of them felt. Angela and Brad looked at each other and Edward intermittently, smiling and stroking his hair softly. They couldn't do but feel proud of him and be happy that they had succeeded in breaking through the ice. Now there was hope for Edward, and though he was still fragile, they dared dream of seeing him repaired and with a smile on his face.

Around 5AM Edward was once again tightly asleep. Brad and Angela, tired but content, together put him back to bed, tucked him in, and slipped out of the room. Soon, the house was cloaked in silence as the last of Edward's hurt drifted out into the cold winter night.

* * *

The following days went by quickly, and Edward seemed to do better every day. While he relapsed into doubt and sorrow every once in a while, it was never as dramatic as what had occurred during that night, a few days ago. When it did happen, Brad, Angela or both of them were there to help him out of it again. Their nurturing and soothing calmness restored parts of Edward's confidence, and he dreaded life less with every day that passed.

Roughly a week later, Edward sat in the living room, bathed in the glow of the setting sun as he read a book – Psychoanalytical theories by Sigmund Freud – and listened to a whiny violinist assaulting his poor instrument. Still, the dramatically performed music attracted Edward in a way that he could not describe, prompting him to put the book down in his lap and close his eyes, so as to focus on the music. As he closed his eyes and the blackness of his eyelids replaced the image of Brad and Angela's living room, his brain took over, and projected memories and thoughts onto those eyelids, using them like a projector screen. On that projector screen, it played a long-lost memory: the dream Edward had had of Jacob. Edward quickly opened his eyes.

_Jacob_.

Somebody that he hadn't thought about for over a week had suddenly found his way back into his recuperating mind. With the memory of the boy with the sculpted abs and perfectly proportioned chest, feelings of arousal were re-awakened; feelings that he had also forgotten about completely. As excitement took hold of his loins, he found his hand itching with a craving that he couldn't put his finger on, but it was a craving that was familiar to him. He again closed his eyes, and explored his old memories, including the ones that brought him back to the night he had spent with the wonderfully submissive native.

So he sat in the chair, in the living room, drowning in those pleasant memories, when everything was still unspoiled. He opened his mouth slightly as he breathed softly and slowly. His body relaxed, compelled to rest by the exciting remembrance. As if on autopilot his itching hand slipped to his groin, and he carefully started to massage his slowly hardening limb through the fabric of his pants. The craving itch slowly subsided, as he remembered everything again; it had been such a long time since he had cum! He licked his lips as he felt the desire to do so increase again.

He looked over his shoulder to see if anybody was there. There was nobody, but still he stood up and walked up the steps to his room. He closed the door softly and locked it, went to lie on the bed, and unbuttoned his pants. He slipped his hand inside, massaging his semi-hard dick through the fabric of his underwear. The warm touch of his hand against his cock, his fingers gently caressing his balls, made him moan ever so softly as he rested his head on the soft pillows. He held his forehead with his free hand as he submerged himself in the memories.

He went through the night with Jacob, for the first time in two weeks. Something had changed from that time, however: previously, in the forest, he had found himself stroking his throbbing limb less gently and with increasing despair. And as he had progressed through the memories and had recollected the frenzied fucking, he had jerked off with increasing speed, hoping that when he finally came, the rush of ecstasy would rival the bliss he had felt in Jacob's car. When he came he had been pumping his cock almost hysterically with agonized despair, but the ecstasy he felt was but a meagre representation of the real thing.

Back then – the last time he had cum to those memories – it had felt like those memories were the last thing in the world that could give him some form of hope or strength. So different was today, when he lay in this soft bed. He stroked himself lovingly at he thought of Jacob, and kneaded his balls gently between his index and thumb. When he thought of how Jacob had widened his eyes in fear of the fucking Edward was about to give him, he didn't stroke himself with increasing force and agitation; instead he opened his eyes, and looked at the ceiling, slightly shocked.

Now that he felt more or less freed from the burden that was his family, had received love and warmth from people that accepted him the way he was, and was as a result able to think more clearly, his sadistic tendencies seemed a lot less "normal" than previously. What kind of person enjoys paining his partner for sexual pleasure? He couldn't lie to himself about it though: he had enjoyed it that night with Jacob, and the thought of spanking Jacob still made him hard. The evidence to that fact was insurmountable: he held his cock firmly as his thoughts unravelled, and as they did so, he felt how his cock went from semi-hard to fully erect. And when Edward thought of collaring Jacob and dragging him around on a leash, having him eat food from the floor, having him bark and calling him "his pet" or "his little slave", he couldn't deny the excitement that gripped his loins and filled them with delight.

His now erect cock twitched, asking for his undivided attention. Carefully repressing his doubts regarding his sadistic tendencies, he returned his attention to his dick as he continued to jerk off with slow pumps. He closed his eyes again and went through the memories, imagining and reliving every moan and groan to the smallest detail. He tried to re-breath the air that he had breathed that night; he hoped to see the colours again as vivid as he had seen them that night. Shrouded by pleasure, his senses dulled and his imagination working top-speed, he soon found himself back in that car. As the memory progressed, his jerking off increased in rate and intensity. Then he finally came: he moaned loudly as cum lurched forward over his abs; it was noticeable that he hadn't cum in a while! He breathed heavily in the aftermath, still slowly pumping his cock to milk himself dry and experience every last morsel of ecstasy that he could get.

When he was done, he simply lay on the bed, eyes closed. So desperate as his jerking off had been two weeks ago, so calm and loving had it been now. The knowledge that people out there seemingly accepted and loved him, even if he didn't understand why, had drained him from his most immediate anger and resentment, allowing him to see the world in a different way. The sun's rays seemed more brilliant than they were previously, and the sky was clearer than it was cloudy; like the glass of milk next to his bed was now half-full instead of half-empty. His breathing had quieted. He was calm and relaxed, and his thoughts drifted to all kinds of places. But whatever place they drifted to, they always ended up converging on Jacob: the native with the beautiful muscles, the wonderful jaws and impressive neck, who had been able to free Edward's animal self all those nights ago.

His animal self. As the memories of Jacob and that night seeped back into his consciousness, he realized how his gut burned with the desire to do it all again. Weird or not, he was a domineering sadist, and he needed another fix.

Then he remembered his dream. At the time it had seemed ludicrous, but now, as he felt invigorated and relaxed, as if he had been brought back to the living, he felt renewed hope emerge within him. Perhaps Jacob could help him out, if only by offering a listening ear…. Not because Brad and Angela weren't good enough, but Jacob was his age, and had maybe faced the same fears. Perhaps he'd understand. Perhaps he'd be able to help….

Perhaps he ought to try and contact Jacob.


	8. Third Wheel on the Wagon

**A/N**: Thank you all for waiting! I'm sorry for dragging things out lately. I've been wanting to post chapter more frequently, but I had a rather busy and eventful few weeks that sadly required me to neglect A Cold Farewell. Now I should have some more time as the experiments I'm running for my research project allow me to focus on other things too, and since I have no classes to go to or homework to make, that leaves me with time that can be spent on writing. As such, Chapter 9 is already quite far long.

So, here's chapter 8. Those who have been asking about Embry should like this chapter – though that's all I'm going to say. Have a fun read! _As per usual, __**reviews are most welcome!**_

As always, a thank you to **Lineia** and** dantemalfoy** for providing comments!

_Warnings: Drama, angst._

* * *

**Chapter 8: Third wheel on the wagon**

"_We are never so defenceless against suffering as when we love."_ – Sigmund Freud

_Jacob_.

The name of the native echoed in his head as he woke up the day after. He lay in his bed and stared up at the ceiling, his eyes wide with newfound determination. Thoughts mulled around in his invigorated consciousness, claiming his attention, until finally he jumped out of bed, put on his slippers, and paced to the bathroom to drink some water and brush his teeth. Angela had given him a new toothbrush, and Brad had provided him with one of his old razors and some shaving cream. Until a week ago, before he broke down mentally, he hadn't touched the razor at all. Now however, now that life seemed more liveable with every day that passed, he was more inclined to make use of it. Today he actually picked the razor up. With Jacob at the forefront of his thoughts, he took a steady hold of the plastic little thing and the shaving cream, applied the cream and started shaving.

After taking a shower and getting dressed, he walked downstairs to get himself some breakfast. It was a Saturday, so that he found Angela and Brad sitting in the living room. Brad was reading the newspaper, while Angela was quietly reading a book. The murmur of jazz music coming from the radio pervaded the room. When Edward entered, all eyes were suddenly fixed on him. Angela smiled, and Brad looked sternly over his glasses, but soon his expression softened into a smile also.

"Hello dear, glad to see you awake. How are you feeling?" Angela asked.

Edward nodded curtly. "I'm doing okay." He smiled quite happily, and he felt honestly so. It hadn't been the first time; more and more often his laughs were not forced, as if only meant to please the couple that had taken him in so selfishly. Rather, his smiles were increasingly the result of actual happiness returning to his complicated self.

"I made pancakes Edward, why don't you go get some? They're in the kitchen." Angela nudged at the kitchen door, and was happy to see Edward's smile widening. He nodded, and strode off.

After having taken a plate and loading it with pancakes, he came back to the living room and sat down on one of the comfy couches, facing the loving couple. Both had continued reading, but Angela sent him a content glance when he had started eating. Edward had smiled back happily, munching on the pancakes all the while. So they now all sat in the living room, the silence of the room chased away by the jazz music that came from the radio. It was a quiet, calm Saturday morning, and the sun shone brightly, with a few clouds dotting an otherwise impeccably blue sky.

Soon, Edward was done eating. He put the plate down on a small side table to his left. He stared at Brad and Angela firmly, frowning. They were oblivious of it, so he coughed to draw their attention; still no response. Finally he just broke the jazzy silence. "Angela, Brad?"

Both of them now looked at him, with some surprise on their faces. Angela quickly regained herself and smiled again. "Yes, dear?" Edward looked her over as he considered his words.

"So, the person that I mentioned that I think might be able to help me…"

Upon speaking those words, Brad and Angela in unison put their reading matter down and stared at him. Angela's mouth was half-open in surprise, but her eyes twinkled. Finally Edward was about to open up on this point! Brad was in a similar state of tense anticipation as his wife. He stared at Edward intensely, waiting for him to continue. Edward sighed briefly as he looked down at the floor.

"His name is Jacob, and he is one of the Quileute tribe. I'd like to see him."

He cautiously raised his gaze again, to meet Brad and Angela's intense stares. He didn't meet them; Brad and Angela were staring at each other instead. He looked them in the eyes and saw a sign of understanding. It hit them that the Quileute tribe would surely not welcome him with open arms, and they recognized that that might have been Edward's reason to withhold on telling them. Little did they know that Edward was more concerned with Jacob's ability to help in general, rather than a potential hostile environment. They soon glanced back at him. Brad folded his newspaper and lay it down on the side-table next to his chair.

"When do you want to leave?" he asked.

Edward's glance shot to Brad, his pupils dilating with surprise and a smile appearing on his face. "As soon as possible!"

Brad nodded and looked at Angela. "You heard the kid. We're going." Brad made to stand up, but Angela interjected.

"Edward, know that if things don't work out, you're _always_ welcome here. Brad will give you his cellular, so please call if you need help. We enjoyed having you here. Please, don't be a stranger?"

Edward gulped at those words, emotions overtaking him as words of gratitude clogged up his throat. He didn't cry just yet, but it wouldn't have taken much to make him to. He managed to articulate a muffled "thank you", after which he stood up and walked over to Angela. He sat down next to her and hugged her in a strong embrace. When he moved out of it, he merely looked her in the eyes, and muttered another "thank you". She smiled back at him pleasantly. He stood up again and looked at Brad, who motioned him towards the front door. He too smiled, eyeing him in a friendly manner, akin to how Edward's late grandfather had done when they left him after spending an afternoon with him at the old people's home.

Edward felt lucky: lucky to have been found by these people. Their enduring love and care warmed his heart, and he was happy that he wasn't saying "goodbye" to them, merely "so long". It made it easier for him to leave their house, and set foot again in that wide-open world, full of danger, threat and the ever-present temptation to relapse into depression. He'd stay strong this time: for them, and for Jacob.

Brad and Edward stepped into Brad's pick-up truck. Brad looked him over as he started the engine and hit the gas, enticing the car to come into motion. Soon they found themselves on the road to the reservation.

They stayed silent as they continued on their journey. Edward glanced over to Brad now and then, and noticed how he was frowning. Admittedly, he didn't know Brad that well, but he knew him well enough by now to recognize that this frown was not a frown of anger or annoyance, rather sadness. Like Angela, Brad was overtaken with emotion at Edward's leaving; though being a typical manly man, he didn't show it.

Soon they found themselves at the sandy path that lead up to the reservation. Brad pulled over and turned the car's engine off, as he looked Edward over, briefly sighing before saying "You will be okay, right?"

Edward nodded, forcing a smile that almost instantaneously disappeared. No matter if Edward was doing good, he had trouble showing it: As excited as he was about the prospect of seeing Jacob again, he felt unnerved by a lingering fear that the world would once again collapse onto him. Brad looked him over worriedly. He then got a pen and a piece of paper out. He scribbled something onto it and handed it to Edward.

"Here, that's my cell's number. Call me when you need our help. We'll come for you, immediately."

Edward accepted the number gratefully, smiling a wide, honest smile, and put it into his shirt's pocket, thanking Brad as he opened the door and got out. The movements and situation seemed strangely familiar to him, but he wasn't sure why. Assuming it was just something he had seen in a movie, he slammed the car door shut. A worried Brad looked at him through the window. Edward simply waved, trying to widen the smile on his tensed-up face. Brad started the engine, and soon he was back on the road.

Edward was alone again.

As Edward stood along the road, he considered his options. A tiny little part of him craved to get back into the forest, slump down against a pine tree, and wait for the night to claim him. Fortunately, a much bigger and more dominant part of him kept the image of Jacob firmly in mind, so that Edward was instantly prompted to walk down the sandy road, towards the reservation.

Soon he reached a house; a small house, with wooden boards making up the exterior, painted in a fainted red. It had probably seen better days. The front door, which was white with small, square windows, was built in an outcropping of the building. White stripes lined the edges of the roof, and a small, wooden ramp was built to meet the front door's threshold. By all means, it was a cosy house.

The front door suddenly slammed open and a middle-aged man wheeled outside, looking at him somewhat suspiciously.

"State your business!" He shouted from the ramp.

Edward ogled him as if he had seen a ghost, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. It wasn't tucked into his pants like normally would be the case, making him look rather sleazy.

"State your business!" The guy cried out once again. Edward still didn't respond, instead just eyeing the native. He wore a kind of cowboy hat and had long, black hair. In better days he probably would have been a rather good-looking man.

Finally the guy got fed up, wheeled off the ramp and rolled in Edward's general direction. He yanked on his wheels with a fervent strength that took Edward aback – this weak-looking exterior seemed to have quite some resolve and confidence inside of it! Edward merely blinked as he was approached by the queer fellow. When he was finally about a meter in front of him, he stopped, and gazed Edward right in the face, piercing his eyes with his.

"I know you. You are one of the Cullens, that miserable bunch of egocentric, religious zealots." the guy sneered at him, a sudden anger possessing him as he spat out the name of Edward's family as if it was a disease. He wheeled a little closer.

"You are getting off my land, you despicable animal! You will find no friends here!" he hissed at Edward. Something else drew Edward's attention however, while this broken man launched an increasing amount of insults at him.

From behind the red house appeared a figure. It curiously peaked around the corner. Longish, black hair veiled a boyish face that contained two, dark eyes. They peered at him as he peered at them. Edward recognized the face.

_Embry!_

A glimmer of relief rolled over Edward's face as the weakest of smiles curled his lips ever so slightly. The invalid in front of him had noticed it too; the barrage of threats had suddenly subsided. Edward raised a hand and waved. Embry clearly understood Edward's signals, and had, seemingly somewhat reluctantly, started towards him. The middle-aged invalid looked round and saw Embry too. He started to oppose to Embry getting into contact with Edward, but Embry kept coming anyway. Soon they were standing close to each other.

Edward merely smiled, and Embry smiled back, though hesitantly.

"I see you already met one of the elders, Billy Black." Embry nudged at the black-haired man in the wheelchair, who looked thoroughly appalled by Embry's lack of respect for his authority.

"Pardon me? This creature here that you see is Edward Cullen, one of those religious fanatics from down the road that wanted us expelled to Alaska, and here you are, talking to him as if you have known him for ages!" Billy seemed to explode from outrage, but Embry managed to shush him. He then looked at Edward.

"What is it you want? If you're looking for Jacob, he went cliff jumping; he's not here. You don' look so great by the way… what happened to you?"

Edward noted Embry's concern. In all there previous interactions, he never had seemed to care for Edward. Moreover, he was always opposed to him getting in touch with Jacob, or so it seemed. He had never made his intentions very clear though, so Edward remained in the dark as to what his problem was. Now here they were, and Edward felt positively elated to see the gloomy, young native. Embry's sudden talk yanked Edward out of his thought and back into reality:

"So? What happened?"

Angela had given him some of Brad's shirts and pants, all of which were at least one size too big. He still worse his own, dirty shoes, bot on the whole he probably looked like a clown. Edward looked down at the floor, ashamed of his looks, and mumbled something incomprehensible. Embry looked him over.

"You want to have a coffee at the nearby diner? You look like you need it…."

Edward's gaze flashed upwards to meet Embry's. That seemed like an idea from heaven! He nodded. Embry didn't smile in response, looking as serious as ever. Edward almost felt like Embry had wished that the answer had been negative. Still, he kept true to his word, patted Edward on the back, pointed down the road where they had come from, and gave Edward a little push in that direction. Satisfied that Edward was about to leave, Billy Black wheeled away. He rolled through the front door into his small, red house, and slammed the door shut with a bang. Embry and Edward were left alone, staring at the shut door. They then briefly glanced at each other, and set off for the diner.

They walked in silence. Birds, chirping merrily in the trees, and rustling of leaves in the softly blowing wind, were the only sounds. Small tree branches littered the forest floor, and they crackled softly as the pair of guys stepped on them. Edward glanced over to Embry as they proceeded in the direction of Forks – apparently the diner was somewhere along the road, a short ways into the forest.

Embry's head had drooped, watching his feet as he put them one before the other. His black hair veiled his face, so that expressions remained hidden from Edward – something with which Edward didn't feel very comfortable. He had made it a habit of trying to read people's facial expression continuously; a hidden face disabled that possibility, making Edward feel uncomfortable.

And so they continued walking for at least fifteen minutes, until they finally arrived at a turn to the right. An extra five-minute walk down a sandy road brought them to the diner. A soft push opened the door, and Edward's nostrils were filled with all manner of delicious smells. He took in a deep breath, rich with the aromas of fried bacon and egg, as he stood at the door.

"You coming in?"

Embry's low-pitched, sad voice shook him from the simple pleasure the various smells brought him. It reminded him of weekends at home; he'd come down from his room after a good night's sleep – one without worries, as should be normal for the average kid. He'd find his father at the table, reading the Sunday morning newspaper, and his mother would be in the kitchen, frying eggs, bacon and sausages. A small mountain of pancakes was already laid out on a plate, ready for him to grab.

As he reached for the first one, his mother would turn around in the kitchen. She would smile quietly and nod in approval. Edward would smile back. Even his father would slowly lower his newspaper – just enough so that his eyes looked over its top edge. And while Edward never saw his whole face on such Sunday mornings, the eyebrows betrayed his father's approval too. He would then continue reading, and Edward would eat.

But that was all over now.

"Yeah, I'm coming," he replied, and he quickly walked further into the diner, closely following Embry. He had gotten seated at the bar, and Edward sat down next to him. They ordered a coffee each.

Embry sighed.

"So, what's up?" He glanced at Edward, an expression of silent curiosity on his face. A certain calmness pervaded it that hit Edward as strange, considering the awkward situation. Though, if anything, it was more an expression of curious pity that he seemed to take on Edward, and not for bad reasons: Edward looked weird in his baggy shirt and loose pants. He also still had that wound on his head, with scratches below it like a mountain path leading up to a small cavern.

"Not that great," Edward replied, his voice raspy as his vocal chords fought against the hoarse throat and dry mouth to produce intelligible sounds.

"No kidding," Embry sarcastically retorted. Edward sent him a brief glare, but Embry only smiled vaguely. Meanwhile their coffees were delivered. The smell of freshly ground coffee beans swirled up from the small mugs and filled their nostrils.

"So, what happened? If you don't mind telling me, of course…."

Embry looked at Edward inquisitively, hoping Edward would speak up. At the question Edward's head drooped slightly. He took a sip from the coffee, sighing loudly as his body filled with the deliciousness of the simple liquid. He then straightened his back and threw his head back, stretching his arms in the process, repositioning himself a bit on his barstool before folding his arms and leaning on the bar. He sighed again and shifted his gaze to Embry, who still awaited a reply.

"Short version: my father found out I'm gay, abused me, threw me out of the house, and none of my siblings or my mother had even the slightest inclination of doing anything about it. I was betrayed by the people I thought loved me most."

His confession had been delivered briskly and in a business-like manner that not at all befitted the subject. Edward looked at Embry when he had finished speaking, and he could tell that his brief story had torn a hole in Embry's heart. he swallowed audibly and looked away, sorry to have brought this up. Edward looked back at his coffee.

"Don't worry about it, I don't need pity," Edward spoke softly.

At those words Embry shot his glance back to Edward. His lower lip trembled a bit, although Edward wasn't sure why he would be so shocked by his declaration. Unless….

_Unless he is indeed gay, and is afraid of the same thing happening to him_.

Edward smiled at the thought, which visibly confused Embry. He looked at Edward with a strange frown that expressed a mix of pity, curiosity and surprise.

"You are gay, aren't you?" Edward spoke softly with a quieting tone of voice, soothing Embry. After a short while, Embry finally sighed and nodded silently.

"I don't think you have anything to worry about. Jake is out and proud and he seems to be accepted, no?" Edward held Embry's hand reassuringly. Embry nodded again. He sobbed briefly before regaining himself.

"Look at this, I should be the one consoling you, not the other way around," he spoke in-between soft snivels.

"Yeah well… it's okay." Edward retracted his hand and took another sip from his coffee. He put the mug back and stared at its contents intently. A smell of coffee infused the air around the two guys, who were now both lost in quiet thought. The calmness had returned to Embry's facial expression as he broke the silence

"So how did it happen? How did your father find out, I mean."

Edward sighed as his memories of the night with Jacob were re-awakened. His lips curled into a smile when thinking of the events that culminated in that fateful kiss in front of his old home. The thought of that kiss evoked a pained sigh as he stared deeply into the black, swirling content of his mug.

"My father saw me and Jake kissing in front of my old home," Edward admitted. Embry's face darkened at that truth, but he remained silent. Edward didn't even look at Embry as he continued.

"Jake had driven me home after we left the bar. I think it was roundabout 4 A.M. when we arrived there… I didn't even realize my father might be awake." Here it became too much for Embry. His curiosity got the better of him, interrupting Edward's story.

"Wait, he brought you home that late? What did you guys do until that time?"

Embry's expression had further darkened by now. Edward was disquieted by what he came to realize: the calmness was a veil. This veil that graced Embry's expression during the conversation had so far quite successfully hidden Embry's true emotions, but now the veil seemed to be lifted slightly, revealing what was behind it bit by bit. _What_ it was veiling was a different matter, though. Edward considered the options: concern for Edward perhaps? A misplaced worry about himself? Maybe anger at how Jake had run off with Edward, leaving him and his mates alone at Gaya _again_? Maybe he was annoyed at how Jake tended to forget his friends when they were out for drinks? After all, they went together, as a group, and here Jake was, running off with the first guy he could sink his claws in.

That seemed like logical reasoning, but if it were true, it complicated matters somewhat. Thus he became afraid to say the truth: that he and Jacob had fucked. Yet again, Jake had left Embry for a quick fuck…. This obviously wouldn't go down well with the boy, who had been nice enough to accompany him for a cup of coffee. Edward didn't want to upset him. The last thing he wanted was for Embry, what felt like his first chance to return to a normal life, to turn his back on him.

Moreover, and Edward was surprised at himself for not coming up with this sooner, Embry seemed like the only person that could, at this point, get him into contact with Jake. Above all, Edward felt that if again somebody would abandon him so soon after losing everything in his life, he wasn't sure if he could recover from the new wave of apathetic depression that would no doubt swallow his mind and mood whole. Of course, he had Angela and Brad and felt strengthened by their presence. Still, the image of the black night, that shadowy murderer, involuntarily crept back into his thoughts. He shuddered, and took a sip from his coffee.

"You fucked, didn't you?" Embry suddenly asked. The question carried an offended undertone, but was imbued with a pressing urgency to know the truth.

The question caught Edward entirely by surprise; the shock of having that question flung at him so bluntly caused some of the coffee to go down his throat the wrong way – that is, through his windpipe. He started coughing profusely. Soon he also started to blush and he wasn't quite sure where to look, scratching the back of his head out of embarrassment as the final drops of coffee were violently ejected from his lungs. He swallowed harshly to get rid of the nasty taste it had left behind. When his windpipe and lungs finally settled after the brief period of shock, he looked Embry in the face with a quirky smile of astonishment.

"Well?"

Even though he was pushy about an answer, Embry's face radiated a certain cool calmness about the whole affair, but it was not a good calmness. Edward sensed that, like before, it was more a veil than a sincere feeling, and whatever was behind this icy shroud made Edward rather uncomfortable, to say the least.

First he thought it might have been some kind of anger at Edward for making Jacob leave his company on yet another outing with his mates, but was that really true? Was it indeed disappointment? Embry's expression seemed unusually dark, and he was unnervingly persistent in coaxing an answer out of Edward. It didn't seem like a reaction that was in line with Edward's prior idea. Perhaps it was something Edward hadn't really considered up to that point….

Jealousy?

He shifted from left to right on the barstool as he mulled over the reasons for Embry to be jealous. Finally, his thoughts picked up speed as his mind shifted into next gear to process the sudden flood of information that led to one conclusion. At long last it hit him:

_Is Embry in love with Jake? _His thoughts trailed off to an earlier point in the conversation, where Embry had sobbed a little, making him think of a quote of Sigmund Freud: "_We are never so defenceless against suffering as when we love." Is Embry really worried about his family finding out that he is gay, or is he suffering because of a love for Jacob?_

Edward stopped his movement on the barstool. He stared at his mug, but didn't register it at all. His eyes widened and his pupils dilated from anxiety as the conclusion echoed in his conscious mind. His hands became sweaty and cold as he understood the consequences his honest answer would have: he would lose Embry. Embry, meanwhile, started to lose patience.

"Come on, it really isn't a very difficult question… either you fucked or you didn't. What is it, yes or no?"

He shook his head to get rid of some of the black hair that had fallen in front of his right eye. When he had jerked his head like he had done, swivelling it roughly to the right, his glistening hair had lashed at Edward like a whip, before they settled to the side of Embry's youthful face. Two dark eyes now pierced Edward's instead of one eye.

Edward opened his mouth but couldn't utter much. He tried a few times, but his throat was dry after the fit of coughing he had just endured. In defeat, he closed his mouth and remained silent as he took a few sips from his coffee before putting the cup back onto the table hesitantly and emitting a brief sigh. Still looking at the cup in front of him, he finally managed to utter the truth.

"Yes."

Embry's reaction was acute and full of anger.

"Son of a bitch!" He exclaimed, and struck the bar with his fist. Now they both sat in silence, staring at their mugs of coffee.

"Son of a bitch," Embry finally repeated, slowly and quietly, removing the fist from the bar and resting it on his lap. He sat slouched on his barstool, fidgeting quietly with his hoody's zipper.

"I'm sorry…" Edward started, but he stopped when Embry sent him a scowl. That scowl quickly broke down into a hoarse laughter, full of pain and hurt. Edward looked at Embry with surprise.

"You okay…?" He finally asked. Embry shook his head, still chuckling.

"It's my own damn fault. I get angry with you, but it's my own bloody fault. It's as if I'm the eternal third wheel on the wagon." He shook his drooped head in denial of his own stupidity; or that's how Edward interpreted Embry's body language.

Edward waited for Embry to say more, but he didn't say anything. His chuckling had subsided and had turned into a frown as he continued fumbling with the zipper of his hoody. Finally he brought his arms back onto the bar and leaned on them for a few moments, after which he stared at Edward, biting his upper lip. He suddenly seemed terribly anxious.

"What?" Edward finally asked. Embry merely shook his head. He swung his gaze back to his coffee mug, and eyed it intently for a while. He seemed entirely lost in thought. Suddenly though, he took the mug of coffee and emptied it in one giant gulp, cringing as the hot fluid steamed down his oesophagus. He placed the mug back on the bar and pulled his wallet as he stood up from his barstool.

"Hey wait a sec, you leaving me here?" Edward demanded, annoyed by Embry's sudden rush to leave. Embry merely gave him an empty glance as he opened his wallet, took out a few coins and swatted them onto the table. As always, the imprint of the condom was still there.

Only after he had done all that did he look at Edward.

"Yes, I'm going and I'm leaving you here. I'll see you around."

And thus Embry left. Edward remained on his barstool, staring with wide-open eyes of shock at the front door of the diner. Embry had pushed it open hurriedly, and had run away from the diner with considerable haste. The door of the restaurant closed slowly, the cold winter air penetrating the bastion of warmth that was the interior of the restaurant. A bell rang as the door finally closed completely, falling into place with a soft "thud".

Embry's tone had been dark and anxious, filled with an annoyed urgency. Edward had no idea what had suddenly happened, except that he was alone once again. Amidst the patrons, he was but a faceless youngster.

The conversation had taken a very strange turn as he thought back to Embry's sudden laughter. Confused he analysed the conversation again and again, until he finally gave up. He had no idea what happened.

He drank the last of his coffee, and put some money on the bar; hopefully just enough to pay for the coffee. He stood up, walked over to the door, through which he exited the diner. The door closed behind him with a soft click, ringing the bell as it shut. The cold air greeted his warm face with renewed vigour, so that he started shivering again. He tucked his hands in his pants' pockets, meanwhile wondering if he ought to get back to Brad and Angela's place.

His eyes widened in surprise.

The déjà vu he had outside Brad's car hit him, a flash of recollection bringing him back to the original event of which the déjà vu was a meagre representation:

_"That's my phone number. Call me." Jacob added a nod in affirmation of the gesture._

He pulled his hand out his pants' pocket and held a crinkled, little note in his hand. Edward opened the crumpled little thing and looked at it. A weak smile breached his desolate exterior.

The note contained Jacob's phone number.


	9. The Sheep in Wolves' Skin

**A/N**: And here we have chapter 9. As I said: labwork gives me time to work on this stuff. I will try to publish at a higher pace now, but I can't promise anything. I have a tendency of stacking up research projects, and as such I have two future projects to prepare for by reading articles (most of which I have fortunately already read). Anyway, without further ado, I hereby present chapter 9, and hope you find it a fun read. **As always: I'd be delighted if you let me know what you think by leaving a review!**

_Warnings: drama and erotica._

Thanks to **Lineia** and **dantemalfoy** for providing comments!

* * *

**Chapter 9: The Sheep in Wolves' Skin**

Edward stood outside the diner and eyed the note with disbelief. How could he have forgotten about this? He had had the possibility to contact Jacob all the time! He didn't need Brad, Angela or Embry at all! All he needed was a telephone. Sadly his mobile phone with still with his parents, and going there was an absolute negative. Hurriedly he looked around, but saw no phone booth of any sort. Disappointed he gazed back at the note.

Jacob's handwriting was typically male: very hooky and scribbly, ugly even; not at all the wavy, lush font that the girls in his class usually had. Admittedly, his own handwriting wasn't any better than Jacob's, and his parents had tried to correct it by making him practice on Sunday afternoons when he was about nine years old. They would seat him at the dining table, and would tell him to copy one or more pages out of a book. When he'd finish, they'd check his work, and if it was readable enough, he was free to go play or something of the kind.

Edward sighed as he remembered those times. He stood outside, in front of the diner's door, the crumpled little note still in his hands as he gazed forward absent-mindedly. Suddenly he was yanked back to the present when it occurred to him that the diner might have a phone!

With a firm tug he re-opened the diner's door and rushed inside. Some of the customers looked up with a perplexed glint in their eye when they saw the boy come in that had left only a minute ago. Edward didn't notice them; he was only interested in finding the waitress. He spotted her at the other side of the restaurant, walking around with a coffeepot, offering people refills.

Pacing in her direction, Edward clenched the fist that held the note. His face was tight with tension when he patted the waitress's back. She turned around, surprised to see this boy stare her in the eyes with a look of such urgency.

"Erm, hello sir, what can I do for you?"

Edward panted a bit, but regained his breath quickly. "I need a telephone, do you have one I can use?"

The waitress nodded briefly and motioned him to come with her. Together they walked through a door into, what seemed like, a small office. A desk was fraught with all kinds of tiny papers of various colours, with scribbles on them that were hardly legible to anybody but, probably, the person that had written them. On the wall hung a board with a calendar on which several dates had been circled with red marker, and more scribbles denoted some kind of seemingly important events. Edward stared at the mess that was the office when the voice of the waitress brought him back to reality. She stood nearby a phone and held the horn in his direction.

"There you go sir, I'll leave you to it," and she exited the room hurriedly, the coffeepot still in hand. Edward had gone over to the telephone and had taken the horn of the waitress when she left.

He sat down next to the phone and briefly thought. How was he going to approach this? Would he just barge in with a proposal to meet, or would he slip a meet-up casually into the conversation? Decisions, decisions… He took the note and laid it down next to the phone. He merely looked at it for a minute before he rested his hand on the keypad of the phone, sighing. He then mustered the courage, and as his fingers danced from key to key on the music that the key presses produced, Edward felt a mix of unnerved excitement creep up from his abdominal region all the way to his head.

Finally it was going to happen: he would hear his voice again. He could already smell his musky sent; could see his glimmering hair in the light of another dusky bar. He became hard at the thought of it all while the telephone was ringing. The quiet rhythm of beeps that the phone produced felt like a mockery as they continued.

_Come on then, pick the bloody phone up!_

Still beeping, it seemed to continue forever. Finally the connection switched over to voicemail.

_Dang it!_

Edward hung up briskly by swatting the horn onto the keypad-bearing holder, and picked up again. Once again the presses were accompanied by a meagre melody, and he held the horn back at his ear. It was the quiet, beeping rhythm all over again. Edward kept waiting as the never-ending beeping went on. Finally, somebody picked up at the other end.

"Hey?" An uncertain voice answered with a questioning undertone. Edward trembled at hearing it. It sounded so close-by, but Jacob was still so far away!

"Am I talking with Jacob?" Edward inquired, his voice trembling slightly as excitement overtook him.

"Who wants to know?" The voice answered, sounding more confident this time.

"It's Edward…"

It remained silent for a short moment, after which he heard some muffled speech in the background. Edward felt how his hands started to sweat. He became warm as nervousness clenched his chest, wherein his heart pounded heavily. The prolonged silence and muffled voices didn't bode very well.

"Edward… I heard about what happened from Embry. I'm so sorry to hear what happened!"

Jacob's words sounded sincere, but Edward wasn't listening to them. One thought ringed through Edward's head: _Embry is with Jacob? Is that why he left so suddenly?_

Thoughts raced through Edward's mind as an avalanche of scenarios presented themselves to him. If his prior realization was true, then Embry's sudden departure to meet Jacob could mean only one thing: he was going to tell Jacob about it!

_Damn, I have to get to Jacob immediately!_

"Yeah, it's fine, but I could use a friend Jake. Would you mind meeting up?" Edward winced as he heard the words roll out of his mind. _Since when are we friends?_

"Yeah sure Ed, I can't leave right now, but we can meet soon. Where'd you wanna meet up?" Jacob's empathy-dripping voice echoed through Edward's mind, which had reached a climactic state of tense excitement. He was hugely relieved that Jacob had agreed to meet.

"I'm at that diner in the forest. I think it's called…" But Jacob interjected.

"…The Sheep in Wolves' skin, yeah, I know it. I'll be there in about 30 minutes, okay?"

"Okay Jake, I'll see you soon… and thanks." Edward answered.

"No problem Ed, it's my pleasure. See ya!" Jacob hung up. Edward did the same. He sat on the chair, and stared at the horn that he had just laid down. It was actually going to happen…. He would see Jacob again.

* * *

The next thirty minutes past by horribly slowly. Edward sat outside, on the porch of diner, waiting for Jacob's car to come rolling down the path that came down from the main road. Meanwhile Edward wondered what he was going to do or say. If Embry had indeed talked to Jacob and had professed his feelings to him, Edward might have lost already.

No, he couldn't think like that. Those thoughts were what had pushed him down to his knees previously, and it wasn't going to happen again so soon. He was given a chance; he just had to make sure not to screw it up. And besides, perhaps Jacob didn't even want Embry in the first place! He remembered Jacob's delighted though fearful grin when Edward had pounded him in his car, and then he thought of Embry's timid face. Of course Edward didn't know Embry too well, but he didn't seem like the dominant type; and the dominant type was exactly what Jacob seemed to want; nay, _need._

The broken rattling of an old, rusty car disturbed Edward's thoughts. He looked up and was greeted by the sight of Jacob's car rolling down the sandy entryway. His heart flared up and a smile exposed his teeth as he stood up and lazily walked in the direction of the car hurtling down the road. He could already see Jacob sitting inside, wearing that magnificent brown leather jacket of his. He parked his car under a tree and proceeded to step out. As he turned around to greet him, Edward was already quite close. He sported a wry smile as he stepped towards the beautiful native.

"Hey Jake."

Jacob nodded as he leaned against his car, his foot placed flat against one of the tires. "Heya Ed."

Edward stopped short of Jacob, and they proceeded to just stare at each other for a moment, before Jacob pushed himself of his car, walked over to Edward and pulled him into an embrace. He then released Edward again and looked at him with a pleased smirk. "I was hoping you'd call, and frankly I was hoping you'd called already two weeks ago. Now I understand why you didn't. Are you okay?" Jacob looked Edward over slightly worriedly now. He had probably noticed that Edward had lost some weight.

Edward nodded shyly. "I think I'm doing better, but I had a rough two weeks." He drooped his head and stared at the gravel on the diner's parking lot. Jacob patted his back. "Let's go in and have a drink. I'm buying."

Jacob proceeded to turn Edward around and put an arm around his shoulders, pushing him forward gently as he started stepping in the direction of the diner. Edward felt a bit weird about it, admittedly…. For all his fantasies about dominating Jacob, the tables had turned drastically now. He felt like he was melting away in the arms of this strong native; his smell made him weak, and the look of his powerful jaws made him tremble in awe. Right now, Edward didn't want to think about domination or submission; he only wanted to think about hungrily guzzling up the warmth of his strong, muscular friend, and so he did. He leaned his head against Jacob's shoulder as they progressed towards the diner's main entrance, and he kept doing that when the little bell ringed and the door closed behind them softly. Once again he was inside the diner.

They found themselves a comfortable booth, in which they went to sit beside each other. Edward still leaned against Jacob, who looked down on Edward with a soft smile. When the waitress came by, he asked for two coffees. His voice was soft, pleasant and sympathetic. Edward revelled in its deep undertones as he felt Jacob's chest vibrate lightly as he spoke. Finally, Edward was relaxed, and his tensed-up expression curled into a dry smile. He closed his eyes, which he only re-opened when the piercing smell of coffee infused his nostrils. Two white mugs had appeared on the table.

When they both had taken a sip from their coffees, Jacob looked over at Edward. "So, tell me what happened."

Edward sighed and started his story all over again. How they had kissed – emphasizing how he had broken his one rule – and how his father had seen them. He told Jacob about the abuse and how his father had chucked him out of the house; how he nearly died later that night, but was found by Brad an Angela; how he had spent the last two weeks recuperating from the mental desolation he had been through. Throughout the story, Jacob had remained mostly silent, sometimes nodding, offering consoling words of affirmation at the events described by Edward. He stroked him on his back, listened quietly, and at the end of it all, he embraced him in a tight hug. Edward's heart melted at the strong but soft touch of the russet-coloured stud.

After a few moments, Edward pulled out of the hug, to look Jacob over. His sturdy manliness was as delicious as ever, the jaws and sternocleidomastoid muscles as expressive as the morning sun on an unclouded, summer morning. He stared into those deep, dark eyes, and then he said the words before he knew it:

"God Jacob, I want to go back to that night…."

When he realized what he had said, he immediately clamped his mouth shut and stared at Jacob as sudden bewilderment grasped him at his throat. Jacob stared back at him blankly, but after a moment, when he saw Edward's eyes widen out of embarrassment, Jacob couldn't refrain from smiling lightly. His smile soon evolved into a soft chuckle, to Edward's relief: his perplexed expression also softened up and melted down into a smirk.

"Yeah, that night was mind-blowing on so many levels," Jacob spoke, and looked at Edward mischievously. His eyes turned sad though as a frown took hold of his eyebrows. He sighed as he refocused on Edward. "I'm afraid things have gotten complicated."

Edward had been afraid of that, and even though he had prepared himself for this to happen, he couldn't do anything about the feeling of dread that crept up from his stomach and made him go slightly sick. "What's wrong, Jake?" He finally uttered.

Jacob turned to Edward to have an easier time talking to him. He loosely stared out of the window before he finally found the courage to tell Edward what happened. He could already see the first signs of angst creep into Edward's face, making it all the harder to tell him about recent events.

"Ed... You ought to know that nothing was decided yet. I'm not sure what to do, but I must be honest with you." Jacob began. Edward knew where he was headed, but he didn't break Jacob off.

"About twenty minutes before you called, Embry came by. He said that he had spoken to you just before, which, frankly, surprised me, since he used to complain about you after every night that I had spent with you at Gaya." Edward listened attentively, and wasn't surprised by the news. He let Jacob continue.

"But it didn't stay with just that, Edward…." Jacob gulped softly before he continued. "He proceeded to tell me that he is gay." At that word Jacob looked Edward straight in the eyes. Edward simply nodded in affirmation, to Jacob's surprise.

"What, you knew?"

Edward nodded again. "I guessed it the night we fucked, before we left Gaya. I asked him straight on and he was so evasive that I kind of assumed it to be true. Then he told me outright when we spoke earlier today. He seemed to be in a hell of state about it." Edward concluded, gazing at Jacob all the while. Jacob merely lifted an eyebrow at the news.

"Well, I thought he would trust me enough to talk about it with me first, but apparently… well. I guess you ought to know the full story, because it doesn't end there." Jacob contemplated his words for a while, while taking another sip of his coffee. "Embry, he…"

Edward eyed him with a feeling of dread taking hold of his stomach. "Well?"

Jacob cleared his throat. "Embry is in love with me, Edward…."

_God no, it's true._ Edward thought. There was only one question he could ask next: "And, do you love him back?"

Edward's voice trembled as he mumbled the words, barely finding the energy to open his mouth to pronounce them. He had guessed correctly, much to his dismay. He watched Jacob as he sighed and repositioned himself on the leather-covered bench. He seemed to be in doubt. To Edward that was a good sign, even if he felt bad for feeling that way.

"I don't really know, Ed," Jacob said. "I have known him for so long. I see him as a brother. Not once have I even considered doing anything with him, or have I thought of… loving him. It's all strange and weird to me, Ed." He had refocused his gaze on Edward's eyes briefly, before he let them go again and shifted his gaze back to the coffee mugs on the table.

Jacob still averted his eyes from Edward's face, but he tilted his head to face Edward. To him it felt like he was casually checking out his groin, though he was sure Jacob was merely glancing absent-mindedly.

"And what's more…" Jacob continued speaking, forcing Edward out of his quiet ruminations. Jacob was now piercing Edward's gaze with his eyes, which made Edward feel a little unsettled though strangely relaxed, too.

"After our night together, I'm not sure Embry is the type of guy that I'd be able to be with long-term, you know? He is very timid. I'm not sure I have the patience for that any longer." He threw Edward a knowing look, and Edward smirked in response. Yeah, _he_ sure knew; Embry probably had no idea.

Jacob's confession came as a relief to Edward; he felt somewhat lighter now. Perhaps there was hope for him. He had constantly assumed that Jacob would go for Embry since they knew each other so well, but the tables seemed to be turning. Some of the fantasies he had had came back to mind. As he eyed Jacob, he could already smell the fresh scent of leather that came from the dog collar around Jacob's neck, the whip smacking against his ass as he held Jacob bent forward on a short leash. He felt how he grew hard at the thought, prompting him to quickly reposition himself so as to not show Jacob the unfortunate bulge in his pants. Fortunately, Jacob was staring at his coffee mug again, while fidgeting quietly with the mug's handle. It was clear he had to act; otherwise he might risk losing Jacob to Embry forever.

"So what will you do?" Edward asked timidly. Jacob didn't lift his gaze, but kept fidgeting with the coffee mug's handle.

"I don't know," Jacob answered quietly. He remained silent for a while before finally lifting his gaze and glancing back at Edward. "I mean, I like Embry, I just don't know if it can go any further than that. And then there's you…. You're looking at me with those hopeful eyes, and I just don't know what to say to you." Edward's gaze drooped down at those words.

"I'm sorry, Edward," Jacob continued. "I should probably think things through before I make any decisions."

Edward nodded and spoke a quiet "yeah" in affirmation, but the whole world could hear the disappointment in that word. His voice was shallow and he pronounced it with pain.

"I'm just confused, Ed. Don't see it as anything against you, please?" Jacob finally concluded after a brief moment of silence. Edward heard the words but barely listened. He could see his fantasies disappearing in the pit that was his past. He remained silent.

"Ed, please say something?" Jacob said, but without much confidence. Fear spoke in those words.

Edward looked over to Jacob. "What do you want me to say, Jake? I'll only make it worse for you." A swift and short rebuttal. Jacob was taken aback a bit.

"I don't know Ed, you must have an opinion on the matter? I figured you'd want to share it…."

"Oh you want my opinion?" Edward suddenly started. "Jacob, I'm exploding with feelings. Two weeks ago I was heading for you, hoping you could help me out. I was alone, tired, hungry and dirty. I stopped halfway because I didn't think you could or would want to help me, and so I gave up. I nearly died. It took me two weeks to get to a point where I could stand up without falling over again, and the first thing I did is run back to you. Now here we are, and I was delighted to see you. Now you tell me I might lose you forever. How do you think I feel, Jake? Do you really want my opinion? For so long have I fantasised about all the stuff I could do to you as your Master and owner, and now those fantasies are being communally flushed through the toilet."

Edward breathed heavily while delivering his rant. His nostrils flared and his eyes radiated a disappointed anger. Jacob listened to it closely, and was visibly saddened by what he heard. When Edward concluded his account, Jacob merely looked down at the table and sighed.

"Perhaps I shouldn't want to hear your opinion Edward, but still I ask you to spit it out."

"Well then," Edward said. "In my opinion, you'll not be happy with Embry, and the only things that you'll nurture are bitterness, disappointment and resentment. You won't feel content because Embry won't dominate you like I do, and he'll feel miserable because he can't seem to make you, his chosen god, happy."

Jacob stared at Edward blankly and silently, but Edward noticed how a glimmer of recognition adorned Jacob's youthful eyes as Edward unravelled his opinion before Jacob. "You're right," he finally spoke quietly.

They both remained silent for a few minutes. The time had flown by, and it was already past lunchtime. He stared at the clock above the counter: 2:03 PM. Fortunately the rule was not "_Nothing good happens after 2:00 PM"_. He thought back briefly at that night. The rule had come true without a doubt, and he'd be mad if he'd ever taunt fate like that again.

They sat in the diner for another few minutes, slowly sipping their coffees until it was finished. When the waitress asked if they wanted another refill, they both declined, eyeing each other with regret as shattered dreams were strewn all over the place. Finally the damning question came, and Edward internally winced at it with pained disappointment:

"Shall we go?"

Edward nodded and got up, stumbling awkwardly out of the booth, and following Jacob as he exited the diner after having paid at the counter. The diner's doorbell ringed excitedly as the door closed behind them and the winter air brushed their faces. Soon they stood at Jacob's car in an uneasy silence. They stared at each other. As Jacob stepped a bit closer to pull Edward into a hug, Edward confusingly held out a hand to shake Jacob's. They laughed awkwardly as they misunderstood each other's signs, but Edward quickly adjusted to hug Jacob. It was an unusually tight hug, too, which surprised Edward, given the weird circumstances.

Next, Jacob pulled out of the hug, made towards his car's door, and already had it open when he suddenly stopped short, held it for a moment, and spoke a soft "damn it", his head drooped, car keys clenched in his fist. He briskly turned towards Edward, who eyed everything with a certain amount of surprise.

"Who am I kidding, Ed," Jacob started. "You're right about Embry. He is really nice, soft and timid… and that's fine, but he lacks that strong side. I never knew, until our night together, how much I craved it; how much I _need_ to be dominated to feel fulfilled as a human being."

Jacob stopped and sighed briefly. "It weirds me out, this submissive side. I'm this muscular, manly man, and there I was completely hot and horny because of your sadistic, harsh domination. I feared you back there you know that? To my astonishment, the fear that I felt made me hornier than I'd ever been. I am a sheep in wolves' skin."

Again Jacob stopped and chuckled at the irony of having sat at a diner with that name for the past few hours. He stared briefly at the ground before he continued. "Maybe it's good that we didn't see each other for those two weeks. It gave me time to think, to do some research and thereby to understand. And now, with all I know, I'm not even sure why I'm contemplating Embry's offer. Perhaps because I didn't think you'd ever have me back again…."

A mischievous smirk appeared on Jacob's face as his eyes rolled over Edward hungrily. "All the hot stuff I've been thinking about the past few weeks…."

Edward looked at him unknowingly, which caused Jacob's to smirk widen. "Heh, you think you're the only one with fantasies? Guess what I've been thinking of since that night…."

Edward looked at Jacob with astonishment. For some stupid reason it had actually never occurred to him that Jacob might have felt the same way. He always seemed so cool, so suave. He had never realized that like any other human being, Jacob could have become infatuated by Edward, and not just vice versa. His heart sprang up as he opened and closed his mouth like a fish on dry land, attempting to speak.

"Really?" He finally managed. "You mean to say that you…."

"Yes Ed, all I think about is how you tied me up in my car, and how you pounded the stuffing out of me. And out of the car's backseat, mind you. The next day I went back to my car, not because I had to go somewhere, but out of nostalgia. Inspect the crime-scene, so to speak. The fluffy seat-filling was all over the place."

Edward's thoughts were all over the place, what with the new information that had suddenly revealed itself to him. He stared at Jacob as expectation crept up from his loins, while Jacob had cupped his chin with his hand, staring into the void, preoccupied with his thoughts. Finally he let go, turned around and smacked the car door shut. Finally he turned around again and stepped towards Edward. He stopped roughly a meter away from him and gazed at him intensely.

"Come back to the reservation with me, Edward."


	10. A Question of Trust

**A/N**: Some of you are going to hate me for this chapter, so let me just clarify things: this story _will_ have a happy end! With that said, I present to you chapter 10. I hope you guys enjoy it.

Thanks to those that submitted a review, and it ahs been nice to see people are liking the story. That said, I would like to encourage you to **please** **keep posting reviews!** Based on your feedback, ideas can be put forward and even incorporated.

Thanks to **Lineia **and **dantemalfoy **for providing comments!

_Warnings: slash/erotica, drama and heavy angst._

* * *

**Chapter 10 – A Question of Trust**

_Come back to the reservation with me, Edward._

The words that Jacob had just spoken resonated in Edward's head. He was stumped. In mere minutes he seemed to have gotten everything that he could have hoped for. He didn't dare fantasize too much, but he couldn't do but imagine the leather dog collar fitting snugly around Jacob's muscular neck, strapping the sternocleidomastoid muscles inside its cold embrace. He licked his lips at the sight of every breath that went through that windpipe being within the confines of that collar – making it all his; every single one of Jacob's inhalations and exhalations – _his_, Edward's. The thought alone made him hard.

Edward started nodding slowly, after which a glint of new life appeared in his eyes. "Yes Jacob, I would love that…."

Jacob's eyes widened and his lips curled into a candid smile. He stepped towards Edward with increasing haste and lunged at him to embrace his body. Their hot and damp mouths met as they kissed passionately, hands roaming around wastes, heads and asses, gripping and pulling hair and occasionally tugging urgently on clothing.

When they disconnected, they stared at each other with a frenzied hunger. Edward's eyes were bloodshot and his mouth stood crooked with animalistic drive. Jacob was, as always, beautiful in his manly splendour, but his eyes radiated an urgent need that wasn't unfamiliar to Edward: it was the same glint of passion he had seen in Jacob's eyes that night, two weeks ago. That spark in Jacob's eye dislodged a teeth-baring smile on Edward's face, which Jacob eyed with a tense, almost anxious excitement.

"Edward, get in my car." Jacob hushed with a pushy undertone in his voice. He broke off the hug and started walking backwards, turning around halfway but keeping his eyes on Edward, who was now also moving towards Jacob's car. While Jacob unlocked the doors, Edward had found his way to the passenger's seat, and after the door clicked open, Edward briskly opened it, stepped inside and closed it with a bang.

He was _never _going to move away from this spot; _never_ move away from Jacob again.

Meanwhile, Jacob had done the same, slamming his door shut too and sticking the keys into the ignition. Before he could start the engine though, Edward remembered his dream from a few nights ago. How Jacob had stopped, taken him by the arm and led him to his car. How Edward had then taken control by forcing them to exchange seats…

Edward suddenly placed a hand on Jacob's as he set out to turn the key in the ignition. Surprised, he stopped and looked at Edward. Edward merely smirked at him. "I'm driving."

Edward's voice and demeanour had turned dominant; nothing like the submissive that he had seemed to be just an hour before. Slightly shocked, staring wide-eyed at Edward, he let loose of the ignition. Shock quickly turned into submissive pleasure however: a slight smile had taken hold of Jacob's manly lips as Edward awkwardly forced Jacob onto his lap, after which he swept over to the driver's seat. Content with himself, Edward strapped himself in, and so did Jacob.

"You're back," Jacob said, looking over at Edward with a calm and content smile. Edward glanced at Jacob. "Only because of you, my pup," and he smiled wolfishly. He then turned the key in the ignition, and the engine sprang to life. Edward glanced over to Jacob, who looked surprised.

"Amazing Ed, usually I have to give it two or three turns before it does anything." Jacob admitted, still looking at the gently vibrating hood out in front.

"You know I can be persuasive, Jake." He answered, while his eyes rolled over Jacob's firm and muscular body. Jacob glanced over to Edward calmly, sporting a cheeky grin on his face: "Yes, I do."

Edward shifted into reverse, applied gas and the car creaked backwards, sending some of the smaller bits of gravel flying when the car's tires hit them. As soon as they were backed up enough, Edward hit the brake, shifted into first gear, and turned the steering wheel. He then applied gas again, thus beckoning the car forward. Not much later they found themselves on the main road, speeding towards the reservation.

As the rickety car clunked over the road at 60 miles an hour, Edward glanced over to his newfound friend. He looked his body over curiously. He had put on his leather jacket again when they left the diner; the one that made the boy look even more irresistible than he normally already was, especially with how his black, glistening hair was styled into a forward-running crest. Everything about the guy was just too delicious to bear. And oh, how Edward craved to dig his teeth into that still uncollared neck again….

"I'm done waiting Jake." Edward suddenly said, in a confident voice, still gazing out the windshield. Jacob shifted his gaze to Edward, surprised. "What?" He asked, not sure what Edward was hinting at, pulling up one of his eyebrows in confusion.

"You heard me. I want you. Come down on me, here and now." Edward replied, a cheeky but authoritative expression curling one of the corners of his mouth, but his voice remained solid as a rock. Meanwhile, his hand travelled from the gearshift to the zipper of his slightly oversized pants. As his gaze travelled back to the road in order to keep rigid control of the car's path, his hand started freeing his groin from the fabric cage that was his pants. Jacob eyed it all with surprise at first, but soon he unbuckled himself and eagerly made his way to Edward's groin. The dominance in Edward's voice had sparked the interest of Jacob Junior, encouraging Jacob's mind to submit too.

As Jacob came down on Edward and took his hardening limb into his mouth through the thin layer that was Edward's underwear, Edward moaned softly. This was this first time in two weeks that Edward had sex again, and boy did it feel good! He could feel how waves of joy gushed from his now-hard dick, flowing over into his loins and penetrating his abdominal region.

Hastily Edward pushed Jacob's head away, and stuck his tongue out from the effort of controlling both the car, which had a rather annoying tendency of veering to the right, and freeing his painfully hard dick from its cotton bonds. When he had successfully managed to do so, he ordered Jacob back onto it; Jacob gladly complied.

The full force of delight, provided by Jacob's damp oral cavity and the playful tongue that hid within, hit Edward like a brick. New, more intense waves of delight surged closer to his brain, ready to envelop it in a shroud of pleasure. He started moaning as his mind was confounded with the flood of joy that barraged his consciousness, forcing him to close his eyes.

The car veered dangerously to the right as Edward's mind slipped into subspace for a brief moment. The car hit the side-line of the road and the entire chassis bumped up and down as the tires hit the first small rocks that were strewn alongside it. Immediately Edward became aware of the present again and provided enough backpressure on the steering wheel to get, and _keep_, the car on the road. Jacob had noticed the sudden movements too, and had stopped sucking Edward in order to look up and out of the front window. His expression was one of fear.

"It's fine, all's fine, don't worry about it," Edward immediately reassured Jacob, and he caressed one of Jacob's cheeks soothingly. Jacob forgot about the sudden moment of anxiety and groaned quietly at the touch of the warm hand against his cheek; he pushed his face into the hand like a cat so as to increase the intensity of the pleasurable touch. Edward glanced at him and smiled. He was surprised by how quick Jacob was seemingly submitting and attaching himself to him. He knew they'd have a lot to work through, never mind that he himself had loads of trouble to deal with first. At least, though, this was going somewhere.

Flickers of fantasies, starring a naked slave-Jacob wearing a leather collar on a leash once again protruded his thinking, compelling Edward to dominate. He lifted his hand and cupped Jacob's chin forcefully, making Jacob direct his gaze at him, even though he himself was intently watching the road. "We're almost there my pup, why don't you keep licking that cock of mine, hm?" He suggested, glancing over at Jacob now and then. The look on Jacob's face had become one of satisfaction, which caused Edward to smile. In turn, his dick twitched forcefully: the fantasies had re-awaked it after the sudden moment of panic had caused Edward's erection to wane.

Upon seeing Jacob's content smile, Edward used the hand that cupped Jacob's chin to manoeuvre the boyish face back to his hardened limb that was twitching excitedly at the prospect of the continued joy. This time, though, Edward would make sure that the pleasure wouldn't take control of his mind like before. They didn't have such a long ride until the reservation anyway. It couldn't be more than a few minutes….

Jacob had almost enclosed Edward's dick in the embrace of his hot lips: he came down on the leaking flesh slowly and was about to close his mouth around it, when both of them heard a loud cracking noise, followed by a repetitive clunking sound. Immediately Jacob launched of Edward's cock and they stared at each other in utter bewilderment before looking around panicky. Meanwhile, the car started veering dangerously to the right again, causing Jacob to fly into a craze as he started yelling at Edward to keep the car under control.

For Edward, the next ten seconds would be remembered in a blur. The promise of renewed feelings of ecstasy had suddenly been washed away by an urgent panic. He had seen how Jacob had lurched back, and as they had stared at each other in panic, he had come to realize that something terrible had happened. The car was veering to the right, and no matter how much backpressure he gave on the steering wheel, the car was stubborn in maintaining its newfound path. Jacob was trembling and screaming in anxiety next to him, when it hit him to crash his foot onto the break. That action saved their lives.

As the car drove into the forest, crashing through bushes and branches, the sudden deceleration flung the unbuckled Jacob forwards and against the windshield. Edward, restrained by the seatbelt, felt a similar tugging on his body, but he remained seated. When the car finally crashed into a tree, Edward's world cracked into blackness.

* * *

A headache split Edward's mind in two. He shyly opened his eyes, but closed them again immediately as the stinging light caused his headache to surge to an unnameable level of pain. The sound that reached his ears was indiscriminate and confusing, a wooshing blur akin to what you hear when you put a seashell to your ear. As time trickled by, the memories of the last event slowly forced themselves into his thoughts. Slowly it came back to him what had happened, and how they had crashed into a tree beside the road. Then it hit him: Jacob had been flung forwards! Was he okay?

Immediately and without hesitation Edward opened his eyes, ignoring the searing pain that the light caused. He awkwardly undid himself from the seatbelt, which had kept him in a safe position. Slowly, the pain in his brain decreased when the light became less intense and his eyes refocused. The scene in front of him got clearer all the time as he got more accustomed to the light, but what he saw terrified him: the car was stuck in a tree. The front hood was pulverized, and scraps of metal were everywhere. There was no windshield; instead, splinters of glass adorned the dashboard.

And Jacob; Jacob was gone…. Blind panic quickly reddened Edward's world as tears appeared and rolled down his cheeks.

_What have I done?!_

New thoughts of desperation and exasperation occluded his mind as he stared panicky around the car, but there was no trace of Jacob; _his_ Jacob was gone! He banged against the door, but it was stuck. Instead he lurched forwards, gripping the edges of the windshield's frame, cutting his hands on some of the pieces of glass that were still lodged in it. The blood trickled from his hand down onto his shirt and onto his pants; soon it was everywhere. Edward didn't feel a thing, as his heart was crushed under the pain of the expectation that he had just killed his sole reason for survival.

Finally he managed to climb out of the car through the windshield, and stared down. He only saw a tree, broken shards of metal and splinters of glass strewn out in front of him. Upon closer inspection though, he finally saw it: blood, and it wasn't his. There were several specks on the front hood, in front of the front passenger's seat. Edward jumped forward, or at least he went as fast as his aching body could carry him. The heart-numbing emotional pain that he was enduring was now slowly making room for physical pain, and so he felt the sting of the wound on his hand, and as he moved his knee, he felt how his muscles were burning angrily. He looked down on it, and saw how a small metal scrap had tucked itself neatly into his kneecap. He winced, and pulled it out with a firm tug that made him yelp. He then refocused on his duty: Jacob was the only truly important thing right now. And so he coped with the pain while creeping forward, until he reached the edge of the front hood on the passenger's side of the car.

_Jacob!_

Edward's eyes widened in horror: in front of him, laid out on the soft, lush grass of the forest, was the body of his beloved, muscular friend. He lay like a baby, curled up in a foetus position. A series of small wounds adorned his youthful forehead; no doubt caused by the glass of the windshield as he was flung through it when the car hit the tree. His pants were dirty and his hair had lost its neat crest. His jacket was torn at several places, one of which was all along his right arm; blood seeped out of a torn-up sleeve, and collected into a pool at his right hand that coloured the damp forest floor wine-red.

Edward stood frozen solid, all thoughts were crushed together into a ball that tumbled down a mountain, cleaning out his consciousness from all but the thought that Jacob might be dead. The way he lay there on the ground; he looked so calm and peaceful. Tears gathered beneath Edward's eyes and started streaming down his cheeks freely.

A few moments passed, and his rigid muscles gave way to the throbbing hurt he felt in his chest. He stumbled forward, falling off the front hood to land next to his beautiful friend. He curled up beside him, touched his cheek: it was still warm. He eyed his chest, and saw movement. Instantly relief engulfed his worried-to-death brain as he realized that Jacob was alive. Knowing this he rolled up Jacob's sleeve to inspect the damage. As soon as he touched it though, and started jerking the sleeve up along Jacob's arm, Jacob winced, and breathed heavily. Edward quickly let go as a smile bared his teeth. Jacob was still conscious!

"Jacob, do you hear me? You're going to be okay, you hear me? Everything will be fine. You are _okay_!"

Edward nearly cried the words, choking up as he spoke the last of them. Jacob's face seemingly relaxed momentarily before tensing up in a new grimace. Edward looked upon it, terrified, as he saw how Jacob slowly opened, closed and reopened his mouth, frowning and cringing all the while with pain.

"Ed, is that you?" he finally managed to utter, but his words were soft and imbued with a lifelessness that struck terror in Edward's heart.

"Yes my pup, it's me, Edward, you're going to be fine, okay? You're _fine_!"

Jacob winced at the words, groaning under his breath. Edward stood up, hands in his hair with growing panic. He eyed Jacob with an increasing sense of helplessness. His friend was in pain and he had no idea how to help, and since he didn't have a cell phone, he had no possibility to call anybody either. Instead, he slumped down next to Jacob again, a new flood of tears falling down his youthful face, wetting Jacob's shirt as they landed onto it.

_Dear god, what have I done…._

In his confusion, Edward started mumbling soothing phrases and words of hope, but his own state of mind deteriorated with every second. Soon he found himself back in that winter night, when all hope seemed to have fleeted and all that he was, was but a vessel of unnecessary warmth in a cold environment that was hell-bent on extinguishing his fire.

He looked up from Jacob's face and stared into the unwelcoming, dark forest ahead of him. It would be so easy to just go in there and disappear forever, never having to think about all this pain and suffering again. He clenched his eyes shut and drooped his head; No, he couldn't think like that, not now, when his friend was lying so badly hurt in front of him. He'd have to stay sane and alive, at least for Jacob's sake.

Precious minutes past. As time crept forward, Edward's mind calmed down, and he found peace in the current situation. The quietness enabled some of his cognitive processes to pick up some speed again, and bits and pieces of his thinking were slowly restored to some modicum of functionality again.

_Doesn't Jacob have a phone with him?_

He kicked himself for not having thought about this sooner… Jacob was a modern teenager and was sure to have at least a simple Nokia with him. He soon found himself bending over Jacob, searching the pockets of his pants and jacket; indeed, he did have a phone with him. A simple Nokia was stuck in the back pocket of his pants, and fortunately the keypad wasn't locked. Edward quickly fumbled in his jacket's pocket and managed to fish out Brad's number; he would know what to do.

The phone rang. Edward started walking in circles, impatient for hearing Brad's voice. Suddenly the line sprang alive: "Hello?"

"Brad? It's Edward, I need your help!" Edward immediately replied, his voice sounding unnerved with excited dread.

"Calm down, Edward, and tell me what happened." Brad sounded worried, but being the man he was, he was goal-oriented and wanted to know what situation he might expect. Edward, in reply, told of the car crash and how Jacob seemed to be badly hurt, that he needed quick medical attention. Brad gave some quick instructions, which Edward followed, and to which Brad sighed with seeming relief.

"Okay, don't worry, Jacob will be fine. His pulse is strong. He probably has a few flesh wounds, but nothing they can't fix at the local hospital. I'll be right over. Where exactly are you?"

Edward was taken aback by that question. Where were they? Such a simple question, yet Edward had no idea.

"Erm, we are along the road between Forks and the reservation, about five minutes away from it, by car."

It was quiet for a few moments before Brad spoke again. "Right, I'll be on my way. I'd rather not have you leave Jacob for too long, but whenever you think you hear a car coming, walk over to the road. If it's me I'll be able to spot your location, understand?" Edward affirmed the instruction, and both of them hung up.

Satisfied with the result of the call, Edward was surprised to hear grumbling sounds coming from behind him, so that he turned around to Jacob. Jacob was trying to sit up, supporting his body with his seemingly unwounded left arm. His face was tensed up, no doubt because of the pain that permeated his body but that he forced himself to ignore. Immediately Edward crushed back next to Jacob and helped him sit up.

"Jake, stay put, you're only tiring yourself out," Edward commented worriedly. Jacob groaned in pain as he let himself rest against Edward. He panted lightly, and gazed at Edward. His forehead was shiny with a thin film of sweat.

"Ed, you'll stay with me through all of this, right?" He asked in a quiet though confident voice. Edward's eyes became wet with regret again as he nodded and patted Jacob's back.

"I will be here Jacob, don't you worry. I might have to go now and then for a few seconds, because I'm expecting somebody to arrive who can take better care of you than I can, but I'll be here for you, Jake." Jacob smiled in response and groaned appreciatively, closing his eyes meanwhile. Edward listened attentively for signs of cars, but there was nothing so far. He then looked back down at Jacob, who was calmly resting against his arms.

After a little while, sounds of a nearing car in the distance became vaguely audible. Edward's heart jumped up upon recognizing it between the chirping of birds and surges of wind that made the leaves rustle restlessly. He looked at Jacob and softly patted his back.

"Hey Jake, I hear a car coming so I ought to check if it's Brad, the guy I called up to help us. I'll be right back, hopefully with him." Jacob opened his eyes, and mumbled an "okay", wincing as Edward laid him back onto the ground. When he was back onto the ground and Edward had once again reassured him, then turned around to leave for the road, Jacob propped himself up using his unharmed elbow and turned to see Edward stumble over branches to get back to the road.

Edward soon breached the lining of trees along the road and looked sideways hurriedly, to see if anything useful was coming his way. The road was almost completely deserted; there were only some birds a slight distance away. The noise of the car became more distinct with time however, and soon he saw a pick-up truck appearing from around a corner.

Edward squinted to try and get a closer look of the car, but at that distance Edward couldn't be entirely sure. Not much later the car was close enough for Edward to recognize the fast-moving vehicle as Brad's car, upon which Edward's heart skipped a beat from relief. Not much later the car had pulled over and had parked right beside him. The door flung open and a worried Brad got out in an instant, slamming the door shut behind him and locking it. "Where's Jacob, Edward?"

Edward gave a brief account of Jacob's seemingly improving medical situation while he led Brad to the crash site. Once they had arrived there, they found Jacob still propped up on his unharmed elbow.

"You are Jacob, I presume. I'm Brad. Now, let me look at you…."

Brad kneeled down next to Jacob, but Jacob seemed reluctant to be touched by Brad. He looked Brad over with a hint of mistrust, after which he looked at Edward with a questioning expression. Edward nodded briefly. "Jacob, this is the Brad I told you about while we were at the diner. Trust me, he's a good guy." Jacob nodded in affirmation, smiled weakly and said "Hi". Brad smiled in reply and got closer.

As he touched Jacob's bleeding arm Jacob grimaced, but kept his gaze fixed on Brad's strong, hairy arms. They travelled up his forearm, to his elbow, squeezing lightly here and there and poking in other places. Most of the time Jacob didn't react particularly harshly, to Brad's content. He mumbled all kinds of stuff, but mostly his audible ponderings sounded positive, until he squeezed a particular area halfway Jacob's forearm: Jacob suddenly spasmed and yelped in pain. Brad instantly let go and frowned.

"I see. You probably bruised or, god forbid, broke your right forearm. We'd better get you to the hospital. Ed, help me lift Jacob, please?" Edward nodded and hurried over. Soon they had Jacob leaning on Brad's shoulders as slowly they made their way to Brad's pick-up truck, where they sat Jacob down in the front passenger's seat. Edward went to sit directly behind Jacob, holding his big, manly shoulders. Jacob relaxed as much as he could in response to Edward's touch, and closed his eyes momentarily. Meanwhile Brad got into the driver's seat, started the engine, and applied gas. Soon they were rolling back towards Forks at a steady 50 miles an hour. As the trip progressed, Jacob turned to Brad.

"Brad…?"

Brad glanced at him. "What is it Jacob?"

"I'm sorry for how I reacted earlier. It's a question of trust…. I needed to know from Edward, that's all; nothing personal." Brad smiled at hearing Jacob's words.

"It's okay Jake, I understand. I would have done the same. Trust, indeed, is a valuable but rare commodity that isn't easily attained. It requires work and dedication. I'm glad to see that such a bond exists between you and Edward. Me and my wife feared Edward had nobody to go to, but I'm happy to see he does." Brad glanced at Jacob and pierced his eyes as he spoke the words. In those eyes, however, and much to his dismay, Brad saw uncertainty. Jacob's sudden eerie silence didn't help much to set the mood straight, either.

Edward remained quiet also, a haze of doubt shrouding his mind once again. Jacob's silence at Brad's words worried him, and it hit him that Brad was depressingly right: it was a question of trust.

_Our bodies survived the crash, but what about the rest?_


	11. A Pup Finds Its Father

**A/N**: I figured chapter 10 might have come as a shock to some of you. Chapter 11 will turn things around, and is set out to tie up some loose ends. I hope you enjoy it, and as always, **please leave a review or two to let me know what you think**. I hear your thoughts, and can try incorporating them!

**A/N2: Update schedule:** it is my sincerest intention to update every sunday! Let's see if I can keep that pace up. In addition, I have been thinking of going back to earlier chapters and do some rewriting here and there. What do you guys think about that?

As always, thanks to **Lineia** and **dantemalfoy **for providing comments!

_Warnings: slash/erotica, BDSM sex fantasies, drama, violence, angst. Yes, it's anything and everything this time!_

* * *

**Chapter 11: A Pup Finds Its Father**

_Edward's mouth fell open in a stupefied smile out of astonishment. He blinked a few times before he got back to reality, and he uttered: "But, what about Embry?"_

_"You're right Edward. He'll never satisfy me. You will. Now fuck me. Show me that out of the ashes that is your soul you can rise again. Show me you can return to be the man that took me two weeks ago, the brutal and sadistic beast that fucked me into submission like nobody had ever done. My hole is hot and burning, craving to be cooled by your cold, hard dick."_

_Edward stared at Jacob with a dumbstruck grin. He could not believe what he was hearing; could not believe the spectacle that was unfolding before his eyes. Jacob, meanwhile, walked towards Edward, but came to a halt about a meter in front of him. He sported a smug smirk. He stood there in all his shirtless glory, eyeing Edward intently._

_"Edward, you see this muscular body?" He began. Edward, even though all that was happening got him very excited, nodded rather calmly. He was getting used to being confronted with such beauty, though that by no means diminished his appreciation of it._

_"Take a good look at this," he said, as he curled and flexed his powerful biceps. Edward stared at it hungrily._

_"And do you see these abs?" Jacob lowered his arms and proudly flexed his abs, causing the chiselled, smoothly curved muscles to be even more expressive than usual._

_Once Edward had nodded, staring silently at the muscular splendour in front of him, Jacob relaxed his muscles and walked up to Edward until he was standing right in front of him. His hot breath stroked Edward's neck deceptively when he started speaking, making Edward shudder with intimate pleasure. Their noses nearly touched, making it hard for Edward not to lurch for Jacob's neck. The pulsating veins, the alternately flexing and relaxing sternocleidomastoid muscles, the deliciously sweet smell that came from his aftershave were all so provoking. Edward managed to restrain himself._

_"Well, Edward, that powerful exterior which you see is only a husk, waiting to be sadistically torn off and ripped apart by the man who dares stand up to it. Will you be that man, Edward? Will you be the man to tear it off, and reveal the quivering, little boy, who sits fearful in a corner? Fearful to be beaten, but begs for it nonetheless?" Edward merely gulped. Jacob continued._

_"It begs to be smacked across the face, thrown down to the floor, so that blood comes down its nose. It wants to be kicked, and then kicked again…." Edward gulped harshly as shards of broken memories became whole again. Jacob kept going._

_"…and then, when it thinks it's all over, commanded to its feet by its master, it wants to be grabbed by its collar, smacked across the face and hurled down to the floor again…." After having been mercilessly thrashed by anger, slivers of memories reconfigured, trying to fit together so as to form the complete picture that they once were. Slowly, more and more pieces fit._

_"…and when he is down to the floor, he wants to be bound and gagged, kicked and beaten again and again with rough slaps and the whip. And then finally, his Master opens him up with a butt plug and a dildo or two, to prepare his hole for an assault that he will remember for weeks to come. He will be fucked senseless. Fucked harshly but deliciously, so that from all this humiliating pain rises a phoenix, so powerful and so strong that it confounds the small, trembling shadow of what was but a kid. And when he reaches his climax and cums uncontrollably, spurred onward by the beating of his master, he finally finds himself back in that corner; cold, dark, alone…."_

_Jacob couldn't finish his increasingly exciting monologue. As the last splinters of memories had come together, Edward had been reminded of his deepest pains. He saw the living room of his old home; he saw his mother on the couch and his siblings scattered around the room. He saw his father in front of him. He felt the pangs of fear that preceded the painful blows that were delivered to him. And finally, he remembered how nobody had done anything to help him. How nobody lifted a finger when his father had slapped him, pushed him down to the floor, kicked him repeatedly and finally brutally lurched at his collar and, in a blur, threw him down the steps of the porch. He remembered how he landed on the cold mud of the driveway._

_A cannonball shot through Edward's heart at the memories, so that even though Jacob was mid-sentence, Edward couldn't do but run away. He ran out of Jacob's room, through the kitchen, out of the house, and towards the main road. He heard Jacob's masculine voice call for him in the distance, but he couldn't care less about it now. The avalanche of awakened emotions spurred him onwards, and no person could make him stop. He didn't know whereto he was even running, nor did he know why. He only kenw that he needed to get away and be alone._

_Then Edward slowed down, his eyes widening in horror as he realized what plan might rid him of the pain that he had been feeling subconsciously for so long. His fists clenched and he grimaced at the thought._

_He could kill his father…._

Edward woke up in a fit, the dream still stuck in his mind like a fly sticks to glue. Hazily he looked around and remembered that they were at the hospital. Brad and him had taken Jacob to first aid after the car crash, to check whether he had broken or bruised his right arm. There were many people, however, and they had been waiting for a while now after having been referred to a specialized ward. He must have fallen asleep for a few minutes.

He looked sideways, where Jacob was seated. He seemed bored out of his wits, but he looked rather uneasy to. Of course, being in a hospital made nobody particularly happy, but the poor boy seemed lost. Edward remembered the icy silence in the car after Brad had talked about trust, and a pang of fear emerged in Edward's heart: had he lost his bond with Jacob? Had he just thrown out his chance to be happy? His thoughts lingered around those questions, feeling increasingly unnerved and lost. He'd have to find a way to repair their bond if he wanted to continue anything with Jacob, but how do you go about doing something like it? He was tempted to think _Go ask your father_, but that was an impossibility.

The thought of his father caused Edward to think back to his dream. The notion that killing his father might help him feel better only served to increase his trepidation. Is that what he wanted? Could he even do it? He shook his head in annoyance; he didn't see how he could kill somebody. He'd have to truly despise somebody, and even then the idea of killing seemed as from a different world.

As he mulled over these fresh ideas and questions, he glanced sideways into the corridor, and he saw him: his father. Edward's pupils dilated as his eyes widened in a mix of dread and fear, and feelings of fright and betrayal slowly resurfaced after having been stirred up by the dream.

_Fuck… my father is a doctor at this godforsaken hospital._

Edward started feeling increasingly anxious and panicky, his thoughts accelerating with every step that his father took in his direction. He hadn't spotted Edward yet, instead staring intently at medical documents that had been given to him by a nurse. She walked right beside him with a neutral expression on her face, motioning with her hands as she was explaining the details of the records she had handed over.

Edward looked around the waiting room nervously, fidgeting with the hem of his T-shirt. He could feel how cold sweat was starting to break out and roll down his sensitive flanks. Jacob was sitting just to the left of him, and on Jacob's other side sat Brad. He had bought himself a coffee, which he was drinking silently. Both of them looked into the space in front of them, thoughts in a completely different place. They were completely unaware of the approaching danger.

Edward became increasingly fidgety until, finally, he couldn't take the pressure anymore. He stood up hurriedly, so that Jacob and Brad looked at him in surprise. "Anything wrong?" Brad asked calmly, his manly voice resonating satisfyingly in Edward's chest. He looked over to the ward his father was coming down from, unable to hide a glint of panic in his eyes when he saw his white-clothed parent approach. Brad frowned and looked in the direction Edward had looked he could turn back and ask what's wrong though, Edward declared to have to go to the toilet: he started stepping away hastily.

In the meantime, Dr. Cullen had come to a halt at the entrance to the waiting room. He was still staring at the documents while the nurse kept on blabbering. Edward could hear, as he walked away, how she then finally shut up, and walked away. Then he heard the voice of his father, and worry struck him like a dagger to the heart: "Next patient… Jacob Black?"

_Fuck_

The tiny hairs in his neck righted themselves and he felt sweat break out on his forehead.

_Fuckfuckfuck, he'll recognize him!_

He stopped and turned around swiftly, just in time to see Brad and Jacob stand up. He watched how his father turned to them and extended his hand, a smile forming on his pale face. Jacob reciprocated the feelings and gestures gladly, it seemed.

Jacob's and his father's eyes met.

His father stopped dead in his tracks.

Jacob stopped in response, looking unsure of himself.

Both their hands were hanging awkwardly in mid-air, not high enough to accept the handshake, but not low enough that the failed attempt at politeness could be brushed off as something else. The smile on his father's face disappeared instantly, while his hand slowly dropped back to a more neutral position. He was now staring fixatedly at. Tiny arteries in his eyes betrayed his father's growing anger and confusion. Edward could only think that he had recognized Jacob as the guy he had kissed with, that night, in front of the house.

The hand that held the medical records loosened, so that the folder fell to the ground. The waiting room's floor turned white as the thick folder hit the floor and the medical documents that it contained spread to all of its corners. Most patient's eyes in the room were now fixed on his father.

After a few moments of silence, he finally spoke; a voice, imbued with anger borne out of humiliation, trembled in a way that Edward remembered from two weeks ago.

"You."

Brad looked increasingly perplexed at the turn of events. Edward could see how he was about to say "Excuse me?" but was rudely cut short by his father, who pointed at Jacob with a trembling hand. The poor boy obviously had no idea what was going on, and the same could be said for Brad; both of them might have heard Edward's and other's stories about his father, but it was obvious they had never actually _met_ his father before. They probably weren't aware that _this_ man was in fact Edward's father.

Edward had no idea what to do. Pangs of panic raced up and down his spine. They grabbed his stomach and intestines, making him nauseous; grabbed his heart, making him tremble in guilt; grabbed his brain, confusing him utterly. As if nailed to the floor, he stood unmoving with eyes wide-open in fear of what might happen if he didn't go and intervene. The memories of the blows that had befallen him at his father's hands, however, caused his instinct to yell at him to not come even one step nearer to his father: the source of all his fear and hurt; the one man that had humiliated and abused him more than anybody had ever done.

Thus contradictory feelings of pain, guilt and fear spread through Edward's mind like fire spreads in a wooden hut; the flames lick the roof angrily before they lurch at it destructively and tear it down completely.

"You are that boy… I recognize you from that evening." Carlisle's hand was trembling with anger as he was seemingly reliving the memories. Edward watched from his position how his father was about to explode, and suddenly he realized something that hadn't crossed his mind before: his father's memory of the event was that of a trauma. The pain he himself felt at being thrown out of his parental home probably equalled the pain his father was living through every single day, knowing his son was _that_, which his religion so stubbornly rejected. Edward had an epiphany: his father was in as much pain as he was himself.

_But that doesn't excuse his acting! A father is supposed to love his children above everything!_

_Right?_

Edward looked on as the scene unfolded before him, still too conflicted between feelings of terror and feelings of responsibility towards Jacob to spring into action.

"You poisonous rat, you who destroyed my family with your disgusting habits and lifestyle!" his father exclaimed, badgering Jacob with his words. He was still pointing at Jacob threateningly, his eyes fiery with wrath and his mouth twisted from anger. Jacob was completely paralyzed with fright; he had no idea where this was coming from, or even who this doctor was or what he wanted from him. "You burn in hell, boy, like that demented son of mine!"

The whole waiting room was now focused on the scene in the doorway. Everybody kept silent as the stream of insults increased in both extremeness and the volume in which Carlisle spoke them. To Edward's astonishment, even Brad, the always so proud and manly man was shut right up by Carlisle's tirade which covered all of gay existence and rights, denouncing them in public for everything that was revolting, disgusting or criminal in ethical, moral or legal sense. Some nurses had also gathered here and there, watching how their beloved and proficient doctor went entirely nuts. Edward could only wonder how this event would be reflected on later. With a bit of luck, he would be kicked out of his job, though he feared the effect on the rest of his family. Why he cared, he didn't know – they hadn't cared for him, had they?

Coming out of his ruminations, he noticed how his father's eyes were red with excitement and his forehead glimmered in the ward's pale lights. A film of sweat had covered it as he was excitedly motioning with his arms and the veins in his neck seemed to be so full of blood that they could pop any minute now. The entire event brought back memories, as the dream he had had just ten minutes before resurfaced. With a resounding "bang" he was back in his parent's house, thrown about and kicked harshly by his father. Tears started to stream down his cheeks at his memories of loss and broken love. For just a day he had felt elated and so happy, and now he was recast back in misery.

_Will there be no end to my suffering?_ Edward asked himself, his mind confounded by increasing amounts of desperation and panic. Right at that moment, when all life seemed to collapse once again right in front of Edward's eyes, it finally happened: Carlisle said one thing too many: "I will _not_ treat such a homosexual slut as you!"

That statement entered Edward's brain and stuck like a splinter in a fleshy foot.

_I will not treat such a homosexual slut as you._

The words milled around in Edward's mind, bouncing of the inside of his skull, like bullets ricocheting, endlessly increasing in volume until a few essential words were the only intelligible pieces of information:

_Will. Not. Treat. You._

Those words landed on top of the already humongous pile of insults delivered to him by his father. It balanced quietly at the very top for a moment, but didn't stay there; its balance shifting too much to one side, it caused the entire mountain of derogatory statement and insults to topple over. The limit had been reached. Edward erupted inwardly. After all he had endured, this was it; this man had shouted at him countless times, made fun of him and had criticized him his entire life, until finally he had abused him and thrown him out. Edward had seemingly gotten to some kind of terms with those memories but nobody…

…**_Nobody_**_..._

…refuses Jacob. _His_ Jacob. Jacob, the guy that showed him a new life once, and had given him back that life twice, once in thought and once for real. Edward was not going to give up on it now. To hell with fright. To hell with fear. To hell with terror, and to hell with helplessness. He was Edward, and he was proud of being the gay, domineering sadist that he was – he would be all that and more for Jacob. And nobody, certainly not his beloved father, would stand in the way.

_Jacob_

The name alone made shivers of happiness run up and down Edward's body. Edward snapped out of his panicky trance. He resurfaced anew, reborn out of the dreaded fear that had grasped him over the past few minutes and had him bound and gagged, using his own anxiety as his prison. Now, finally, the world came back to Edward, imbued with a new sense of responsibility – towards himself, but first and foremost towards Jacob.

He saw how his father made to turn around and pace away angrily. Brad seemingly also snapped back to reality, having stared at the smaller man with eyes wide in surprise, too dumbstruck to say anything. Now that the shouting was over, he came back to life, but only very slowly. He turned to Carlisle and was about to say "Excuse me?" like before, but he was too slow. Jacob was still affixed to the floor, and was watching how Carlisle had turned and paced away, eyes still wide and wet with surprise.

Carlisle was already some meters away from them when Edward started pacing hurriedly in his direction, each step thundering on the cold linoleum hospital floor. With every step he took he felt his anger grow. A newfound determination had sparked and enflamed his heart, which was now beating excitedly at the prospect of making his father submit to his wrath. With every step, also his determination increased.

"_He could kill his father."_

The last seconds of his dream came back to him as his eyes narrowed and his expression darkened. He felt how his hands itched with excitement, craving to beat down and break something.

Edward paced faster and faster towards his father. Nothing else in the world existed at the moment beside he himself, his father, and his itching fist. Edward was guided to his parent as if he was on a path of light that led him straight to his father's jaw; the rest of the world was made invisible, darkened by an impenetrable shadow. He vaguely heard an alarmed Brad call his name, a faint "what are you doing, Edward!" following him from behind. A shallow "Ed?" coming his way from the manly voice of Jacob…

_Jacob_

The thought of his light-brown coloured god only served the purpose of making him _more_ determined to show his father what's what. The memory of how his father had shouted and refused to treat Jacob further provoked him, like throwing petrol on an already blazing fire. Patients in the waiting room now had all their eyes on him as he made his way into the ward, pushing away nurses that gaped at him in astonishment.

Edward's senses entered a vacuum as he closed in and prepared himself for attack. He felt his heart beating furiously in his chest; he heard the thuds of his boots on the hospital floor; he saw the back of his father's head getting closer all the time. The triangle of stimuli swallowed him whole as he let rage grab a good hold of his mind, drowning out all other senses.

He started raising his fist as he quickly closed in the dreaded doctor. He was only two meters away from his father when he called for him: "father!" he bellowed loudly and decisively, his eyes radiating complete wrath and hopeless anger that could only end in pain. Nurses and patients watched in horror as they saw father and son reunited after more than two weeks.

His father turned at the sound of his son's voice. In shock he looked around as he slowed his pacing. Right when they made their first eye contact in a while, Edward's strong right fist hit his father's jaw with a speed and accuracy that shocked Brad, Jacob and all the other onlookers. A satisfying crackle emerged from the jaw, together with a pathetic whimper that didn't at all sound like his father's voice, which was normally so strong and authoritative.

Then it was silent for a moment. Still in the enduring sensory vacuum that drowned out all but a select set of stimuli, Edward witnessed how his father stumbled backwards in silence. He hit a wall, tripped over a stool and fell down, landing harshly on his back. He grimaced with the lightning pain that shot up from where his aging body hit the floor.

Edward was seething with anger; he didn't hear how his father panted, or how he whimpered with pain. He didn't hear how nurses had broken down in panicked chatter, or how one of them had ran to call for a guard, nor did he pay any attention to the patients – Brad and Jacob among them – that gaped and discussed the spectacle in the ward among themselves.

No, for Edward only one thing counted: to get even with his father. He was lying about four meters away from him, in the middle of the hospital's hallway. He had rolled there awkwardly after having tripped over the stool, clutching his jaw while wincing from the throbbing sensation that served as a reminder of his son's fist.

Slowly but surely Edward started in the direction of his father, who had now realized that his attacker was, in fact, his son. He stared at him with bewilderment that was slowly turning into anger, as he understood what his flesh and blood had done to him. Edward noticed however that his father was not entirely sure of himself. For the first time ever, his father's iron resilience faltered. A sadistic smile curled Edward's lips as he kept approaching his victim.

Edward stared into those dark eyes, set in that pale face, and he saw shimmers of fear. It reminded him of Jacob's fear and how delicious he had found that, though this was different: the current surges of sadistic pleasure that Edward felt, were from a very different origin. While previously they had been sexual, his current sadistic streak arose from the wish to terrorize as a result of incredible fury and hate towards this pathetic little man that _dared_ call himself his "father".

As these thoughts increasingly forced themselves upon Edward's with hate intoxicated mind, Carlisle had lost the bewildered expression on his face. Instead it had turned to full-blown fear: he recognized the anger on his son's face and had seen the tightly clenched fist. While these things were frightening in and of themselves, what he feared the most was the determination and focus with which his son was walking towards him. His son's face was dark with rage as his closing steps echoed in Carlisle's mind.

"That is for treating Jacob the way you did, father." Edward spoke calmly and quietly, but with an undertone so dark and sinister that it made his father tremble with axiety.

At one meter away from him, Edward once again spoke, stopping briefly before continuing on his path to his father's stomach. "And this, my father, is for what you did to _me_."

As soon as Carlisle heard that, he tried to crawl backwards, awkwardly dragging his feet along with his aching torso. Fear and panic were carved into his pale face and his eyes were wide with fright at the sight of his son closing in on him. It was to no avail: his son inched closer. He stood upright proudly, clearly enjoying the fact that he had such control over his father after fearing him for so long: his face sported a glimmer of satisfaction as his lips kept an iron grip on the weak smile that had formed previously. That grip didn't last much longer, though. Suddenly Edward's lips uncurled and locked into a crazed expression of hate.

He lashed out with his foot and hit his father in the stomach with as much force as he could muster.

His father cried in agony at the impact of Edward's boot against his stomach and intestines.

Edward was panting with the release of such anger and frustration. He silently looked at the mess that was his father, who had curled up into a foetus position and was gasping for air. It reminded him of how he himself must have looked on that dreaded night, at his parent's house.

With the majority of his fury now released, he slowly emerged from the sensory vacuum that had possessed him throughout the climax of his wrath. New sounds trickled into his consciousness when suddenly he was grabbed roughly from behind. In confusion he struggled against the hands that held his arms firmly behind his back.

"Come with me sir and you'll be fine. Now move it." A demanding voice ordered from behind. Then Brad and Jacob appeared at his sides. Brad looked utterly shocked and Jacob's eyes were wet; he had been shedding tears, apparently.

_I wonder why…._

Damp trails that no doubt would prove to be salty ran from Jacob's eyes down to his chin. A tear was still dangling from his male jaws, dancing around, a slave to the bobbing of Jacob's head as he and Brad accompanied Edward and the security guard down the hallway.

"My god, Edward…" Jacob started, sounding both perplexed and amazed. His expression was a mix of worry and gratitude. "I heard what you said after you hit the doctor; we all heard."

Jacob's head drooped and he sighed briefly. He then resumed in a quieter voice: "The first punch you gave him – you gave it in my name."

Jacob got teary-eyed once again as he looked at Edward. Brad was listening attentively. His eyes widened and a vague smile formed under his beard when he heard Jacob's words. Jacob continued: "No matter the hurt he caused you, the way he abused you… God Edward, the story you told me back in the diner – and still your first punch was to avenge the way he treated me. _Me_."

Edward wanted to say something, but they reached a small office and Edward was pushed into it roughly, while the voice behind him barked at Brad and Jacob to stay outside. The door slammed shut behind Edward as he heard Jacob calling his name one final time, before he found himself dumped onto a chair in front of a desk. His captor finally revealed himself to him as he let his arms go and walked over to the other side of the desk. A burly security guard stood in front of him. He took a seat in a lush, leather chair. Edward looked at the door, which had a window in it. Written in mirrored letters, it said "security" on the outside of the door. Outside he could also see Jacob pacing back and forth worriedly. Edward gulped at the sight and felt how guilt emerged from the depth of his being and embraced his heart at the sight of his friend.

"So what the hell did you think you were doing?" The security guard asked, yanking Edward back to reality. He was still a bit dazed by the adrenaline rush subsiding, making him feel fatigued. Also, his fist hurt quite a bit. In action movies the punching always seemed so painless….

Edward looked at the guard sheepishly. "I was hitting my father, officer."

The guard pulled up an eyebrow at that answer. It evidently wasn't what he had been expecting. "You were what? You were hitting your _father_? _That_ was your father? Dr. Cullen?" Edward nodded in annoyance. _Geez this guy is slow_.

"And why were you hitting your father?" He still had that eyebrow pulled up, his face a mix of curiosity and confusion. Edward sighed and looked at the floor briefly before answering. "That is a long story. I'm not sure if you want to hear it all."

The guard merely folded his arms and leaned back in his chair, which creaked noisily. He remained silent for a moment, clearly trying to come up with a wise-ass rebuttal. "Well, I'm afraid you'll have to spill it for your own good. Just give a summary. If you don't, you might lose a court case. At least, you do realize your father might press charges, don't you?"

Edward chuckled at that thought, which angered the guard. "What's so funny?" he retorted, annoyed at Edward's pleasure, which seemed to be at his expense. Edward stopped chuckling but retained a hearty smirk that spread his lips triumphantly. "I don't think he'll have the guts to do so, and if he has, he's not only the most barbaric father that walked the earth, he'd also be the stupidest one."

The guard seemed really confused now, as his answer to Edward's brief explanation made all to clear: "Huh?". He gaped at Edward for a moment before he recollected himself.

"Listen punk, you need to start talking. All this sounds disturbing and very wrong to me, and I need to know what's going on! Otherwise I'll just charge you with wasting police time and you'll risk going to jail. Is that what you want?" The guard's expression was authoritative and his words had been delivered confidently and resolutely.

Edward responded with an annoyed "fine", before giving a short account of what had transpired in the Cullen mansion over two weeks ago. The guard visibly switched between several emotions as Edward lay open his heart to him; the words struck hard and deep, so much was obvious.

At the end of his tale, both of them remained silent. The guard cupped his chin, as if lost in deep thought. After a few moments of staring at Edward intently like that, he sighed and relaxed, letting his hands rest on the arm rests of the chair. "Right, I think I know what to do. Do you have any bruises or injuries left from that evening?"

Edward didn't take very long to pull his shirt up, where several bruises followed the lines of his ribs. The guard shook his head at the sight. "You stay here." He said, and got up. He went through the door, which he locked behind him. Edward stared through the small window in the door, where he saw the guard talking to Brad; Jacob was absent.

_He is probably getting his arm looked at_, Edward thought, hoping that Jacob would be okay. Meanwhile he kept watching Brad and the guard.

The guard seemed shocked at the things that Brad was telling him. Perhaps the guard was looking for witnesses, or people that could corroborate his story? They didn't stay together for long, though, as Edward could see. The guard left, leaving Brad alone who promptly went to the door. He looked sideways and Edward noticed how the door started rattling. Brad was trying to open it, but without much success. He then looked through the window, and tried to say something; as the voice was muffled, it was difficult to hear what exactly he was trying to say. He held up a thumb though, so Edward guessed he was trying to make him feel better. Edward merely smiled in response.

Suddenly Brad looked sideways again and hurriedly left the door. The guard appeared and unlocked the door, stepping inside in the company of a doctor. "Edward, this is Dr. Jackson. I asked him to examine your bruises." Edward nodded and took his shirt off, waiting for the doctor to start his inspection. The latter crouched beside Edward and stared at the purple marks on Edward's chest and abdominals. Finally he prodded them and pinched them lightly, which caused Edward to wince.

The doctor looked up at him. "Still painful, is it?" Edward nodded meekly. The guard leaned onto the table, and stared at the both of them. "So Doc, what do you think? Is this presentable evidence?"

The doctor cupped his chin and thought for a moment before speaking. He was choosing his words very carefully, it seemed. As he started talking, he kept eyeing the bruises intently.

"I won't lie to either of you; it's difficult. The car crash left some marks of its own, but these can be easily recognized as being fresh. Similarly, these older bruises can be recognized as being old, but it's harder to tell _exactly_ how old they are. They could indeed be about two weeks old in my professional opinion." Edward noticed how the guard smiled at that. Dr. Jackson noticed it too. "Don't get your hopes up, though. I'm sure others could argue that they are not _that_ old, so that they could have been sustained in a different manner. General clumsiness, perhaps."

"Oh come on!" Edward immediately retorted. The guard hushed him to be silent, and turned his attention back to the doctor. "So, do we have a presentable case or not?"

The doctor thought again for a few moments. Finally the Doctor's final words came: "It's risky, but I think you do". The guard sighed in relief and looked over to Edward with a stern face before looking back at the doctor.

"Thank you doctor, for your help." The doctor nodded curtly and left, at which point the guard shifted his gaze back to Edward. "Right Edward, here's what I'm going to do. First I'll take some pictures. Keep that shirt held up high for me, will you?"

The guard proceeded to take a camera from a drawer of his desk, and crouched beside Edward. The recorded click-sounds that were supposed to make the digital camera sound like a professional reflex camera were hollow and cheap. But, it got the job done, and soon a set of photos was logged in a new file that the guard kept on his computer. The guard stayed seated as he returned his attention to Edward.

"Okay Edward, now I'm going to talk to your father. While I'm away, I will leave the door open. I trust you will stay here. Brad, who I understand has taken you in together with his wife, will be allowed entry. The same applies to your friend, Jacob. I will be back shortly." Edward nodded and smiled, uttering a weak "thank you" at the supportive words of the guard. He then left, closing the door but leaving it unlocked. Through the window Edward could see how the guard looked sideways, nodded and briefly gestured at the door. Soon afterwards the door slammed open and Brad hurried in, closing the door behind him again. He rushed over to Edward and crouched in front of him.

"Edward, how are you? Are you okay?" He spoke quickly and his face betrayed intense worry. Edward could only smile at that – at the fact that somebody was so worried about him.

"I'm okay. The guard said he was going to talk to dad. I think he's convinced of the story I told him." Brad relaxed instantly, looking highly relieved by the news. "And what about that doctor? What did he have to say?" Brad asked, still with an undertone of worry as he frowned. Edward gave an account of the doctor's examination. When he finished, Brad could not suppress a smile from brightening his, until then, moody disposition.

Now that Edward felt that Brad knew enough, he had to sate his own worry: "Brad, where is Jacob? Are they examining him?" Brad nodded, the smile still adorning his bearded face. "They took him in shortly after the guard stuffed you into this office. A doctor came to me a short while ago, though, to say that he only bruised his arm. It should heal pretty soon, but they are bandaging it and taping it in, just to be on the safe side. He should be released from the hospital very soon, probably around the same time that the guard will release you." Edward smiled at the news; he felt optimistic for the first time in a while.

"You know," Brad continued, "you shocked us both in that waiting room, but of the two of us, you shocked Jacob the most." He smiled sheepishly and looked down at the floor. "Angela and I suspected you were a strong-willed character, who wouldn't let others throw him about just like that. We saw how you healed yourself, and how you managed to cope with the insults that you had endured. We were, and still are, very proud of you. To see you take your revenge like that – for me it was a dream come true, to be honest." He looked back up at Edward and smiled. "For Jacob, however, it was shocking."

Brad stood up and walked to the office's only window and stood in front of it, peering outside before turning around. Edward looked at him, but the sun caused Brad to be nothing more but a black silhouette against a light background.

"You have a darker side, Edward. You might want to consider what it means and how to contain it. Even if I approve of the blows you gave your father, it's not something you can do at random to people you dislike. You know that, right?"

What had started as a nice pep talk was now turning into an annoyance. Edward nodded in growing irritation, and waved away Brad's worries. "How does any of this relate to Jacob?" He promptly asked.

Brad coughed and cleared his throat. "The point is this. Jacob was blown away by the fact that you hit your father in his name first, before kicking him in your own name later. It deeply impressed him. I think he feels that it shows how much you care for him. I heard what he said to you when that guard led you away; I heard the adoration in his voice. You know, he lost faith after the accident, it was written all over his face. His trust was wavering, but that bold action of yours seems to have mended things somewhat. At least, that's my interpretation." Brad shifted to lean on another leg as he acquired a more comfortable position to stand in, folding his arms in the meantime.

"I just want you to be careful, if things go further between the two of you. As physically strong as Jacob looks, a muscular body isn't always accompanied by a strong mind. To me he seems rather impressionable. Breakable even, if handled too roughly by the right person. So, be careful with him, will you? For both your sakes."

When Brad had finished speaking, the door creaked open. Both of them looked up from their conversation to stare at the opening door. The guard re-entered, smiling. "I spoke to your father, Edward. I doubt he'll cause problems for you. For as far as I'm concerned, you are free to go." Both of them smiled in response and made to leave, thanking the guard for his help. "It was my pleasure." He answered, a satisfied grin decorating his face.

They exited the cramped office, and closed the door behind them. They stood around awkwardly for a minute, not knowing what to say or where to look, when Edward spotted Jacob walking down the hallway somewhat confidently. Instantly his mood brightened and his heart surged with renewed vigour at the sight of his friend. He sported a grin that increasingly grew in size the closer he came to Edward.

When Jacob was getting close, Edward made slow steps toward Jacob. Finally, they connected in an embrace. The hugged each other long and fervently, until Brad tapped them on the shoulder.

"Guys, you're being very cute, but I think we ought to go home. I'll drive you guys back."

Brad turned around and started in the direction of the exit. Soon he stopped short to look back and see whether the two teenagers made to join him. They had disconnected and were staring at each other wide-eyed and in a trance that lasted for a minute. They broke away from it when Edward started smiling. He held a hand around Jacob's waist and guided him toward Brad. Together the two of them strolled down the well-lit hospital hallway, Jacob locked in Edward's embrace, featuring smiles and eyes filled with satisfaction. As they reached the hospital's main entrance and the evening sun stroked their cheeks, Brad went to fetch the car. Soon he came rolling down the driveway and stopped in front of the two guys. Edward opened the backseat door and looked at Jacob lovingly.

"Come on my pup, time to go back to the reservation".


	12. Enter My Lair

**A/N**: This chapter contains **a lot** of explicit BDSM sex. If you don't like that, don't read it and skip down to the line instead.

Thanks to **Lineia** and **dantemalfoy** for providing comments!

_Warnings: Lots of highly explicit gay kinky/BDSM sex, drama_

* * *

**Chapter 12: Enter my Lair**

Brad drove down the sandy path that led into the reservation. By now it was dark, and the murky lights of the few streetlights that lined the sandy road were hardly adequate to light it. Brad therefore drove slowly and cautiously, which served to frustrate his teenage companions.

Sitting in the back seat, they had been eyeing each other hungrily for the first two or three minutes. Soon they had started playing mischievously with each other's clothing, unbuttoning shirts, and fooling around with underwear and pants as they felt each other up.

When, however, Brad heard a zipper being pulled open slowly but steadily, he had to intervene. He had adjusted his driving mirror to get a look of what was happening in the back of the car. When he saw hands snaking down pants, and biceps and triceps flexing and relaxing interchangeably, he loudly bellowed "No sex in my car guys!" The two in the back groaned in annoyance, but stopped the quiet hand jobs until they arrived at their destination. They did hug and kiss every so often, but it hardly satisfied their _actual_ needs.

Now they were on that sandy path, driving horribly slowly. Edward had been hard since they had started driving. Before they had entered the car at the hospital he had already sported a proud semi, but as he found himself next to the muscular native and they had started horsing around, he had gotten hard quite quickly. When he had finally whispered into Jacob's ear to give him – then and there – a good hand job, his erection had become painful.

And then Brad had commanded them to stop, leaving Edward in quite a predicament: painfully hard and leaking. He ached to order Jacob to keep going, just to relieve the pressure a little bit, but he didn't dare going against Brad's reprimand. Suffice to say, he hated being subjected to Brad's "no sex in the car restriction" restriction. He had to remain in control. Submitting to somebody else's power really was not his cup of tea….

The never-ending drive down the sandy road did eventually come to an end. Edward thanked Brad heartily, and so did Jacob, for being with them all that time. Brad became a bit teary-eyed as he watched the two scamper off to Jacob's home – a small, red hut with a white door built in a small extension.

As the two stepped away from the car, tugging on each other, embracing each other kissing and fooling around, they heard how Brad set the car into motion and drove off. Then Edward stood face to face with the red hut. He slowed his pace.

"Jacob, is _this_ your home?" He asked cautiously. His words were fraught with an increasing uncertainty. Jacob had slowed together with Edward, and looked at Edward with a modicum of surprise. "Yes it is, why? I know it's not much but –" Edward cut him off.

"No, no, it's fine, it's not that. It's just that, when I came here last time, out of that house came a man in a wheelchair. He basically yelled at me to piss off." He looked at Jacob as he spoke, frowning and his mouth in a twist of worry. Jacob was a bit unsure of what to say, so he went for reassurance: "Yeah, my dad doesn't like the Cullens. He's not home now though, the elders have a meeting tonight. Whenever you do meet him, I'll be there, by your side, and we'll explain. Remember what you did to your father: there are several witnesses. I'm sure my father will love you for what you did tonight."

Jacob's pep talk helped. Edward smiled broadly as he looked at Jacob. "You have a talent of knowing what to say, you know that? First at the diner and now here." He stroked Jacob's cheek lovingly in the faint light of one of the sandy road's streetlights, after which they shared a gentle kiss.

They continued their walk to Jacob's house, embracing each other. At the door, Jacob pulled out his keys and unlocked the door, gaining them entrance into Jacob's home. They stepped inside casually, Jacob leading the way.

It was dark in the house, and somewhere a clock was ticking loudly. The two teenagers didn't hear it. As soon as they were inside, time stopped. Edward closed the door with a bang, and they found themselves in the privacy of the red house. Edward lurched towards Jacob and they connected in a passionate kiss.

They stood in place for what felt like an eternity, kissing lovingly, feeling each other up. The cold leather of Jacob's torn jacket made Edward hard again after his erection had started to wane towards the end of the car ride. Still kissing, he drew Jacob closer against him and made a point out of poking Jacob's groin with his hard dick. When he did so, he felt Jacob reciprocated his arousal and he smiled inwardly.

For Edward, it started to become unbearable very quickly. All the kissing, the feeling, the touching… everything was too damn _nice_. Deep inside him he felt how his animal stirred in the darkness. It growled threateningly and stretched its limbs, yawning before huffing loudly and getting on its feet.

Edward's beast had re-awakened.

Spurred by primitive feelings churning deep inside him, his sight coloured red with lust and passionate aggression as he felt Jacob against him. The warmth of his hot, taut body released a maddening drive that spun his thoughts into a whirlwind that had him enter a blood-red frenzy of desire. He felt like a bull being confronted with a red sheet, waved in front of him provocatively by a toreador. Edward snapped as a hunger for Jacob's body overwhelmed his sense of logic, turned his brain to mush and had his heart hammer violently in his ribcage.

Like the bull, he charged with feverish resolve.

He thrust his tongue in Jacob's mouth aggressively, overwhelming Jacob in the process.

He leaned into him heavily so as to push him backwards with increasing force, slamming Jacob into the wall, at which point he broke off the kissing and pinned Jacob's chest down with his arm and elbow.

For a moment he stared at Jacob with an intense, animalistic hunger that flashed in Edward's eyes like a thunderstorm; it made Jacob shudder, but Jacob's mouth was curled into a delighted grin. In turn, a near-friendly tinge made Edward's eyes, filled with frenzy, sparkle when he saw how his prey enjoyed the attention, but it reverted to its initial wickedness almost instantaneously. He plunged his mouth back onto Jacob's and they resumed their rough kissing.

Sensing how his dominance made Jacob hornier by the second, Edward positioned one of his legs confidently in between Jacob's, prying them apart. Jacob complied immediately, giving Edward's leg full access. He then lifted his knee so that it landed in Jacob's groin, pressurizing Jacob's balls. Jacob moaned intensely at the sensation of being handled roughly liked that; at the sensation of his crown jewels being under such direct threat. He snaked his arms around Edward's back, and pulled Edward close against him so that their hard dicks touched, grinding against each other through the fabric of their pants. They both moaned in pleasure with the mounting excitement.

As their arousal further increased, Edward backed away slightly from Jacob, commanding him: "Take that coat off." He spoke with stifling authority. Jacob rushed to free himself of the torn leather jacket, while Edward started unbuttoning his shirt. Jacob followed suit on that one, and soon they were both shirtless. Hands stroked naked backs and groped hair in a continually increasing frenzy of touching and kissing, which only ended when Edward took a rough grip of Jacob's messed-up haircut and pulled his head sideways. Jacob squealed lightly at the twinge of pain coming from the crown of his hair, combined with the threat at his balls. His squeal turned into moaning, however, when Edward moved from Jacob's mouth to Jacob's neck. He gently sucked and kissed, throwing in a gentle bite now and then.

So he made his way down Jacob's muscular neck, and when he reached his shoulder, he went up again. On his next way down, however, he was a lot more ferocious: he sunk his teeth into Jacob's proud, muscular neck, making Jacob whine with the sudden evocation of pain. Edward could feel how Jacob took a stronger hold of his back, and how his fingers buried themselves in Edward's skin. The idea of hurting Jacob like that made Edward feel surprisingly good, though; his hard cock twitched with delight, painfully grinding itself against the unforgivingly tight fabric of his underwear.

_I need to get those pants off_, Edward thought to himself, while releasing Jacob's neck from the stinging embrace of his teeth. Jacob relaxed noticeably in response, whispering a soft "Oh Edward" as his fingers loosened around Edward's back. Edward wasn't quite done yet however, and took another bite lower down Jacob's neck, eliciting a yelp from Jacob and a strained whining. Again Jacob's fingers started digging into Edward's flesh.

_"Be careful with him, will you? For both your sakes."_

Brad's words echoed in Edward's mind as he took bite after bite from Jacob's manly neck. He felt how the powerful muscles briefly spasmed, relaxed and tensed under his hot breath and sharp teeth. Edward was in control here; only _he_ could make those muscles twinge with pain, and he loved every second of it. So did Jacob, if the wet spot that had formed through his underwear and on his pants was any indication. Edward had seen it throughout the biting and had smiled inwardly: he had been hoping that Jacob was into pain.

Finally, Edward stopped assaulting Jacob's neck, which was now an angry red. He briefly looked Jacob over while he stared back at Edward. He couldn't quite make out if Jacob was smiling or not; he seemed pleased, but frightened at the same time. Had he gone to hard on him? Maybe he ought to be gentler…. He huffed. Time to get this into a more horizontal position.

"Your room…" Edward panted. They were broth breathing deeply, their chests heaving with excitement. Jacob grinned happily and motioned with his head further into the house, which was completely dark.

Edward felt a pang of nervousness as he eyed the shrouding darkness. He was about to enter a dark, wild animal's lair. He wasn't left much time to think however, as Jacob had grabbed a hold of his hand and was leading him further inward – further into the darkness and further into the animal's lair. Jacob looked back at Edward as they paced through what seemed like a medium-sized kitchen.

Right then Edward realized it: the only lair that he was entering was his own lair, and he felt how his inner beast proudly roared in defiance of its bonds. It was _his_ beast that would be set free tonight, in this house. The whole village would hear the proud growl of his animal as it lurched out of its cage, to sink its teeth and claws in his prey: Jacob.

Edward smiled calmly as the fantasies started up again. His face lighted up and his grin became wider and wider, baring his teeth when finally Jacob pushed against a door. Jacob briefly disconnected, rushed inside to switch a small desk lamp on, and then promptly returned to Edward to guide him further inside. When they were both inside, Jacob closed the door with a bang and locked it. He didn't re-join Edward, however: he leaned against the door in all his masculine splendour, hiding in Edward's shadow that was cast on him by the desk lamp.

Edward stood in the room, shirtless, glancing around as if he were a Roman gladiator surveying the Colosseum. As he inspected his surroundings, he turned his torso until he stood face to face with Jacob. Jacob was smirking, an eyebrow pulled up ever so slightly. Edward felt like he was being mocked, and being the Dominant he was, he couldn't let that go on for too long. His animal bared its teeth threateningly, and he felt inclined to do the same.

He glanced over the boy that so casually leaned against the bedroom door. The beautiful, hairless pectorals that adorned a robust set of abdominal muscles were as gorgeous as he had remembered it: he had not idealized his victim's body even one bit in even his most fantastic of fantasies. He could feel how saliva collected in his mouth and he furiously licked his lips in response. Jacob grinned in reply to that, inviting Edward forward with his glimmering eyes.

"God, you are beautiful…" Edward whispered huskily, and slowly started stepping in the direction of Jacob. With every step Edward took towards the boy, the shadow he cast on him grew bigger, and his dick grew harder. Soon Jacob was enveloped entirely in the growing darkness of Edward's shadow; he looked small and fragile compared to the size of it. It caused Edward to smile: the symbolism in it all hadn't escaped him, as he continued stepping toward Jacob.

Even as his dominant demeanour craved to cause at least _some_ pain to the beautiful man in front of him, he couldn't do but get terribly anxious at the same time. Here he was, in Jacob's room, with the guy he had craved so fiercely since that summer day where he had seen him ride that rickety bike down the streets of Forks. His legs started trembling and cold sweat broke out, making his forehead shine. After two weeks, they were reunited again. How endless had those two weeks seemed… All the hurt that had piled up over months that had him nearly crush down into oblivion; how difficult had it been to climb back out of that pit. So much had happened that it felt like he was a different person. A person with a different set of morals, ethics, ideas, cravings and desires. One of them stood right in front him, and god how he had longer for that one. Finally, after all that time, he was where he wanted to be.

Finally he stood right in front of Jacob.

Finally he reached for Jacob with trembling hands.

Finally he took a firm grip of his voluminous shoulders.

Finally he embraced him in a tight hug and poured all the warmth of his love into him.

Finally he felt relaxed. Happy. Calm.

Jacob reciprocated Edward's every move. Their breathing synchronized and deepened to a quiet, relaxed rate. In that tight embrace, Edward felt truly loved. An urge to cry forced itself upon him, but he withstood it. As their hug loosened, they both leaned back a bit so that they could look at each other in the eyes. Jacob's eyes glimmered with loving passion; Edward's were wet with happiness.

They stood immoveable for what seemed like eternity, taking up each other's gazes, drowning in the pools that were their eyes. They both smiled a gentle smile, a loving warmth radiating from their face. A satisfied silence engulfed them.

"I'm so happy to be here, you have no idea," Edward finally whispered calmly after a deep sigh. Jacob nodded quietly while his smile widened into a grin that bared his teeth.

_Still blindingly white_, Edward thought as he saw Jacob's teeth. He moved one of his hands to grab Jacob's neck, and massaged it quietly. His inner beast had calmed down, and he was enjoying the gentle affection that he had missed so much in his life. Jacob closed his eyes, moaning lowly at Edward's quiet touch. His grin disappeared and turned into a quiet expression of satisfaction.

He became weak and lifeless in Edward's hands, the sensation in his neck making Jacob go almost limp with intimate bliss. He leaned into Edward's embrace so that their foreheads touched. In response, Edward tightened his embrace and started to lightly scratch Jacob's back with his free hand. Jacob moaned in turn, letting his head fall down onto Edward's shoulder. His breathing had become a bit faster; Edward merely sighed deeply at how calm and relaxed he felt. He couldn't remember feeling so _one_ with himself and his environment; so one with another person.

In that feeling of unity, his animal re-awoke. A guzzling longing for more and the helpless boy leaning against him turned him on. His erection had slightly waned in the last ten minutes, but it was promptly reawakened at the thought of what he could do next.

"Ready for more?" Edward whispered cheekily into Jacob's ear. Jacob responded with a calm sigh, and lifted his head with a smile. "Always, Edward." He replied, and his smile broadened further.

Edward grinned. "Well then."

He rotated his torso, dragging Jacob along with him, and stepping towards the bed. He plummeted forward so that they both ended up on it, Jacob on his back and Edward on top, now eyeing him as hungrily as before. The look on Edward's face had truly reverted to a devilish pleasure that Jacob could remember from two weeks ago. The threat in Edward's eyes made him completely hard, and he gulped.

"Wait, Ed…" he suddenly interjected. Edward looked a bit surprised. "What? I thought you were ready…"

Jacob nodded. "I am, but…" His face turned red. "I bought some toys a few days ago. I got curious about BDSM and wanted to try some stuff out… I just thought you might want to take a peak?"

Edward huffed as he considered the words. Jacob looked rather ashamed of himself, his face all red like that. Edward couldn't do but feel respectful for how quickly Jacob had adopted his submissive tendencies and had acted on them, and he smiled warmly.

"Sure, show me what you've got. Toys will only make it hotter." He spoke as he got off Jacob's thighs and went to sit on the bed.

Jacob grinned boyishly and sprang up, ran to his desk and opened a drawer. He took out a plastic box. Already could Edward hear the rattle of chains inside, making him infinitely curious to all the stuff that he could subject the boy too now that the toys came into play.

He stood up and joined Jacob at his desk. Jacob had started pulling out all the stuff he had, including a nipple chain, a fairly large butt plug, an even bigger dildo, a ball of firm-looking, natural rope, a ball gag, some cock rings in various sizes, a blindfold and a heap of clothespins. Finally Jacob reached over the desk and reached for an aluminium pipe, about one centimetre in diameter, and lay it down next to the other toys.

"This is it." He spoke, and looked at Edward with a hopeful smile. Edward couldn't help himself: he grinned from ear to ear.

"You like all this stuff?" he asked Jacob, who nodded furiously. "Yeah I do… At least, I wasn't very successful in hitting or binding myself. I was hoping you would do that." He said somewhat submissively, ducking Edward's gaze as his cheeks became almost vermillion.

Edward patted Jacob's back. "No reason to be ashamed, Jake. It's quite amazing that you bought this stuff already so quickly, and I'll gladly use your toys on you." He smiled pleasantly and waited for Jacob to meet his gaze. He didn't have to wait long: as he spoke the words Jacob was quick to lift his head and lock his eyes onto Edward's. He beamed meekly.

Edward sighed a low moan, whispering "Oh yeah, these toys are perfect." Jacob swallowed harshly as he realized how the toys set off Edward. He could already imagine what kind of painful ideas were concocted in that sadistic mind of his….

"Subject me to all your fantasies, Ed… you know how much I need you to do it!"

His plea had become near begging, so that Edward's feral grin re-appeared. He gripped Jacob's shoulders and leaned in nice and close, whispering: "You bet I will, and you will curse the moment you asked me to do so."

Now Edward took definite control.

"Turn around." He commanded. The sudden authority in his voice caused Jacob to slip into submission pretty much instantly, and he obeyed the command without hesitation. Edward took hold of Jacob's hands and folded them behind his back, tying them firmly, though he took care not to hurt Jacob – yet.

"Turn around again to face me." Edward once again demanded, and once again Jacob complied. He kept his head down almost instinctively, though Edward grabbed his hair and pulled his head back, to stare him in the face properly. Jacob's expression had quite dramatically changed: he wasn't beaming anymore. What was left was a quiet, weak smile; the kind of stoic calmness that imbues the expression of prisoners that have completely come to terms with and accepted their fate, knowing full-well what is going to happen. A calm and relaxed, almost blank radiance emanated from Jacob.

"You're liking this, don't you?" Edward asked calmly though sharply. Jacob nodded slowly as his smile broadened a bit, but quickly fell back to what it was just before.

"You want me to use you?" Edward asked in a commanding tone. "Like a dog?"

Again Jacob nodded. Edward noticed how a glimmer of hopeful expectation struck Jacob's eyes at that question, reassuring him that indeed this was what Jacob wanted.

"Good. Before we continue, promise me that you'll tell me when the pain is too much, or when you don't like what I'm doing. I'll stop immediately, yes?" Jacob nodded; his smile broadened and this time it stayed wide. Edward let loose of Jacob's hair.

"I trust you Edward, to give me what I want." Jacob bowed his head down in respect of Edward's control and authority, as if to further make clear that he accepted all that was going to happen. When he lifted his head again, Edward noticed a changed expression in Jacob's eyes: he discovered trust, a glimmer of confidentiality, openness and honesty. Jacob's eyes were filled with the warmth that you know from a puppy that looks at you expecting nothing but love. This pet-like look betrayed Jacob's relaxed and calm state of mind in the hands of Edward.

For Edward this was slightly weird, as he hadn't expected Jacob to become so peaceful in his presence this quickly. He looked Jacob over, cupping Jacob's chin. He took a firmer hold and guided their mouths together, so that they could share a deep, passionate kiss. He withdrew, pushing Jacob's chin back a tad more forcefully than Jacob would have thought, and immediately sunk his teeth into Jacob's neck again. Jacob yelped and squealed as the pain blinded his sight for a moment – Edward made a point out of grinding the thin skin between his teeth.

Edward sighed deeply once he let go and looked Jacob over. "You have way too many clothes on you, my boy." And he stared down at Jacob's pants disapprovingly. Jacob nodded. "Yes, I agree." Edward's gaze shot back up to meet Jacob's glance.

"It's 'sir' for you." Edward retorted sharply. "Repeat what you just said, but now show me the respect I deserve." Jacob was slightly taken aback by the sudden change in Edward's demeanour, and he gulped lightly, after which he spoke: "I'm sorry, sir. I meant to say: 'Yes, I agree, _sir'_." Edward nodded in approval. "Good. You're a quick learner, it would seem."

Edward crouched down and fumbled with the buttons of Edward's pants. Fortunately he quickly had them open, and soon Jacob's pants and underwear were down on his knees. His hard cock jutted out, and was flailing about merrily. Edward looked at it with a smirk, making it bob up and down by pressing down on the cockhead with his thumb. It elicited a strained moan from Jacob who was trying to deal with both the powerful sensations of bliss emanating from his dick, and the twinge of pain he felt every time his dick was forced downward. He was compelled to bend down over together with his dick, and as a matter of fact that's exactly what he had tried, but a slap on his arse and a command of Edward had made it clear to him that he was only allowed to move when Edward told him so. Edward's already wide smirk broadened even more.

"Get on your knees."

Jacob gratefully complied, happy to be relieved from the assault on his dick. He quickly plummeted down and watched how Edward opened the zipper of his pants right in front of his face. He looked up at Edward with a smile, which quickly evaporated when he saw the harsh, stern expression on Edward's face. Though neither harsh nor stern were the right words: he looked positively terrifying. His eyes shot lightning, and the corners of his mouth were curled in a weak smile – a smile that contrasted horrifically with the outright icy edge of his stare. Jacob noticeably shuddered as a pang of fright lurched at his stomach, causing Edward's evil smirk to widen.

"Now, start sucking."

Edward had pulled his pants and underwear down only ever so slightly – just enough for his pale cock to jut out of his pants. Jacob immediately refocused his attention on the throbbing limb and took it in his mouth, embracing it with damp warmth. Edward moaned in appreciation.

"You're doing a good job down there, my boy." Edward let out in-between moans of pleasure. He lurched his head back and stretched his arms, folding them behind his head while the young boy had started to ferociously move up and down Edward's shaft with increasing speed, flicking his tongue at his dickhead every now and then.

_Let's see how fast he can go_, Edward decided. He gripped Jacob's hair firmly and started moving his head along. Soon Jacob started whimpering lowly, and his expression had turned into somewhat of a grimace. Edward watched down on him with a pleased sneer. As the speed increased and Jacob's warm mouth became sore, so did the tingling, burning sensation in Edward's loins grow. This felt just perfect, and Jacob's tongue technique was certainly something to remember! Even at this speed, Jacob managed to stroke Edward's dickhead now and then with the wetness in his mouth that playfully danced around Edward's pulsating cock.

_Enough for now_.

As he moved Jacob back up his shaft, he let loose and flung Jacob back, so that he ended up on his back, yelping and groaning as he hit the floor. Edward stood in front of the desk lamp behind him, so that it cast a long shadow down on the squiggling worm that lay before him. Edward smirked at the dramatic effect and took the gag and blindfold and put them on Jacob.

What was supposed to be a "Thank you, sir." came out rather muffled because of the ball gag, though a pleased undertone could certainly be discerned. He was now lying on his back as his dick bobbed up and down with crouched in front of his cock and balls, parting his legs as he sat down between them. Jacob's face turned tense at that point, probably expecting what was going to happen.

Indeed: Jacob jumped when Edward gripped his sac above his balls, and pulled them down slightly, stretching it. Jacob sighed and moaned, pleased with how his expectation of severe pain had turned into pleasure.

"Don't be relieved so soon, my boy. The fact that I don't deal pain doesn't mean I will provide pleasure." Jacob instantly tensed up again at the threat. He was biting his lower lip, waiting for the pain to start again.

It didn't come. Instead, bliss came: Edward started stroking Jacob's dick lovingly, jerking him off with slow and steady pumps, using his spit as lubricant. Jacob was more than enjoying it: his tense expression softened and a smile appeared. He started moaning lightly at first, but as Edward turned up the pressure, jerking him off more and more quickly, Jacob's stifled moaning became more incessant.

Jacob moaned a hardly recognizable "Oh god" as Edward took a renewed grip on his balls with his free hand.

He uttered an even less recognizable "Oh yeah!" when Edward applied some more of his spit to lubricate his iron dick, which was now frantically producing pre-cum. It streamed down his cock and collected in the grooves of his majestic abs.

"Enjoying it, my boy?" He asked seductively. Jacob was now positively panting and moaning at the same time with all the rushes of bliss that drowned him. Still, he managed to nod persuasively and produce a muffled "Very much, sir!"

"Good," Edward replied. "But one thing, my boy…." He then added threateningly. Jacob's blissful face immediately darkened somewhat as he awaited Edward's words: "You're not cumming until I say so, just like last time, got that?" Jacob nearly cried out at those words, but instead he restrained himself and replied with a submissive though muted "Yes, sir." Edward nodded appreciatively in reply and muttered a soft "good".

Slowly but surely, his jerking off became more and more persistent. Soon Jacob started to buck desperately, knowing full well he was not allowed to cum, yet his climax neared closer and closer. When Jacob began to moan and whimper, Edward slowed down a bit, and removed the gag so that he could understand Jacob. Jacob didn't waste his chance….

"Sir, I'm going to cum really soon! Please sir, slow down, slow down!" he begged, hoping Edward would comply. Edward wouldn't budge so easily however, and hissed: "No Jacob, you're going to have to deal with the pain of forcing your dick to behave. Mind over body. Good luck with that!" he retorted sadistically. Jacob had started squirming in an effort to keep his excitement at lower levels, but it was obvious it wasn't working out for him so well. He arched his back intermittently, fighting against his bonds, trying to keep his head cool. The radiating warmth that engulfed his loins and confounded his brain was, however, way too good, and he slipped closer and closer to climax.

Suddenly it all stopped. Edward had retracted his hand from both Jacob's cock and his balls. Now he simply watched the confusion drip from Jacob's dumbstruck face. It was fun to see how he had been so set on surviving the onslaught of mental bliss, that now that it was gone, he realized how good it had all actually felt. He was panting quite fervently from the effort, and no doubt he was happy that the danger of cumming had passed. And still… he looked positively disappointed that he wouldn't be cumming. After a minute of such conflicting feelings, Jacob noticeably relaxed, and rested his head on the floor. Edward saw it, and made sure Jacob wouldn't stay relaxed for too long. He chuckled hoarsely.

"I'm not done yet, my boy…" Edward stated calmly, causing Jacob to swallow harshly. "You will fight the urge to cum very soon again."

Edward walked over to the desk, took some clothespins and crouched down in front of Jacob's cock and balls. He inched closer with his mouth, so that his hot breath gently stroked Jacob's hard cock, which instantly twitched and came back to life after having received some rest. Jacob, still blindfolded, whimpered, expecting something bad to happen. He was surprised: Edward gently stroked the area between his balls and crack, eliciting a hoarse moan.

Edward didn't let him enjoy for too long, though.

He took a firm hold of Jacob's dick, and working his way up from his balls, started putting pin after pin after pin; soon Jacob's cock and balls were ordained with a load of clothespins. Jacob squealed at the sensation.

"Now then, my boy, squeal and squirm for your Master!"

He started jerking Jacob off feverishly. The skin of his cock, which was stretched tightly, seeing how hard his dick now was, pulled on the clothespins. These, in turn, resisted the tugging and stayed firmly in place, so that a stinging, burning sensation enveloped Jacob's cock and made Jacob whimper at first, but soon he was howling in pain. His dick felt like it was burning up on the one hand, but Edward's jerking by itself felt like heaven on the other hand. Once again Jacob found himself assaulted with feelings of pain and pleasure mixing into a conflicting, mind-grinding cocktail that had Jacob blabber incoherently after a short while.

"Had enough?" Edward asked sharply, raising his voice to remain intelligible over Jacob's continual, agonized wailing. Jacob nodded furiously, his face clenched in a tight grimace of utter horror and pain. In response, Edward took it down a notch, causing Jacob's howling to decrease in intensity too.

He gulped and coughed, his saliva having pooled in his mouth. Finally he managed to stutter an almost intelligible "Dear god sir, you're killing me! Please stop it!" Edward smiled, still pumping Jacob's clamped dick with iron resolve.

"You are resisting the pain well my boy. I'll reward you with a hard dick rammed up your tight, little hole. How does that sound?" Jacob nodded fervently.

_He probably wishes anything but this_, and he couldn't do but grin widely at the thought. He stopped jerking Jacob off, and grinned contently at what was going to come next. Jacob was already beginning to thank Edward for stopping when Edward cut him short.

"But first," Edward began, and Jacob's smile noticeably evaporated. He seemed to realize what was going to happen and he hated the prospect of it.

"But first, we remove all those pins!" Edward said; the pleasure in his voice was undeniable. First he put the ball gag back in Jacob's mouth and strapped it tightly behind his head, knowing full-well the volume of the screaming Jacob would soon produce. It seemed like Jacob understood from this action just how much he would be in pain: he clenched his jaw in a preparatory grimace, bracing himself for what was to come.

Edward moved over to remove the first pin. He could see how Jacob was bracing himself for the pain, but it didn't help him much: as soon as he removed the first pin off of Jacob's sensitive sac, Jacob yelped and screamed into the ball gag. And when Edward subsequently took the hurt skin in between his thumb and index finger and squeezed tightly, Jacob couldn't do but yell and bellow, as loudly as he could. Fortunately, it came out rather muffled due to the gag, so that nobody would be alerted. So it went with the next pin, and the one after that, and the other eight pins that Edward had managed to clamp onto Jacob's cock and balls. Each removal was greeted with agonized screaming and wailing, which had Edward smirk in satisfaction. And when Edward pinched the of blood deprived flesh, just when the blood rushed back full force, Jacob couldn't do but yell; the pain was maddening!

At the end of the ordeal Jacob was half delirious with the gushes of pain that he had been subjected too. He lay on the floor, panting. Edward stood in front of him, walked over to his side and rolled Jacob over with his foot. He removed the gag and blindfold and undid the ties, releasing Jacob from his bonds. Jacob merely turned his head so as to lie more comfortably, and whispered an almost inaudible "Thank you, sir", as a reaction to being untied. His face was completely relaxed, and he was smiling calmly, obviously being feeling relieved at the prospect of being let go. For the first time in about an hour, he moved his cramped arms and groaned heavily. Like the clothespins, he came to appreciate that removing the bonds and getting those stale limbs into action again was way more painful than having them tied up.

"Don't get too comfortable my boy, don't forget that I will still fuck you." Jacob nodded and mumbled a "Yes sir", the smile fading away slowly as he realized that it wasn't quite over yet.

"Present your arse to your Master." He slapped Jacob's aching arse playfully as he spoke the words. Jacob immediately complied, getting on all fours and propping his arse up. Edward came to stand behind him and stroked his arse.

"Oh my boy, you have such a lovely arse." His words were dripping with silent appreciation.

"Thank you, sir." Jacob replied, rather proudly. Edward kept stroking his arse, pinching now and then. Jacob yelped quietly, tensing his prominent muscles with every pinch that stung his butt cheeks.

"Yeah, you sure have a beautifully tight ass, my boy, and a sweet little hole. I'm sure we will both enjoy my fucking you." Edward said in a burly, forceful voice, gently patting Jacob's back. He stroked the crack with his hand before running his thumb down from the small of Jacob's back, down into the crack, all the way to his balls. Jacob moaned appreciatively, nearly forgetting the pain he had just endured.

"Like that?" Edward asked almost lovingly in a husky voice. Jacob nodded in reply, sighing and moaning quietly all the while. He had closed his eyes and his mouth was slightly opened. His muscles relaxed, and he shuddered every time Edward ran his cold thumb over his sensitive hole. Edward could feel its dampness; Jacob was hot and craving the attention. With every time Edward touched Jacob's hole, Jacob pushed back more and more forcefully onto Edward's thumb, moaning more incessantly every time he did so.

"Oh Edward, sir, stick your fingers in, I'm dying for some friction!"

Jacob didn't get what he asked for. Instead Edward smacked him on the arse so hard that he stumbled forward and had to quickly regain his balance, to which Jacob loudly bellowed a surprised "Ah _fuck_!" A red hand-shaped region beautifully marked the area of contact.

"_Beg_ for it, my boy, you know better than to ask for it outright like that" He pulled Jacob backwards and pinched his arse tightly and harshly, exactly where he had slapped him just before. Jacob squealed with the pinching – that was annoyingly painful in itself, but the fact that Edward did it so roughly in the area that still tingled from that blazing-hard smack made it a lot worse. He clenched his jaw tightly, bending his head down in a stiff grimace and tensing his muscles maximally in an effort to cope with his increasingly burning arse. Still Edward continued, hell-bent on ingraining the notion of 'begging for what you want' into Jacob's head.

"Sir, I'm so sorry! Please, _please_ stop!" Jacob finally grovelled. His legs and arms were trembling: his muscles were straining to their limits, their tensing being Jacob's prime pain-coping mechanism. Now that they were starting to get deprived of energy, they were giving up and shutting down, exposing Jacob to the full force of Edward's incessant hurting. What was potentially more problematic than aching muscles, however, was the banded arm, which had started to sting silently. Jacob shifted uncomfortably on that arm now and then. Edward didn't notice it, enjoying the torture too much.

"Beg my boy, beg your Master for what you want!" Was Edward's harsh retort.

"Sir, _please_ stop! It hurts so much! Please fuck me instead, sir!" Jacob wheezed in answer, his voice dry and croaky. "_Please_ give me your hard cock, my tight hole _begs_ for you to use it!"

Jacob was panting frantically, the words rolling out of him in a panicky, high-pitched voice full of hurt. He sounded shaken to the bone and in need of tokens of love and appreciation. Hearing those pained words, Edward decided to let go of the punishment, even if he was enjoying it a lot. Content with his sub's pleadings, Edward stopped his pinching, and stroked Jacob's arse instead.

"Good my boy, you learn well. For the future, remember to beg or endure this again – and next time, things will get _a lot_ worse for you." Edward emphasized the threat in a voice fraught with sadistic pleasure – he knew how it turned on Jacob.

Jacob gulped audibly at the threat, but his dick twitched in excitement. His panting had died down somewhat as Edward caressed his throbbing behind. He groaned lowly, whimpering quietly every time Edward put a bit of pressure on the hand-shaped red region on his arse. Edward sniggered at that. _He won't forget to beg, that's for sure…_.

"Now then. What did you want me to do to you, my boy?"

"Please sir, please stick your fingers in my hole." Jacob immediately replied, doing an effort to sound utterly submissive in his begging. Edward nodded. "Okay my boy, I will give you want you want."

He took some lube and applied some over Jacob's crack, after which he used his fingers to distribute it nicely in and around Jacob's small hole, putting in one finger as he did so.

Jacob sighed heavily, letting out a feral moan as Edward's cold finger breached Jacob's flaming-hot, tight little hole. When he was in until his knuckle, he moved around a bit, poking around Jacob's arse, looking for his prostate. To no avail sadly, but still Jacob seemed to have the time of his life: with every move of the finger inside him, he groaned with pleasure. His dick was painfully hard and was leaking furiously all over the place, too, so much so that a pool of the sticky liquid had formed on the floor, directly under his twitching dick.

"Like that?" Edward asked almost lovingly. Jacob nodded shallowly, far too entranced by the delicious burn that came from his hole to give a convincing answer. Edward meanwhile slowly fucked Jacob with the one finger. "Want another one up your arse?"

Jacob replied a lot faster this time. "Oh yes, sir, please, _please_ give me another finger!" He drawled, lurching his head back and arching his back so as to prop his arse up as far as he could. Edward smirked when he saw the effort Jacob took to give him easy access.

"Eager, aren't we?" Jacob let out a hazy moan in agreement with his Master's statement.

"Be careful that you're not too eager with that little arse of yours." He retorted, the words cutting through Jacob's sex-obsessed thoughts like a razor. Before he could react, though, Edward spanked Jacob's butt cheek; not as hard as before, but still a satisfying "smack" resonated throughout Jacob's body, making him cringe.

"I'm sorry sir, your fingers just feel so great in me…" Jacob immediately blurted out in a small, apologetic tone. "I know, my boy." Edward answered, and he slid a second finger in.

Instantly Jacob relaxed his muscles again, and pushed back on Edward's fingers. He groaned in pleasure at the feeling of Edward's sleek, wriggling fingers opening him up like that. Edward himself was smiling broadly, loving every moment of how Jacob completely let his guard down; how, at his touch and command, he became an obedient and opinionless servant, filled with a dog-like adoration. He transformed from a muscular hunk of a guy into nothing more than a begging mess, thanking him for every sexually arousing thing that he could do to him. He relished the moment and knew that this was what he had hoped to have for a very long time.

He sighed deeply as a tear nearly sprang from his lust-filled eyes at the thought. The finger-fucking that he was putting Jacob through slowed down, to Jacob's obvious discontent: his moans had subsided in volume. Longing for the stimulation, he pushed back on Edward's fingers, effectively finger-fucking himself on them. It took a few moments for Edward to snap out of his cloudy appreciation of the moment, and get on with the sex.

Jacob's moaning became more intense as Edward ramped up the fingering to the earlier speed. Now he also started making scissoring movements, stretching Jacob's hole in preparation for what was to come.

"Oh yeah Master, stretch that hole of mine…." Jacob drawled, his voice cloudy with pleasure. In reaction, Edward put in a third finger, eliciting a groan from Jacob. He was gasping and panting with the burning sensation, breathing heavily, squirming a bit here and there when Edward pushed his three fingers in roughly before sliding out at a gentler pace. To Edward's delight, Jacob's hole was less tight than last time: the three fingers caused Jacob less pain than before, if his reduced squealing was any evidence.

"You can take more than previously, boy. Been practicing?" Jacob nodded, moaning all the while. Edward smiled silently. "You can tell me later what you did to yourself while I wasn't here." Again Jacob nodded, this time with more enthusiasm.

By now, Edward's hard cock had started leaking, dying for some friction. His loins filled up with a horny tingling that compelled him to ram his iron limb into Jacob once and for all, but he decided to take it at a calmer pace. Last time he had been very rough, having been entirely overtaken by his most primitive instincts from the very start. He remembered how he lurched into Jacob, and Jacob's intense howling as he fucked him senseless.

_"Be careful with him, will you?"_

With that in mind, Edward kept making the scissoring movements. He'd be easier on Jacob during tonight's fucking. He had been quite good with the clothespins; he deserved a bit of rest.

"My boy, you're ready for the next step." He retracted his fingers and wiped them off on a towel that was lying aimlessly on the floor. He then went up the desk to pick up the butt plug, lubed it and went back to Jacob. Jacob was oblivious of what was about to happen, though Edward assumed he had heard the lube being applied. Finally, he positioned the plug at Jacob's hole, and started pushing it in slowly.

Jacob jumped at the cold touch of the toy, but very soon started to moan pleasurably with the renewed friction in his hole. It didn't last long though: soon the circumference of the butt plug became bigger than Edward's three fingers, and began to strain Jacob's tight hole. He started squirming and his muscles tensed again; the powerful quadriceps and glutes got rock-hard as the searing pain melted away most of Jacob's defences. He clenched his jaw shut as he cringed with the sudden fire in his hole. With every millimetre that Edward shoved the plug up his arse, Jacob's whining became more persistent, until he was screaming on full volume, shouting "Ow!", "Ah!", "God no!" and more such pained expressions. His head flailed around as he clenched his fists, even banging them on the floor softly now and then; all was in an effort to divert the pain so as not to have to confront it head-on.

It failed completely. With the final inches, Jacob screamed in utter agony.

Even with all the noise, Edward was not smiling; he was deeply concentrated, pushing in the butt plug slowly. "Just one inch more, Jake, you're doing good." He said soothingly. Jacob's heart skipped a beat at the loving tone, but still he felt his hole stretched _way _beyond what it could take.

"Master please stop! What is this, what are you doing to me!" Jacob bellowed in-between agonized grunts, groans and whines, hoping he would be freed from the insane hurt that his hole was being subjected to. "It hurts _so much_ Master!"

Here Edward _did_ smile.

"If you want me to fuck you, we need to open you up. A lot. Now take it like a man!" Edward retorted harshly. Jacob bit his upper lip, still squirming but trying to make Edward proud.

"One final push" Edward announced, and with one final howl that would have ripped through any weak man's heart, Edward rammed the plug in, where it remained lodged in Jacob's hole.

The pain stopped.

Jacob sighed in relief.

Edward smirked.

"Don't be relieved too soon. Don't forget it still has to come out."

"Damn" Jacob uttered under his breath, foreseeing what kind of pain _that_ would cause. Meanwhile Edward proceeded to lightly tap the plug, move it around a bit, all to which Jacob responded with squirms and more outcries of pain.

It was silent for a moment.

"Right. You stay here, I'm going to get myself a glass of water."

Edward stood up and walked out the room, smiling at the panting and infrequent whines Jacob was producing behind him. In the kitchen he picked up a lonely glass that stood on the kitchen counter and filled it up. He gulped the water down happily; the cold fluid wetted his arid throat and cooled down his hot skin and slowed his excitedly beating heart a bit.

Soon after he was back in Jacob's bedroom. The boy was not whining in pain anymore, but he certainly was not comfortable. Edward walked over, tapped the plug in Jacob's arse harshly to elicit another yelp, and then went over to Jacob's desk.

_Dildo next?_

He picked the toy up and glanced over to Jacob. He looked strung up and probably wouldn't last that much longer.

_Nah, I'll just fuck him._

He put the toy back and took his pants and underwear off, which had been hanging low from his waist. He casually threw them onto the bed, after which he went over to Jacob, took a good hold of the butt plug, and pulled it out at a less than friendly pace. As the plastic and latex toy slid out, Jacob wailed in pain at first, but soon it died down to a whimper and a sigh of relief as the last inch slid out with a satisfying "pop".

"Oh my god sir, thank you for taking it out, thank you so much…." Jacob blabbered. His voice was shakier than before, and his words came out soft and croaky.

"Shh my boy, the plug is out." Edward spoke reassuringly. Jacob relaxed in relief at the words, hanging his head low. A feeling of newfound freedom embraced him. Edward smiled beastly, his eyes filling up with lust when his eyes hit Jacob's glorious, stretched hole.

"Now I'll fuck you." He added, emphasizing 'fuck' in a manner that had Jacob tense again. He noticeably braced for impact, remembering the assault of two weeks ago. The muscles of his lower back were so tense that it was as if they would pop out of his body; Edward stroked them, following them up to Jacob's neck, which he briefly took a firm grip of. Jacob moaned quietly at the twinge of pain it caused.

_Typical. No matter how much he craves it, he is still scared of the pain._

Edward let loose and went to put on a condom. He applied lube to his rock-hard dick, giving it a good rub to spread the lube all-over. The feeling was dazzling; he had jerked himself off just 12 hours ago or so, back at Brad and Angela's, but he couldn't remember it feeling _this_ good!

_Fucking that boy is going to be so great.._. Edward thought as a devilish smile curled his mouth. Meanwhile he kept jerking his cock, gripping his sack and massaging it to enhance the feeling. He lurched his head back and let out a fiery moan filled with withheld passion, waiting to be driven out into the open.

When Edward was satisfied with his state of arousal, he took a good position behind Jacob, and started sliding his trembling member into his sub's brilliant arse. The plug had done its work admirably, making the penetration easier than last time. Jacob was groaning lowly; he was barely complaining, much more _liking_ the receiving of Edward's throbbing dick.

When Edward was fully in, he started to retract slowly, after which he immediately re-inserted again. Nice and easy at first, at a slow but steady pace. It didn't take too long for Edward to pick up speed though, and soon he was being all but gentle. Jacob had started to groan at the higher speed, clearly having a hard time shutting out the twinges of pain.

Edward got fired up even more than before: his dick was begging for some ferocious friction, leaking pre-cum in the condom like a dog drooling over a steak. Entirely taken by the delight and bliss that emanated from his cock, his loins were on fire. The pleasure was indescribable and his dick begged for more. He started slamming himself into Jacob's arse with feverish resolve as he felt himself rising towards climax. With every slam, Jacob yelped, as Edward's spearing dick hit the back wall of Jacob's insides. He clamped his teeth tightly, frowning wildly and grimacing at the burning pain.

"Oh your hole is so lovely, my boy!" Edward groaned as he kept assaulting Jake's hole. Hot sweat broke out that wetted his hair and dripped from his forehead down. Sweat also appeared on his toned chest, making his entire body glimmer in the murky lights of the desk lamp.

Both of them moaned, but only Edward moaned out of pure delight. Jake kept growling at the burning sensation in and around his hole, which got more intense with the continual and increasing speed of Edward's fucking.

Edward grabbed Jacob's hair and pulled his head back somewhat roughly. Jacob bellowed a low "Agh!" at the feeling, caught in surprise by Edward's sudden act. Not content with just that, Edward pulled Jacob's head farther back, taking an even tighter grip on his hair until Jake let out an agonized wail.

Edward let loose a bit at that point, smirking. "You enjoy that, dirty little boy that you are?" he spoke, in-between slamming Jacob's arse with his movements that had their flesh smack together. "Cursing your earlier eagerness, are you?"

Edward's voice was hoarse, and cracked weirdly as he spoke, switching between low and high frequencies like a schoolboy in puberty. He slammed himself harder and harder into Jacob, the delightful sensation now enveloping his brain in a mist of delirium. With every lurch into Jacob's fiery hole, drops of sweat launched from his forehead, to land on Jacob's hot back. Jacob was sweating like crazy too, tensing and relaxing his powerful muscles to withstand the assault that came from behind.

Edward inched closer to climax with every push: the exotic feelings that accompanied the orgasm further gripped his loins and moved further up to grab his already confounded brain; Edward turned it up a notch and fucked Jacob at high speed. Jacob groaned heavily, moaning in pain and yelping at every stab of Edward's dick, every time he slammed it deep into Jacob's little hole.

Edward was unaware of it all by now, however: he was riding the waves of pleasure, fuelled by the pleasurable burning feeling that emanated from his steel-hard dick and the frequent yelping and wailing of his dog-like boy-toy.

Finally, Climax arrived.

Edward felt how the feeling surged upwards and lifted him from the ground, sending him high into the sky where he seemed to walk in the clouds. He quickly pulled back out of Jacob, removed his condom with a wild tug, and then jerked himself over the edge. The warm feeling of the orgasm pervaded his entire body in a feeling of bliss. He came hard, his cum exploding out onto Jacob's tantalizing back, marking the golden skin with streaks of white. Jacob shuddered as the warmth hit his back from his arse crack all the way to his shoulders. By all means, to say that Edward came hard was a blatant understatement, and Jacob grinned inwardly. Even with all the pain, he was extremely pleased that Edward had cum so hard because of _him_.

Edward remained panting for a few minutes, until he caught his breath. His mind was blank; the hot orgasm had freed his mind from thoughts of worry and pain. He felt utterly relaxed as he softly stroked his hot dick.

After a minute, he turned his attention back to Jacob, who was shifting uncomfortably on the ground.

"Right my boy, you are allowed to jerk yourself and cum. You have five minutes, as of… now."

Jacob heard the beep of a timer starting. Edward watched him as he immediately rolled over onto his back and took his cock in a firm grip. Fearing that he won't be able to cum within the time limit, he jerked himself stupid. As fast as Edward had just fucked him, so speedily did Jacob's hand rush up and down his shaft. Using spit and his pre-cum he lubed his shuddering, release-craving dick as best he could. Within three minutes Jacob started panting intensely, breathing in an unsteady rhythm and not soon after he started mumbling incoherently. Strings of "oh yeah" and "oh god" filled the silence in Jacob's bedroom as he now too crawled towards the edge of climax. Finally, he was there:

"Oh yeah, Edward, I'm going to cum!" He exclaimed with a face that radiated desperate pleasure.

He kept repeating the words until finally he came. His fluid shot out from his caramel-coloured dick to cover his abs, painting them a meagre white. He came less hard than Edward, probably since he had been cumming at least once every day the past week trying some kinky stuff. Still, several firm streaks of white now adorned his abs in addition to his back, though the latter was now mostly smeared on the floor.

When he was done, Jacob merely lay down on the floor and panted. He blinked a few times, shutting one of his eyes in a way that Edward had found typical for him. He smiled as he saw the satisfaction on Jacob's face – his boy-toy.

So Edward sat crouched next to Jacob, and helped him sit up, wiping the cum off his abs and whatever was left on his back. Once he was cleaned up a bit, Edward embraced Jacob tightly and stroked his hair lovingly, as if to say "it's okay, the pain is over for now." His dominant demeanour melted away and he was transformed back into the Edward that Jacob knew from daily life – not the brutal beats that got unleashed in the bedroom. He stroked Jacob's hair lovingly and pulled him onto him – So Jacob leaned against Edward, arms around Edward's waist. Their breathing synchronized again in a calm, steady rhythm.

Soon, they were lying in Jacob's bed. It was small, but they were tired as hell after the day's and night's draining activities, so that they quickly fell asleep into a black, dreamless slumber.

* * *

The next day chirping birds awoke Edward. It was already light. He shyly opened his eyes and looked about the room. He wasn't quite sure where he was, until he remembered the day before. The diner, the accident and… the sex!

_Jacob!_

The boy was not in bed though. Edward was a bit disappointed at the cold emptiness beside him. He propped himself up on his elbows and looked around hazily. When he had given the room a good look now that the sun was up and shining through the lone window that was in the room, he decided to get out of bed.

He shuffled awkwardly to the bedroom door and opened it – he found himself in a kitchen. Jacob was sitting at a table. As soon as Edward opened the door, Jacob had started smiling heartily, the corners of his mouth reaching nearly from ear to ear.

"Good morning" he spoke happily. His face radiated a pleasurable welcome, probably from last night's sex. Edward smiled in response. "Good morning, Jake."

"You want to drink something?"

Edward nodded and came further into the kitchen, blinking and trying to dispel the sleep from his eyes. Meanwhile Jacob jumped from his chair and moved over to the refrigerator. He was wearing a pair of shorts, but that was it – no shirt, no top, nothing. His splendid muscles were in full sight, in all their caramel-coloured glory; all this to Edward's happiness, of course.

_I could easily keep waking up to this sight_, he thought, smiling at the notion.

"What do you want? Water, apple juice, milk… a cup of coffee or tea perhaps? Seems like we have to do some shopping again soon, though." Jacob rummaged through the fridge as he compiled the list of available drinks. When he was done he looked up at Edward from his bent-over position.

"Apple juice sounds good, thanks." Jacob nodded, took the almost empty pack of juice and a glass, and emptied the pack into it. He handed it over to Edward with a smile. "Here you go."

Edward gladly accepted the glass and took a sip. He felt a bit helpless, standing in Jacob's kitchen like that after having been so dominant over him just a few hours ago. Striking, how roles can change so dramatically, so quickly. In a way, he felt like they were back at Gaya, all that time ago. He remembered how he had fidgeted with his phone while Embry had stood next to him, and had forgotten his wallet.

_How ironic_, Edward thought to himself, and he smiled inwardly. _Embry was the key to Jacob, and he ended up being my biggest contestant too_. His inward smile unknowingly projected on his face, causing Jacob to stir.

"What are you smiling at?" He asked with a cheeky grin. He stood leaning against the kitchen sink with his arms folded. Edward looked him over and gulped. After seeing Jacob so many times, he still couldn't quite fathom the young native's beauty. His inner animal started to roar hungrily at the sight. Only now did he realize how his morning wood was poking from over the elastic band of his boxers. Edward stared down at it, his face becoming red. Thoroughly embarrassed he looked back up at Jacob, who was now grinning ear-to-ear.

"Heh, it's fine, don't worry about it. I've been up for an hour and had a cold shower, but believe me when I say that _that_ is exactly the state in which I woke up."

Edward grinned, hoping he would seem less embarrassed, but it didn't work out very well. Instead Jacob pushed himself away from the kitchen sink and walked over to Edward. "Come on, take a shower; you'll feel better." Edward nodded and complied submissively, following Jacob to the cramped bathroom. Jacob provided him a towel and exited the room.

Ten minutes later Edward stood outside the shower cubicle, drenched. He dried himself with the comfy towel Jacob had given him, moving it slowly back and forth around his waste and back, moving down towards his arse. The softness slipped into his crack; Edward moaned at the sensation and he realized how long it had been that he had played with his hole.

_God that feels good_, he thought as the towel comfortably slid in-between his butt cheeks and caressed his hole and perineum gently, making Edward moan lowly. He lurched his head back as he picked up the pace, repositioning the towel between his legs so as to better hit the perineum and sac.

A thought popped into Edward's mind that made him reopen his shut eyes, and made the rocking movements slow down: _Jacob ought to fuck me sometime_. He was slightly shocked at the thought, for wasn't he the Dominant? Does a Dominant ever get fucked? Isn't the Dominant the one fucking others?

_Perhaps not. Jake does whatever I tell him to do_.

He mentally slapped himself for that thought. Really, at this stage Jacob was no sub, slave or pet of him, and he couldn't expect him to do anything that he wanted. Perhaps though, one day, that would change. If he played his cards right….

When Edward re-emerged into the kitchen, nobody was there; he was only met with the emptiness of the house. Suddenly he heard some rummaging in Jacob's room. Carefully he slipped over there and stared inside silently. Here he found Jacob standing with his back turned to him. He was still shirtless, though now his pants hung lower than usual, revealing part of his crack. The muscular back supported careful movements of broad shoulders and arms. Edward licked his lips at the sight.

The hands he could not see. He heard a sound similar to that of a shaving machine, but it sounded harsher and more intimidating. It was no soft buzz, rather like a very much wind-down chainsaw.

Edward witnessed how Jacob slowly retracted his upper arm, bringing his lower arm to his chest. The sound became more pronounced as the source appeared above Jacob's shoulders and Edward had a clear view of what it was: an epilator.

_Is Jacob depilating his chest?_

The idea alone made him shudder.

Jacob moved the epilator closer to his chest, until it disappeared behind his broad shoulder. Still, it had not actually reached Jacob's skin. It approached so slowly that Edward began to wonder if Jacob wanted to go through with it at all. The slow movement betrayed a fear for the pain the process brought along with it.

But then the epilator contacted the skin of Jacob's chest and painfully tore out a few hairs. Jacob yelped softly, but this was followed by a sigh. To Edward it sounded like… like Jacob had been reunited with an old friend? Surely Jacob wasn't enjoying it?

The epilator made contact again, tearing several more hairs out, and again Jacob responded with a relieved sigh. He shifted his balance to the other leg, revealing a mirror. Edward quickly ducked behind the wall, afraid that Jacob might discover him staring. Curious as to what was going on in the room, though, Edward curiously peaked from his cover and looked inside.

Jacob wasn't exactly moaning, and his tensed up muscles betrayed a measure of hurt, but his quiet breathing revealed an equal amount of pleasure as the epilator graced his muscular pectorals. And as he continued with the depilating, his muscles relaxed more and more, as if they were re-adjusting to the sensations, painful at first, but relaxing and weirdly quieting later on. Looking in the mirror, Edward could see how Jacob had closed his eyes. He seemed utterly relaxed.

Edward was dumbstruck. How could anybody enjoy such a harsh treatment of one's skin?

Suddenly Jacob opened his eyes and caught Edward's figure in the mirror. He immediately lowered the epilator as he jerked around with a surprised look on his face. They gaped at each other. Jacob's chest was reddened, with tiny and infrequent spots of blood betraying locations where hairs had been pulled out roughly, ripping apart shallow capillaries in the process.

"Hey Ed… I uh… I didn't hear you come out of the shower," Jacob spoke, visibly embarrassed with the situation in which Edward had caught him.

"You were enjoying that?" Edward asked, an increasing curiosity on his face. "It sounds and looks horribly painful, but you're sighing with relief."

As Edward spoke, his curious look had changed into a vague grimace, followed by an expression of general surprise. Jacob scratched the back of his head as he looked down at the floor, still embarrassed.

"Yeah, I kind of do, I suppose."

Jacob sounded almost apologetic, but to Edward this was somehow good news. He'd talked to some subs before, but none of them were really into inflicting pain to themselves in their daily life; it really was something only their Dom did to them during play. Jacob was different, apparently, and Edward couldn't do but fantasize of the possibilities this implied.

Suddenly they both heard a bang; the front door had shut loudly. Floorboards creaked and rummaging near the front door betrayed a coat being hung up.

"Jake!"

A manly voice bellowed through the house, making Edward stiffen. _The guy in the wheelchair, Jacob's father…._

"Where the hell are you, Jake!"

_God he sounds angry_, Edward thought to himself, making him only more nervous and fidgety. Jacob apparently noticed Edward's tense reaction as he quickly dropped the epilator and moved over to Edward. He took a firm hold of his shoulder. "Don't worry, it'll be fine". He then stared at his opened bedroom door as he continued: "I'll go to him and try to introduce your presence calmly, so that –", but his plan-making was cut short.

Wheels and feet appeared in the door opening. Then a torso came into view, and finally the face of a lightly coloured man with long black hair materialized. His stare met Jacob's gaze and pierced Edward's back. Edward turned around slowly, feeling the old man's eyes scrutinizing his back. His eyes met the gaze of Jacob's father, and their stares locked onto each other. The expression on that face instantly turned near murderous as his eyes sparked and shot flames. His voice shaking with anger, he muttered but one word:

"You."


End file.
